Behind the Smile: Setting Healthy Boundaries at Work

I get this question a lot, and it’s something I’ve truly learned over my many years in the industry: setting healthy boundaries at work. When you first start a job, the instinct is to prove yourself—to show that you’re not only meeting but exceeding expectations, often by over-delivering. Many of us have that "overachiever" mindset. But what I’ve learned is that when you consistently go above and beyond without setting boundaries, you’re enabling bad behavior from your leaders and creating an unhealthy dynamic for yourself.

Over time, if you're the person always coming in early, staying late, and handling more work than you’re compensated for, people begin to expect it. You're seen as the dependable one, but at what cost? By stretching yourself thin, you're working longer hours, often without additional compensation, and blurring the line between work and home life. This lack of balance isn't sustainable and can lead to burnout.

In this article, I’ll share some insights into setting healthy boundaries at work, which is your right. Labor laws establish reasonable expectations for how many hours you're supposed to work. Most of us are on an 8-hour workday unless we’ve agreed to something different. Now, with many companies pushing for a return to the office, it’s the perfect time to set these boundaries. Let your employer know: "I’m happy to come into the office for X days a week, but these are my set hours." Once your workday ends, turn off all channels of communication. This separation is essential for your mental well-being.

One personal practice I’ve adopted is setting my out-of-office reply at the beginning of my workday. This lets my team know when I’m available, while also holding me accountable to my working hours. Once the day is over, I’m clear that I won’t be responding until the next business day. I also make it a priority to schedule a real lunch break—not one where I’m eating at my desk. I take time to have lunch with a colleague or friend nearby, and when working from home, I might whip up a quick meal, catch up on a favorite show, or walk my dogs. This routine allows me to take a mental break, rest my eyes from the blue light of screens, and even sneak in a few extra steps for the day

Now, some of you might be thinking, “But if I don’t go the extra mile, I’ll miss out on promotions or being recognized for my efforts.” But here's the reality: pushing yourself without boundaries often leads to burnout, and it enables poor behavior from leaders. When you’re always available—answering emails, taking calls, or working on weekends—you’re signaling that it’s okay to reach you anytime, regardless of urgency.

I remember early in my career, I was always connected. I answered calls at all hours, even during personal events. One moment that stands out is when I was working during my daughter's birthday party. Instead of enjoying the time with my family, I was in a room, handling work that could have waited. I thought I was being a team player, but in reality, I was setting myself up for failure.

I also had a colleague who was frustrated by a manager texting early on a weekend, demanding a report last minute. The issue wasn’t that the work was urgent; it was that the manager hadn’t planned properly and expected my colleague to fix the situation. I advised them to stop responding to these last-minute requests, explaining that by doing so, they were enabling bad behavior. Most of us work in environments where nothing critical will happen if you don’t respond immediately. One of my favorite phrases is: "Your poor planning does not constitute an emergency on my part."

Of course, setting boundaries isn’t always easy. When I first started, I experienced some backlash—being left off meeting invites, not being included on new projects or offsite events—but I gained something far more valuable: time. Time to focus on what matters to me, to spend time with my family, and to invest in my personal well-being. In the long run it actually worked to sustain my tenure where as others that didn’t adopt the courage to say no fizzled out within 2 years.

At the end of the day, remember this: we weren’t put on this earth to work around the clock. Setting healthy boundaries allows you to reclaim your time, energy, and mental health. And that’s something worth fighting for.