Become invincible against negative colleagues ??

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Have you ever worked with someone who just exudes negativity? You know the type: The one who complains to anyone who’ll listen about their manager, their coworkers, their clients, and of course, how they’re treated unfairly.

I know what it’s like because in one particularly awful job *I* was the office complainer.?? A good friend and coworker finally said to me, "It's true it sucks here...but your complaining is making it worse." Oof! Talk about a teachable moment.

I may not have been as extreme as the example I gave you above, but I was negative enough that it impacted my work relationships.

Don’t underestimate the power of the workplace “Negative Nelly”. Having someone around who is a constant drain on positivity does more than just bring down the vibe in the office. Studies show that negative people impact their colleagues' job performance, increase frustration, and lessen employees' commitment to the organization.?

Now do you see why it’s so important to recognize and remove yourself from the negativity of others?

But I want to be clear, I’m not talking about occasional venting, everyone has bad days and needs to blow off steam once in a while. Nor am I saying we should be Pollyannas all the time.

I’m talking about intentionally choosing *not* to entertain water cooler gossip, the harsh criticism of others, the constant foreshadowing of worst-case scenarios, or any other behavior that brings down your morale.

If you have a coworker whose attitude can deflate even the most confident and upbeat people in your office and you don’t know what to do about it, then keep reading to learn how to “pass” on their negative behavior.

Quick Confidence Tips for Tuning Out Negativity at Work

1. Mindset: Set the example. Be aware of how often *you’re* the negative one at work and aim to have more positive daily interactions. This may take intentional action at first, but once you see how contagious positivity is, spreading good vibes will soon become second nature. To assist you in making this mental shift, try putting yourself on a “positivity diet”. That means bringing more things into your life that make you feel good. That might look like singing along loudly to your favorite tunes on your way to work, spending time with friends that uplift you or reading news from a "good news" website. For me, that’s listening to comedy podcasts during morning workouts and reading inspiring stories about people who have made bold moves in their lives. When you cultivate positivity and optimism, the easier it will be for you to set an example and feel protected against negative people.
2. Interpersonal: Challenge negativity: When you feel someone is being unnecessarily harsh about a person or situation, challenge them to look at things from a more positive (or balanced) standpoint. Offer additional information about the situation if you can. Doing this neutralizes the negative by offering a more balanced perspective.?Let’s say a colleague complains: “I’m certain the assistant manager position is going to go to Ron because he’s the office suck-up.” You could respond, “We don’t know what’s going to happen. We’ve all had a shot at applying and so we’ll just have to wait and see. And besides, Ron deserves it as much as anyone, especially since he took that course to acquire more skills for his position, and has been working on extra projects.” Challenging your colleagues’ negativity won’t necessarily convert them to your way of seeing things, but it helps you to keep your own peace of mind and build confidence to push back on negativity.?
3. Embodied: Protect your peace and walk away: The next time a colleague starts on a rant about your team, deliberately choose not to get sucked in. Some people are simply lost causes when it comes to indulging in negativity and so it’s not worth your time or energy to continue listening or get into a debate. Sometimes walking away is the most powerful move we can make in a negative situation.?So rather than subject yourself to a coworker's unconstructive tirade, tell the person you need to attend to a different task or simply say, “I prefer to focus on the positives of XYZ.” Protecting your optimism, positivity, and confidence by distancing yourself is an empowered choice that allows you to spend more time in the company of people you do appreciate.?

The bottom line is only *you* can decide how you want to think and feel. So don’t give that power to someone else by letting their negative talk bring you down.

I’d love to learn how you deal with the negative people in your office. Please share in the comments.

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