Balancing Money & Ego: 6 Questions to Help Control Your Spending

As a financial literacy coach, I often work with clients—many of them current or former athletes—who feel the pressure to maintain a certain image. Whether it’s driving the newest car, wearing the latest clothes, or living in a picture-perfect home, there’s often a tug-of-war between what looks good and what feels financially sustainable.

It’s something I call “living a lie”: when the outward appearance of success doesn’t align with what’s happening behind the scenes. And trust me, you’re not alone in feeling this way. The pressure to "keep up" is real, especially when you’ve been in the spotlight.

To help my clients build financial stability and confidence, I encourage them to ask themselves these six questions:

6 Questions to Check Your Ego and Take Control of Your Spending

1. Am I spending to meet my own needs, or to satisfy someone else’s expectations? Understanding why you’re spending can help you realign with what truly matters to you.
2. Am I buying things to impress others, or because they add real value to my life? Reflecting on this can help you direct your resources toward goals that bring lasting satisfaction—whether it’s saving, supporting loved ones, or investing in personal growth.
3. How can I be content with less? Often, the pursuit of luxury masks deeper insecurities. Shifting priorities toward relationships, experiences, and long-term goals can be far more fulfilling.
4. Why do I feel shame about budgeting or saying ‘no’ to things I can’t afford? Budgeting isn’t about lack—it’s about control. Setting boundaries and learning to say “no” is an empowering step toward financial freedom.
5. How can I reframe financial stability as a personal victory? Athletes thrive on discipline and goals, and managing your finances can feel just as rewarding as winning on the court. Celebrate milestones like paying off debt or hitting a savings goal—it’s a big deal!
6. What kind of legacy do I want to build? Thinking about the bigger picture can shift how you spend. Every dollar can become a building block toward something meaningful: financial freedom, giving back, or securing your family’s future.

When we take the time to answer these questions honestly, we can begin to let go of ego-driven spending and focus on creating a more meaningful relationship with our money.

Do any of these questions resonate with you? I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments!