Become a Joiner: Find Your Community

Last night I was watching a new documentary on Netflix called, “Join or Die.” Within it, the documentary focuses on the ideas in Robert Putnam's book: “Bowling Alone,” which I promptly put on hold at my local library. It was such an eye-opening experience to watch this documentary last night because I've been trying like hell recently to figure out how to build a community in the fashion industry for quite some time now. Several years ago, I was given the advice by a slew of career coaches to just start sharing free content on a multitude of platforms to attract people to our deep level of knowledge about apparel. We have been doing that for about 3 years now, and while we've seen the rewards of that, and we've seen how this has helped individuals immensely, the Netflix documentary that I watched last night was speaking directly to the heart of an issue that I've been wondering about for some time now…

Why aren’t we coming together as a larger community like so many other groups do?

Essentially, Robert Putnam's book and this documentary outline the fact that the total number of groups our communities offer have been diminishing and decreasing in attendance since the 1960s. And in a time where our country feels more and more divided, there is a real need for us to find groups and connect with people in our communities more than ever. What I didn't realize before, even though I had been feeling this same way for a while now, is that by creating an inclusive community and finding a way to truly grow it for our industry, we might also help all of us live happier lives and live longer lives.

As a new small business owner back in 2021, it was my first instinct to seek out a mentor and a community to join. After decades working inside offices where I was forced to be part of a team and a community that I didn’t necessarily choose, it was now such an exciting time in my life to be able to hand-pick the people I wanted to be surrounded by. Since that time, I've been a part of four different group coaching programs. One of them was a very expensive, high ticket, close contact mastermind with less than ten other brilliant women who I consider to be some of my greatest friends today. I've invested over six figures of my small business income to join these groups and learn from leaders what I needed to know to grow, scale and succeed. So when the documentary started talking about people who don't have that instinct, and who have been more comfortable to stay individualized and alone in our current society, it started to give me a window into other people's perspectives that differ from mine.

I've always been a joiner.

In elementary school, I loved to be a part of groups, clubs and team sports. In high school, I was our student council body president, I was a member of the National Honor Society, I headed up dance committees, captained sports teams and went to parties and gatherings every single weekend. As an adult, I've found ways to lead teams in my professional roles, even when I may not have had the title of a leader. I've joined local HOAs and looked into ways that I can contribute to my community on a personal level. It's in my nature to want to foster, join and create communities for people to identify with.

When I’m offered a free resource, a free call with a coach or a free webinar invite, I smash the button. I’m the person who’s always looking to absorb as much information as possible. And I’ll tell you what: by doing that for the last 3 years, and really for all my life, I’ve seen immense success and connectedness in my business.

The fashion industry doesn't have a lot of these opportunities though. Too many of us work tirelessly inside of our professional roles, inside big building walls, squeezed together with teams that we didn't choose, exhausted at the end of the day. The documentary hits on the point that it's very difficult to join additional communities and make time for events outside of work when we all work 50 to 60 hour weeks, non-stop. The fashion industry, for those of us who have been in it for long enough, we know that it is brutal. It is highly competitive. People are constantly vying for each other's jobs and better roles. We've seen mass layoffs in the last several years, and we are now all competing for the same scarce resources at salaries that don't make sense for rising inflation and our changing lives.

Here at Unmarked Street and The Business of Apparel, we have been searching for some sort of solution to offer you. And I'll admit that it's also some sort of solution for myself. I feel a little lost without a fashion community. It's burning within me to create something where those of us who love making apparel and want to see change within our industry can go to have discussions with each other, help each other, support each other and find answers to our issues that are currently missing in any other forum. We've opened Facebook groups, and we've had a few people join, which we love! But Facebook doesn't quite seem to be the right spot for our community. We've tried offering a series of office hours, where you can come be a part of a group, a cohort of like-minded individuals to help each other, support each other, and gain mentorship for me and my team. But a lot of this must look and feel very salesy, and even I struggle with how the delivery of this might feel against the intention of what we're really trying to do.

