Becoming Unstoppable: Mastering the Art of Negotiation

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On Monday, I was recording a podcast with one of the best negotiators, Meelis Lao , and he asked me, "What ability or trait do the best negotiators have?"

I said, "Leverage." He said, "No, although leverage is good, you don’t always have it." Then I said, "Listening skills." He said, "Almost, it's empathy."

Empathy towards another person, putting yourself in their shoes. But there's a catch. You can’t truly put yourself in another person’s shoes if you haven’t lived or experienced the same things.

If you agree that everything in life is sales, then we're always negotiating, with our friends, colleagues, but first and foremost, with ourselves.

But how can I become unstoppable while negotiating?

Let's delve deeper.

Unstoppable

The word "unstoppable" originates from the combination of the prefix "un-" (meaning "not" or "opposite of") and the root word "stop." It is a relatively modern term in English, formed to describe something or someone that cannot be halted or prevented from achieving its goal or continuing its course.

"You are never in control. What you can control is your preparation, your mindset, and your level of respect and understanding for the other side." - Chris Voss

Christopher Voss is a former FBI hostage negotiator who brings decades of experience in high-stakes negotiations to his work as an author, consultant, and speaker.

His approach to negotiation is grounded in empathy and tactical empathy, where understanding the emotions and motivations of the other party is key to achieving successful outcomes.

Voss emphasizes the importance of active listening, mirroring, and labeling emotions to build rapport and gain leverage in negotiations.

His book, "Never Split the Difference," co-authored with Tahl Raz , has gained widespread acclaim for its practical advice and real-world examples derived from Voss's time in the FBI. Voss continues to teach and train individuals and organizations globally on negotiation skills that can be applied across various contexts, from business deals to personal relationships.

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• More information;
• Schedule an introductory meeting.

One Notable Case Study: The Cuban Missile Crisis

• Background:

The Cuban Missile Crisis of October 1962 was a pivotal moment during the Cold War between the United States and the Soviet Union. The crisis began when American spy planes discovered Soviet ballistic missiles being installed in Cuba, just 90 miles off the coast of Florida.

• Leadership Role:

President John F. Kennedy of the United States and Premier Nikita Khrushchev of the Soviet Union were the key leaders during this crisis. Their decisions and actions would determine whether the world would plunge into nuclear conflict or find a peaceful resolution.

• Tactical Acumen:

Kennedy and his advisors deliberated on various strategies, including a naval blockade of Cuba to prevent further missile shipments. This decision aimed to exert pressure on the Soviet Union while allowing time for diplomatic negotiations to proceed.

• Resilience Under Pressure:

Both Kennedy and Khrushchev faced immense pressure from their military and political establishments to take decisive action. Kennedy's ability to manage a delicate balance between firmness and diplomacy was crucial in avoiding escalation.

• Strategic Decision-Making:

Kennedy's leadership was marked by his strategic handling of communication and negotiation with Khrushchev. He sought to defuse tensions while maintaining U.S. credibility and security interests in the Western Hemisphere.

• Impact and Legacy:

The Cuban Missile Crisis ended with a diplomatic agreement known as the Kennedy-Khrushchev Accord. The Soviet Union agreed to remove its missiles from Cuba in exchange for the United States pledging not to invade the island and secretly agreeing to remove its own missiles from Turkey.

• Conclusion:

The Cuban Missile Crisis stands as a testament to the importance of leadership, diplomacy, and strategic decision-making in times of international crisis. Kennedy's handling of the crisis showcased his ability to navigate perilous waters with caution and resolve, ultimately averting a catastrophic nuclear confrontation and setting a precedent for future Cold War negotiations.

Two Execution Strategies to Become Unstoppable in Negotiations

I Master Tactical Empathy:

• Develop a deep understanding of the other party's emotions, needs, and perspectives.
• Use tactical empathy to build rapport and trust, crucial for effective negotiations.
• Acknowledge their feelings, validate their concerns, and demonstrate understanding.
• Create a collaborative atmosphere where both parties feel heard and valued.

II Embrace Tactical Silence

• Utilize deliberate pauses and silence strategically during negotiations.
• Silence can create discomfort, prompting more information or concessions from the other party.
• Gather crucial insights and gauge their commitment level without compromising your position.
• Encourage thoughtful responses and deeper understanding of the other party's intentions.

A Question For You

What's the most effective strategy you've used to navigate tough negotiations and achieve win-win outcomes?

A Captivating Video

I first discovered Jeremy Miner 's unique approach to sales and negotiation about 7-8 months ago. His style stood out for its curiosity and natural flow, resembling a genuine conversation.

Since then, I've integrated his techniques into my approach with great success. Recently, I came across his latest video on sales training and thought it could benefit my network. Miner's method transcends the standard "features and benefits" approach by prioritizing an in-depth understanding of prospects' challenges. Through neuro-emotional questioning, he empowers them to articulate their needs, making it an invaluable strategy for those seeking to elevate their sales performance beyond mere metrics.

Let me know you two cents in the comments

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Bonus: get valuable winning strategies from my podcast (while most episodes are in ????, we are expanding our English content).

This newsletter is for those who refuse to settle.

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Be Great

- Chris