Being Smarter is NOT the Answer
Ken Carlson PCC, CPCC and Petra Russell PCC, CPCC, ELI-MP - Prickly Pear

Being Smarter is NOT the Answer

We've rebranded as PricklyPear ! In early 2023, we began sharing weekly content (see below) with a focus on neurodivergent leaders and we truly hope it has made a difference for you. Recently, we introduced you to a new company that I (Ken) and Petra Russell, PCC, CPC, ELI-MP have launched to specifically serve neurodivergent leaders.

As Executive Coaches and Leadership Trainers we've had the opportunity to work with hundreds of neurodivergent leaders and coach them through many leadership and workplace challenges. Each week we will continue to share resources and insights for neurodivergent leaders and the rest of us.

This week we discuss why being smarter is not the answer to our problems. ______________________________________________________________

Being Smarter is NOT the Answer

I used to be smart. Really smart. My life depended on it. My inner life anyway. I competed with my classmates in Physics and Calculus to get the highest score each exam. As a young leader in business, I needed to have the best idea, the best team, the most innovative take on the idea. And I often thought I did.

I had learned as an adolescent that if I knew the right answer, I would garner praise from all the important people in my life. I was told that if I worked hard and got good grades, I would get a good job. I was told I would get promoted if I got the advanced degree or if I knew how to do all the right things better than anyone else.

Our entire university education system is set up to honor this very way of thinking. It’s the smartest, most accomplished individuals who get the primo jobs out of college. It’s the most published professor who gets tenure or gets the most sought after university jobs.

Imagine my frustration when I discovered that the path to being a better dad wasn't found in a book. Imagine my despair when I discovered that being smart actually seemed to make it harder for me to create love in my life. I submit that this is a moment that comes for most of us in our lives. The strategy we have used to make sense of our lives has stopped working. Some people call this a mid-life crisis, some call it a breakdown, others call it an awakening. I like the word awakening--but it definitely doesn't feel like that. I had never felt more lost in my life.

We’ve mixed up causation with correlation. Smart often means successful. But sometimes it is the biggest detriment to success. Take the example of a professor.?

The best, most amazing instructor is often not the smartest, most intelligent instructor. The best instructors create learning and it takes talent but they certainly don’t need to have the deepest understanding.

We need to break this habit. It starts with asking the question—what do I want to create instead of what do I know?

I stopped being smart when I realized it stopped serving me. Being smarter didn’t make me a better dad. It didn’t make me a better significant other and it certainly didn’t create more love in my life. Being smarter didn’t even make me a better coach or a better leader.

The same is true for all areas of life. I’m a coach and I’ve been doing this now for 16 years. It’s amazing how pervasive this idea is in our world. Everyone’s first question for me is—what advice to you have for me. Or for my spouse. :)

None.

What do you want to create? Let’s create that? It’s much tougher than knowledge. What’s stopping you from creating it now? Is it knowledge? Probably not. We usually know everything that there is to know about a topic that matters to us—we just don’t create it.

You want to create learning? Knowledge is just a start.

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Past Articles: Neurodiverse Leadership Resource Library

Want more resources on neurodiversity leadership? We are finding and creating resources for you. Watch this section expand every week.

April 5: All Executive Coaching Eventually Becomes "Life Coaching"

Mar 28: The Best Leadership is Service

Mar 22: Neurodiversity Week

Mar 15: Without Empathy We're Without Leadership

Mar 8: You Aren't Who You Think (Or Feel) You Are

Mar 1: Thriving Uniquely vs Suffering in Silence: The Benefits of Confidential Self-Identification for Neurodivergent Leaders

Feb 23: Who Needs Productivity Anyway? Did You See That Squirrel?

Feb 12: Emerging from Shame: Illuminating the Path to Neurodivergent Leadership Brilliance

Feb 1: Always Do Your Best Doesn’t Mean Always Do THE Best

Jan 25: There is Nothing Wrong but Something Is Missing

Jan: 19 What’s a Vision Anyway? Why Can’t They Just Do Their Jobs?

Jan 12: A Day in the Life of a Neurodivergent Leader: Navigating Autistic Demand Avoidance at Work

Jan 5: Redefining Autism: The Power of Self-Identification

Dec 21: Why Am I So Anxious

Dec 14: Cultivating Brilliance in Neurodivergent Leaders

Dec 7: Conversations Matter

Dec 1: The Trouble With Geniuses

Nov 17: Science Lesson

Nov 10: Living from Logic in an Emotional World

Nov 3: Communicating with Precision and Simplicity

Oct 27: Creativity and Innovation

Oct 20: How Neurodiversity is Making a Positive and Innovative Impact

Oct 12: It’s Lonely at the Top—Especially for Neurodivergent Leaders

Oct 6: Simply Different?

Sept 29: ADHD: The Kryptonite of It and Its Superpowers

Sept 21: Nerds (and Geeks) Are Leaders Too!

Sept 14 : Blind Spots: You Can't See Yours

Sept 7: People are More Difficult Than Algorithms

Aug 31: ADHD Kids Become ADHD Adults—but Sometimes the Tools Stop Working

Aug 25: Are you Dumb Enough to Manage Up?

Aug 18: Understanding the Avoidant Employee

Aug 10: Your Leadership is Not Served by You Thinking You are Less Than

Aug 4: Leaders Don't Want to Be Victims

July 20: Are You Overcompensating?

July 13: Why We Need the Outdoors

July 6: It's Not a Bug, It's a Feature

June 29: EMOTIONAL BIDS: What Do We Do When Someone Reaches Out to Us Emotionally?

June 15: The Boxes We Put Ourselves In

June 8: Please Just Tell Me the Answer!

May 25: Dyslexia and Leadership

May 18: Autism and Leadership: Advantages and Challenges

May 11: ADHD and Leadership

May 4: Hi Elon, I'd Like to Be Your Executive Coach

Apr 27: Surprise! Your Motivators are NOT Their Motivators

Apr 14: Managing Up Success Story

Apr 6: The Power of Routine

Mar 30: The Nerd Ceiling and Digital Body Language

Mar 22: Neurodiversity Makes For Better Leaders (Sometimes)

Mar 16: He Only Cares About Himself

Mar 9: Neurodiverse Leaders and the Power of One on One Conversation

Mar 2: What if My Neurodiverse Boss Sucks with People?

Feb 23: Why Am I So Anxious?

Feb 16: The Trouble With Neurodiverse Leadership (Forbes Article)

Feb 9: Your Straight Talk is NOT Authentic Leadership

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Staying In Touch

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