What I learned and what was articulated to me last night in this Netflix documentary was that communities are required to hold up the principles of our country's democracy while also helping people live their best lives. Inviting discussion, becoming a friend to someone who you wouldn't have normally befriended before, and opening our minds to new ideas is the type of thing that we are missing right now. A different documentary that I watched over a year ago also talks about areas of the world where people live to 100 years old or more. And one of the key things that all of those people have in common is community. They know their neighbors' names. They are members of groups. They are willing to lend a helping hand instead of looking the other way.?

So if both things are true, and proven: that we can help our communities and ourselves at the same time just by being willing to join a community, and get ourselves out of our own individualized bubbles on a regular basis, why do we see so much resistance? We wonder here at Unmarked Street on a daily basis how we can bring something like this into an industry that has traditionally always valued its silos. The sharing of information in how we do things, and the best practices and processes are often kept as secrets. It's been my mission for the last couple of years to share and reveal those secrets to you, but we are not reaching enough people.

We have a few ideas percolating. I learned last night about a resource called discourse where we can start a community conversation and group forum about our industry online. Something similar to Reddit, where a person could submit a question or a problem that they're having and others could chime in to help answer and give advice is what we're looking to build. This is honestly what we've been looking to build for some time now, but we haven't been able to pick up traction.?

Even as you are reading this, you've probably been hearing from me for a while now. Maybe you're receiving our weekly newsletters, or you've followed us on one of our social media channels. Inevitably, you've seen one of our posts guiding you to our online space at The Business of Apparel. So I want to hear from you now, what is holding you back? Is it the fact that we have a monthly fee for our community? Would you join if it was free? Or would you still hold back? If there were a monthly membership due, what would you be willing to pay? Clubs and memberships for decades have required monthly or annual dues, especially if they expect their leaders to provide resources, their time and organization of detailed meetings and information. But we do understand that people in our industry are perhaps unfamiliar with this type of structure. I'll admit that I didn't even know until the last year of my corporate career that there was such a thing as career coaches! There are so many resources out there and there are so many other industries who are taking advantage of groups, exterior classes, continued education, and expertise outside of their own company. The fact that this has never been taught to us or even relayed to us as an option is just yet another way that the fashion industry keeps us in our little bubble and inside our silos.

If you want to progress in your career, get a raise next year or a promotion, how do you expect to do that if you don't find new ways to learn about what's happening in the industry? What if you could access an entire community of people who can help you learn what you need to learn to get to the next level or simply to solve an issue that you and your team can't agree upon during any given week? Would that be valuable to you?

Perhaps I haven't been clear enough about my mission for the last 3 years. When I left my corporate role, I was making a fantastic salary. I had a 401k account, great benefits, and a career trajectory that looked so promising. I left all of that behind because I could see that there was too much information missing, and there was too little support in our industry for the people who needed it most. Startup brand owners who are trying to just hit six figures a year will not get there if they don't understand how the corporate side of our industry functions. Assistant and associate level professionals are lacking the management and mentorship that they need to learn business etiquette skills and the numbers side of our businesses. Fashion students have no idea what they're getting themselves into when they enter the workforce in our industry. I spent 20 years working at some very difficult brands, working for some very difficult managers, and pushing through some very difficult situations to learn this information on my own. It is now our company’s biggest mission to share our knowledge and all of this information with you. But you also have to be willing and wanting to learn this information yourself.

Throughout the remainder of 2024, we are going to try to experiment with a few different ideas. I'd like for you to keep an open mind about it. If we invite you to a free group, I highly encourage you to sign up and join. The community that you find yourself in might be exactly what you were looking for, not just for career support, but also to help you not feel so lonely in your own individualized role or personal life. The people who have joined our communities, taken our courses and become clients of ours have seen the impact that we are able to make on their success. We take their wins just as seriously, if not more seriously, as our own.

Join me in becoming a joiner. We will handle the content, the schedule, the learning, the information, and the support. All you need to do is make a little time to show up, and I wonder how your life might change by doing so? You can look at it as costing you an hour a week, or we can all start to embrace the fact that community is going to be the only way that we change our world, our country, our industry, and ourselves for the better.?

Learn more about our community by joining us this Friday at 1:30pm EST for a free workshop and a chance to get involved: https://www.thebusinessofapparel.com/secrets