Being Reckless with Other People’s Hearts - Part 3 | #MyFridayStory No. 270

“Never be reckless with another person’s heart!”

I never cared too much about what other people thought of me, except for my older Brother. From a young age, I wanted to be like him. In every way, he was a perfect role model. And I was fertile ground for everything he sowed. I soaked it all up. He was my hero from as little as I could remember. Until I was 10 years old, I had my very own “live-in-the-same-room” superhero.

By the time I was a young adult, he’d taught me everything from what good social skills look like, to playing the guitar. Much of it was intellectual instruction, he shared copious amounts of his vast wealth of knowledge. But it was his religious instruction which I craved to most and that he patiently shared with me. In me, he found a hungry student wishing to learn as much as possible. Growing up, I had spiritual guidance on tap—ready whenever I needed it. I needed it often.

For a few years, after I got divorced, I was rarely without a partner. The romances seemed to “happen” for some time, without me pursuing such an outcome. After some false starts and heartbreaks, I met a lady through mutual friends that set us up on a blind date. Our mutual friends believed we were suited. They were right. We hit it off from the get-go. Our friendship grew over a few months, and we started dating.

Because we lived far apart, I always visited her house so she wouldn’t have to drive alone at night. We enjoyed each other’s company and our romance blossomed. I started staying over on weekends. She loved horse riding and had her own horse. She would go riding every weekend on a Sunday morning. Sunday mornings I would go to church.

I have always only been with partners that share the same faith as me. I never considered myself sanctimonious — until then. As much as we were attracted to each other, it bothered me that we were polar opposites in our faith. The relationship continued while my internal strife festered. I was too yellow, too much of a coward, to end the relationship. Inside I knew I was withdrawing and being distant towards her. Outwardly, I couldn’t muster the courage to face her with my truth.

When I did tell her it was over, it was only after she had seen me hand-in-hand with another woman and confronted me about it. I blamed our differing beliefs but couldn’t explain why I was too ashamed and too ashamed to face her.

It was some months later, I was contacted by a doctor from a psychiatric clinic. They asked if I would be prepared to come through to acknowledge the pain and suffering, I caused. After my cold and callous end to our relationship, she had tried to end her own life.

I sat and listened as she spoke, explaining what my actions had caused. As part of her recovery, finding peace with her perpetrator was important. I apologised for the grief I had caused her and her kids and left the clinic. I went to my Brother for advice and to find solace for my actions.

He listened as I tried to explain my innocence. When I’d finished rambling, he shouted:

“Never be reckless with another person’s heart!”

Fortunately, she went on to fully recover from the trauma. We have remained friends and still grab a cuppa Java from time to time. I hope and pray that’s my last foray into being anything but a blessing to those around me.

Have an awesome weekend and please be generous! ??

As always, thanks for reading ??

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