Being Afraid of Networking and Making Excuses + Top LinkedIn Posts

It's really scary to put yourself out there in front of other people. What if they judge you? What if you fail? What if you lose your reputation by saying the wrong things?

We are taught as children that STRANGER equals DANGER. No wonder why 90% of people are not interested in networking.?

Networking has also been polluted by people who are selling in a SLIMY way.?

You walk into a networking event - a guy with way too much grease in his hair walks over to you with a handful of business cards and a fake smile and hands you a card. He says, “You look like you need some life insurance, you should call me.“.

Best case scenario? He walks away.?

Worst case scenario, he starts talking about his business for what seems like an eternity and you have a sudden urge to use the bathroom. You excuse yourself to use the bathroom and you use the exit to go home because you are done with networking.?

Networking has gotten a bad rap because so many people are AFRAID of it. It's like public speaking. 90% of people are afraid of public speaking. Most do not know they even have the FEAR because they never tried it.?

I personally did not know I had a fear of speaking, I just made excuses.?

“I'm more of a one on one person” or “I am a private person” or “I am not one of those arrogant, speakers who need to get all the attention.”

It was just the little voice in my head trying to protect me from putting myself out there.?

It's not about talent, it's about SKILL.?

Even the MOST TALENTED athletes need to practice to be great.?

Networking and Speaking publicly are no different. You must improve your mindset, learn the skills, and practice.?

Networking is the process of nurturing and growing your network of relationships.?

We all do it naturally but we do not all do it proactively or strategically.?

Being strategic when it comes to networking is KEY because if you are missing a strategy, you will end up wasting your time networking with the wrong people.?

Ask yourself the following question: “How often do I reach out to the 30 people in my network that know me, like me, trust me, and can refer business to me?”

I used to NEVER DO THIS because I did not want to “WASTE people's TIME”. Why would they care about me!

Here is a strategy…. DO NOT MAKE IT ABOUT YOU!

Novel idea right?

Make it about THEM… When you reach out to someone, you can invite them to an event you are going to.?

I made 30 invitations last week to people in my network and two of them declined but offered to get on a call to catch up. Every single person responded.?

These are relationships I am reaching out to!?

Here is another idea: Ask your top relationships about their goals! Ask them who they want to meet. Ask them if there is anything they want you to READ and provide feedback on.?

Be clever with the way that you follow up and you will have MORE CONNECTIVITY with your network.?

Will some people get annoyed at you for communicating because they are OVERWHELMED with communication? YES! That might happen.?

But that is NOT ABOUT YOU and they can also ignore the email or not respond to the TEXT and your job is NOT TO TAKE THAT PERSONALLY.?

Never take it personally when someone does not follow up with you.?

I am part of a NETWORKING organization that has 80 members, NOT EVERYONE RESPONDS right away.?

But they see it and when they see me in person they mention that they got it and often tell me they meant to reply but it got away from them and they REALLY APPRECIATE my outreach.?

I am the leader in my relationships which helps me generate business but it also helps me make a difference for people in my network.?

If you feel like people are not reaching out to you, it's because you are not reaching out to them.?

I do have a select group of people WHO REACH OUT TO ME when I do not reach out to them. I KNOW WHO THEY ARE and I put special effort into responding to them RIGHT AWAY and adding even more value to their life.?

95% of getting the JOB is showing up.?

Are you showing up with your relationships? Are you showing up with your clients? Are you showing up with your vendors??

Tell people WHAT YOU ARE LOOKING FOR when you network.?

Here is a strategy that will help you overcome your FEAR of networking in person.?

Go with a friend to a networking event and SPLIT UP. Tell your friend your GOAL and INTENTION, he will look out for you and you will look out for him.?

Meetup in the first 30 minutes and exchange notes about your experience and it becomes a game.?

Here is another way to get comfy when at a networking event.

ACT LIKE THE HOST.?

Welcome people as they walk in, ask them who they want to meet, and make introductions between people.?

When you do not make it about YOU the pressure is OFF because you are there to serve.?

Yes, people will find you interesting and some people will want to connect with you in a deeper way.?

