Being a True Ally Requires Risk - Anything Else is Just Performance

On Saturday, a White Supremacist armed with an automatic weapon walked into a Buffalo, New York grocery store and shot 13 people, 11 of them Black and 10 of them fatally.

This is an act of Racism. Do not pretend it's anything else. This is what we must talk about today and every day, until this hate is eradicated.

Because our Black friends, family members, co-workers and communities are in pain. Deep, deep pain. And the rest of us have to step up a hell of a lot more than we have in the past to heal that pain and make sure it stops happening.?

One year ago, I had the incredible honor of being one of the speakers for the USF-Muma College of Business DEI Certification program. There were 135,000 participants and many, many of them connected with me on LinkedIn. A majority of these new connections were members of the Global Majority (i.e., not white), and as a result, I began seeing posts on LinkedIn that I previously had no access to.

Just as there is a thriving Black Twitter, there is a vibrant Black LinkedIn, full of posts about educational excellence, job success, entrepreneurship, and sadly, stories about experiencing microaggressions, bias, disparate treatment and outright violence.?

It saddens and angers me how segregated social media had been keeping us.

Every post that shows up in your feed has been specifically chosen to be served to you based on what some convoluted algorithm says will keep you engaged longer. If you aren't actively reacting to and commenting on posts from communities outside those you're already in, you aren't seeing content from those communities. Period.

So I want to share some of the deep, insightful, instructive, heartbreaking posts that you may have missed from the past 48 hours, and afterwards, give you a critical call to action.

Future Cain?shares what you can do to restore wellbeing in your workplace.?

John Graham?sends an empathy alert that this week is not "business as usual" for Black employees.

Yvonne Alston?explains how exhausting and emotionally draining it is to have this ache in her heart & soul.?

Deesha Dyer?wants everyone to know that it's okay to not be okay.?

Ashanti Maya Martin?poses a deep question about race relations, that sadly opens her to vicious attacks from fragile white folks who need to make it all about them.

Patrice Palmer?pleads with us not to "whatabout" this issue, pretend it is not about race, or ignore the causes of it in our own communities.?

And the most painful post of all,?Simone Crawley?- an accomplished DEI consultant, shares a tribute to her grandmother, Ruth Whitfield, who was murdered on Saturday by the gunman.?

Call To Action -- Read these posts.

Read the comments.

And if you see anyone showing up and showing their bias with comments like:?

• "Not all white people..."
• "Don't make this about race"
• "This is not the time to get political!"
• "I only judge people by who they are, not what they look like" (another version of "I don't see color" which is a complete lie)

...or any of a dozen other horrible things people say in these threads in an attempt to (whether they realize it or not) make themselves comfortable at the expense of Black voices...

And you are part of the community that is under attack, give yourself permission to do whatever will protect your mental health and wellbeing, whether that's walking away, engaging with the commenter, watching?a puppy video?on YouTube, or screaming at the top of your lungs. All responses are valid.

But if you have the privilege of not being the one that is the target of those dismissive, bordering-on-hateful comments, the privilege of being able to walk away and not think twice about any of this, the privilege of calling yourself an "ally" without putting anything at risk...

YOU be the person who shuts those comments down!

Hop into the fray.

Get dirty.?

Expend the energy.

As Abby Wambach said in?her commencement address?at Loyola Marymount University last week, "There is no such thing as solidarity without risk."?

If the privileged don't speak up, we put the burden on those who are already under attack.

The burden to educate.

The burden to defend.

The burden to put up powerful enough energy shields just to stay afloat in the face of such vitriol -- and yes, saying "Not all white people..." after a racially motivated killing spree is VITRIOL!?

Black people have far less need for white people to show up and say, "Hey, we're on your side!" than they do for us to show up where our fellow white people are?getting this so wrong and say to them, "We are NOT on your side! You are the problem."

White folks have an obligation to relieve the damage, anguish and exhaustion caused by those who look like us, even if we truly believe we aren't like them.?

It is the absolute least we can do.

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If you want to be part of a community sharing information and resources, join the recently-launched LinkedIn group,?Leaders Maximizing Workplace Happiness and Inclusion, where you're free to post your own on-topic thoughts and resources.??If you want more content from the Speak Happiness team,?follow us on LinkedIn or join the Happiness & Inclusion mailing list by going to?SpeakHappiness.com/Inclusion?to sign up and download the free workbook,?Five Policies That Outsmart Unconscious Bias in Your Company.??