Behavioral Signs
D'Sheene Leoline Evans - MSW, MPA
Founder & President at Eyes of Power Trauma Coach
It deeply disturbs me to write this post, but I find it necessary to raise public awareness.
Yesterday I saw a young boy (8 years old) eating an ice cream and when I took a closer look, I felt a tightness in my stomach because I remember seeing this behavior before from a 10-year-old girl that had been on my caseload when I worked in the social services field.
I walked-up to this young boy who was with his mother, and I said to the mother "may I ask your son a question about his ice cream". She gave me an odd look and then said it was okay. I asked this young child what flavor was his ice cream? He answered (butter pecan) and I replied "wow" that's my favorite. Next, I asked him if he always eat ice cream the way he was eating it now, but before he could answer his mother replied that he has been doing that since attending his new school.
As I continued to probe, this young child shared that Mr. L from the school brings him ice cream and I asked if Mr. L brings all the kid’s ice cream and he said no. Next, I asked if the other kids become sad because Mr. L only gives him ice cream. Turns out that this Mr. L. brings this kid ice cream at the broom closet and what I realized is that this kid was describing oral performances.
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His mother eyebrows raised and she was mad to learn this, so I asked her permission to let her son know that he did nothing wrong, that he was actually a hero and that his mom and I are happy that he told us about Mr. L. I explained to him that there is good and there is bad ice cream and that the ice cream from Mr. L is bad and to promise not to go back down to meet him by the closet at school and he said "I promise"
I offered his mother my phone number and we exchanged numbers. As soon as I returned home, I called a few lawyers in my network and found one that agreed to take action on her and her son's behalf.
As parents we must pay attention to the behavior of our children. In this case as an adult in our observation if a child is using their tongue to lick ice cream upwards and downwards and doing things that is not a norm for a child we MUST talk with that child and probe in non-threatening ways.
I pray that Mr. L is brought to justice along with anymore Mr. L's working in the school system with our young and vulnerable children.
Thank you for writing about this. I suggest to a lot of parents to read Body Science by Meg Hickling to their small kids and keep talking with them about boundaries, sexuality and that it includes family so that they protect their kids from sexual and other abuse. Thank you again.
Assistant Executive Director for Health at Forestdale Inc
2 年Thanks for posting, did you report MrL to child protective services?
Addiction Counselor
2 年I'm glad that you posted this and that your past experienced with another youth, allowed you to jump into ACTION mode. Also glad that the mother was open to you asking those odd questions (which anyone would of thought was strange) and that you made the mother aware of what has been going on with her son. I hope that Mr. L-got prosecuted, sentenced and convicted.
Clinical Supervisor
2 年Awesome content! Thank you for sharing about the need to observe and have the courage to take action when something does not look right. I'm certain this situation could have advanced to become much worse!
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2 年Thank you.