I am proud that I was able to overcome my fear of speaking in public and now I can GO TO ANY EVENT at ANY TIME and connect with anyone without feeling scared.?

Do I get the butterflies in my stomach from time to time before I do my elevator pitch? SURE! That still happens occasionally BUT I learned to BREATHE in from my nose deeply when I feel that and understand that it's EXCITEMENT, not NERVOUSNESS.?

You can tell yourself any story you want and you will believe it :)

I am excited to share! I am excited and that energy can be TRANSFERRED to other people. People tell me they feel my enthusiasm and want to do business with me because I AM ALIVE.?

Hope you got value from this article today, let me know what your experiences are with networking in the comments below.?

Let's review some LinkedIn Posts Now

Instead of me reviewing EVERY LinkedIn post, I'm just gonna give you my TOP 10 posts from the past week. Deal?

1) The Interview: I recently did an interview with a potential employee and it was very interesting, she started crying. Read the whole story here.

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_recruiting-globalbusiness-kindness-activity-6931707327376990209-nyd7

2) Authentic LinkedIn Connections: Getting to know your connections is about going deep and BEING REAL. Check out this post here that explains how to do that.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_showmethemojo-activity-6931581504187731968-mjrT

3) Benefits of Podcast Guesting: Here I explain the benefits of Podcast Guesting and why it's so important to have that as part of your marketing strategy.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_podcastguest-podcast-activity-6930093548834832384-Se5l?

4) Business Concepts: I created a list of 30 important business concepts that I shared asking people which one they want to learn most so I can create mini-workshops about them. Check them out here.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_which-of-these-business-concepts-do-you-need-activity-6929755866011193344-Sft1

5) Mothers Day Love: I wanted to share some love on Mothers day about all the mothers out there and I wrote up this post that I think you will find interesting and inspiring. BTW it's not too late to wish people a happy mothers day even if it has already passed.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_love-mothersday2022-activity-6929061052127035392-FBoA

5) ESG and SDG Survey: Interesting to see how many people care about the environment and being socially responsible in business. Check out this amazing survey.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_esg-esginvesting-sustainability-activity-6928354195414630400-cRst?

6) Follow Up from Networking: Here is a video reminder about the power of following up. Most people show up and throw up, I say show up and follow up. It does take longer to follow up than it does to show up!

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_hentips-networking-activity-6927232890061647872-4vSE?

7) Improve your MONEY: Ever wonder what self-limiting beliefs people have around MONEY? Make sure that you read this post as it breaks down how to change them.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_money-beliefs-personaldevelopment-activity-6926944159069057024-3Z7G?

8) Public Speaking Tips: Want some tips to improve your public speaking? Check out this post where I break down a few tips that might be helpful for you.?

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_linkedin-networking-life-activity-6930930422289735680-jH0T

9) Fear of the Ocean: I was TERRIFIED of the ocean but I had to get over the FEAR. I did it by getting diving certified and jumping to the bottom of the Atlantic ocean. Check out the story here.

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_creativity-goals-activity-6929769638738190336-hZhY

10) Success on LinkedIn: Last week I did a LinkedIn newsletter with a bunch of LinkedIn Tips, in case you missed it, here is the post:

https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/joeapfelbaum_strategy-linkedin-success-activity-6926900024094154752-FFcI?

That's it folks, hope you got value from this article, please like and comment if you enjoyed it.

This is my 17th newsletter this year and my goal is to get 50 out to you! Please hold me accountable to getting this done because its fun to start something but the fun sometimes gets OLD. Your comments and likes do encourage me to keep going so If you get value from this, please make sure you let me know :)

About the Author:

Joe Apfelbaum is the CEO of Ajax Union a B2B Digital Marketing Agency in Brooklyn NY. Ajax Union develops marketing funnels for companies that want to be more strategic. Our strategies include lead generation, account-based marketing, awareness campaigns, and prospecting.

We leverage search engines, social media, and email marketing to support your goals and get the right traffic into your marketing funnel so you can have a positive ROI. To learn more go to?www.ajaxunion.com?and watch the marketing funnel presentation!

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