BEFORE DINNER

The third in our series of articles about Weddings in the time of COVID looks at how to get the most out of the time from when you leave the ceremony to when you sit down to dinner.

The hour or two before the wedding feast is always an important bridge between the emotion of the ceremony and the unfettered joy of the celebration. While you and your photographer are busy capturing some of the images over which you will reminisce forever, your guests will take the opportunity to compose themselves over a nibble and a glass of something decadent. It’s a chance for them to catch up with friends and family – those they might see every day and those they might not have seen for a long time. And it’s a chance to meet new friends from a new family and to discover all of the things that we Irish inevitably share in common – sure, you were probably in the next tent at Electric Picnic!

So how will our new normal impact this portion of your day?

Timings

The first thing to consider is how restrictions will affect your timings for the whole day. Depending on the level of restrictions, weddings may have to be over by 11.30pm. When you roll that back through the DJ and the band and the speeches and dinner, your drinks reception will probably begin a couple of hours earlier than normal. You will therefore have to consider how to leave enough time between the ceremony and when you sit down to eat so that, firstly, you have time for photographs and, secondly, your guests have time to get to the venue and settle in. Make sure to have a very clear “programme” agreed with the venue so that everything can run smoothly on the day.

Photography

Having left the ceremony, you and your wedding party will head off to take the more formal wedding photographs. There are 3 key things to consider when planning your shoot.

First of all, social distancing must be a given. Your wedding party will probably include some older members of the family and will certainly include people from different households, so keep them well apart throughout the shoot.

Secondly, close contact for a protracted period should also be avoided and that means getting though the shots as quickly as you can.

And thirdly, avoid any and all loose props that might transmit infection.

With all of that in mind, it’s really important that you plan in advance with your photographer and leave nothing to chance. Agree on the shots you want and who will be in each photograph. Keep it simple – remember, the more elaborate the pose, the more time it’s going to take. And accept that you simply won’t have the luxury of candid snaps and spur-of-the-moment ideas.

So, know what you want and get it in the can – -as quickly as you can!

Rules are Rules!

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, the natives are getting restless! You know what it’s like. Everybody arrives at the same time and nobody is quite sure what to do or where to go. On top of that, everyone is still a little bit emotional and, in all the confusion, there’s going to be restriction-busting contact and interaction.

So, nip the fluster in the bud with clear signage and communication at the entrance to and inside the venue. Mark entrance and exit paths and routes to the toilets. If there are other functions taking place in the venue at the same time, you might also have to let people know that they must not stray into or mix with other guests. Position sanitisers in conspicuous spots and make sure that there are enough staff to answer any questions your guests might have. Regulations may require that staff are on hand to open venue doors so that people are not touching the same spot over and over – these staff would be well-placed to provide any clarification required.

You should also decide in advance what your policy will be regarding masks and face-coverings. Staff may be required to wear masks unless they are serving from behind plexi-glass screens and regulations may require that guests wear masks when arriving at or leaving their table. But you should decide and clearly communicate your preference regarding masks in other areas of the venue. It might even be an idea to provide masks in case guests have forgotten or should they lose theirs.

Food & Drink

A smaller guest list gives you the opportunity to be a little more creative with the cocktail menu at the drinks reception. Maybe rename old classics after memories from your lives – a Hairy Wallbanger after that ill-advised mullet in college; an Auntie Mary after your mum’s mad sister; or a Porn Star Martini after… well, you get the idea!

The format and service of food will also be subject to the prevailing restrictions. Self-service or buffet presentation will probably be out-of-bounds as will shared dips or ‘family’-style service from communal serving dishes. Popular alternatives are single-servings presented in Bento Boxes or ‘Cheese Boards for 1’, but you should talk to your venue about other options. Remember that, if single servings are pre-packaged off-site, any providers must also comply fully with the level of restrictions in place so discuss that with your venue also.

It is likely that both food and drinks will have to be served at the table and you should make sure, if your guests are mixing with guests from other tables, that they are complying with the rules – keep your distance and keep it short.

Entertainment

Depending on the level of restrictions in place, you may have to tailor your entertainment plans for the drinks reception. The string quartet might be off-limits and your cousin that sings like a lark might have to wait for another day. Depending also on your event plan and on the time allocated to the drinks reception, you might have to provide some alternative entertainment to keep the buzz going, especially if guests are required to remain seated.

This is your chance to have a bit of fun with some games for all the family. Test their knowledge of the bride and groom with a table quiz about you both or put together a photo or video montage of your lives before and your life together, ideally featuring as many of your guests as possible. Just remember that props are taboo, so no swapping quiz sheets between tables for scoring. It’s all just for fun.

This is a time for people to take a breath and to get in the mood. You want to wind them up slowly so that they are relaxed and ready for the craic by the time you all sit down to dinner. So be creative and even a wee bit wacky – but remember that this is also a time to set down the expectation that people will respect the rules and respect each other’s right to have a good time on their own terms.

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