The Bear

Imagine you're lost in the woods, heart racing as you hear footsteps approach. But it’s not just any footsteps.It’s either a bear or a man. Which would you choose?

What surprised many wasn’t the question itself, but the overwhelming number of women opting for the bear. Many men, were baffled and outraged by what they saw as an absurd choice. For some, the conversation quickly escalated to long-standing gender stereotypes. The idea that women were making an irrational choice, fueled accusations of women being “too emotional” or “not smart enough” to see the real dangers of choosing a wild animal over a human.

Women took to addressing this by sarcastically mocking the logic of picking a bear, posting things like, "Sure, a bear won't mansplain to you," or "At least the bear doesn't ghost you after the first date." This trolling extended to exaggerated scenarios where the bear was painted as the "better" partner in every conceivable way, highlighting the ridiculousness of the situation.However ,for every troll or critic, there were people doubling down on their choice, presenting the bear as a metaphor for something deeper

Why the bear? It's not just about survival; it's about instinct versus intention, and in that choice, a deeper truth about fear emerges.The absurdity of choosing a bear over a man might seem obvious when we look at the statistics. If you were to face 100 bears, all 100 would maul you to death without any hesitation. But if you face 100 men, the chances of something unthinkable happening are lower.Maybe 10 out of 100 men might pose a threat. On the surface, this makes the choice of the bear seem irrational. But is it really that straightforward? Today, we know better than to rely solely on statistics. In a crowd of 100 men, how many are actually dangerous? Is it 10? 20? Maybe 5? There’s no real way to know. Perhaps 20 men in that group have behaved inappropriately or crossed boundaries , but if only five people have come forward, it’s easy to assume the rest of the crowd is safe. So while statistically, staying with the men might seem like the better choice, the real issue lies in the uncertainty. It’s this uncertainty, rather than raw numbers ,that drives many women to "choose the bear," as statistics alone don’t paint the full picture.

Me personally, I explained my choice of picking the bear by pointing out that if you encounter a bear, the worst that can happen is that you die. There is a finality to that. However, when facing a dangerous man, there are countless terrifying and traumatic things that could happen beyond just death. The uncertainty and fear of prolonged suffering or violation made the bear, to me, seem like the more straightforward and predictable option.

Men responded by challenging this idea, saying, “What if the bear mauls you, leaves you in agony, and you’re still alive?” Their point was that choosing a bear doesn’t necessarily guarantee an immediate end and could lead to prolonged suffering as well. This argument, however, overlooks a critical point about closure.

When facing a bear, even in the worst-case scenario of being attacked and left injured, there is a logical progression to the events. You were in the woods, you encountered a wild animal, and you couldn’t fend it off.There’s a clear cause and effect that is understandable, even if tragic. It’s something you can come to terms with because it follows a natural, albeit unfortunate, order of events.

However, when a person comes across a man with bad intentions and endures unspeakable things but survives, there’s often no way to make sense of it. The trauma feels senseless, with no clear reason why it had to happen. There’s no logic or justification, leaving survivors struggling to find closure. In my opinion, this lack of understanding and inability to reconcile what happened is what makes the choice between the bear and the man more than just about physical survival; it’s also about the psychological aftermath. Choosing the bear symbolizes choosing a threat that, while dangerous, at least follows a predictable and comprehensible pattern.

So,for the men outraged by women choosing the bear, it’s crucial to recognize that this choice stems from a history of trauma and vulnerability that many women face daily. It's also important to understand the nuance that this critique does not apply to all men. This isn't about vilifying men as a whole; rather, the bear serves as a metaphor for something deeper.