Balancing Dreams and Decisions: My Journey with Egg Freezing

Let me warn you, this is going to be one of my longest articles so far. I hope you enjoy reading it.

Pause for a moment! If you find yourself wondering, "Should I be reading this? Is this a topic for public discussion?" then I ask you, what's the issue with it?

On the other hand, if you've bypassed those conventional thoughts, please proceed. And if you happen to be a woman aspiring to forge a career while desiring a family life, this is especially for you. Here's my story, and it's meant for everyone.

For a long time, I embraced the thought that solitude was my destined path, without the echoes of family life or the laughter of children filling my home. The warmth of adoption once flickered in my heart, yet as the seasons changed, it too dimly retreated into the shadows. I convinced myself that the essence of parenthood was absent from my soul. My dear friends would likely laugh at such a self-assessment, knowing well the tender bond I share with children and the profound love I hold for my cherished godson and goddaughter.

The advice I constantly heard about not having children seemed to be everywhere, and it started to influence my thinking. People would tell me I was better off without the burden, pointing to their own struggles as proof. I was so focused on their complaints that I almost missed the important part they all ended with: despite the challenges, they felt that parenting was the most rewarding part of their lives, worth every sleepless night. And in this process, I kept losing time believing something.

Along with these doubts in mind; in today's fast-paced world, the pursuit of a fulfilling career often takes center stage in our lives. For many, including myself, building a career has been a journey filled with passion, dedication, and countless hours of hard work. This journey, however, is not without its challenges and moments of doubt. The pressure to succeed, the fear of missing out on personal milestones, and the constant juggling of professional and personal aspirations can make decision-making incredibly tough. Not to mention some of the rebellious choices we make out of frustration of things not going the way you intended.?

When I first considered egg freezing, it was a decision deeply intertwined with my career ambitions I needed to focus on to safeguard my future. Our careers consume a significant portion of our life, often demanding our full attention and energy. As a result, doubts about the right time to start a family naturally arise. Should I slow down my career progression to focus on building a family, or should I continue to chase my professional dreams? These internal conflicts can be overwhelming at times.

However, I realized that focusing on my career and making other life choices doesn't have to come at the expense of my future personal plans. It's okay to prioritize your career and other aspirations while still taking steps to safeguard your future. Egg freezing, for me, became a form of insurance—a way to buy myself some time and peace of mind. It allowed me to continue pursuing my career goals without the added pressure of a ticking biological clock.

I recently remembered how a cherished friend, who has guided me on numerous occasions, suggested that I consider egg freezing since many years. Initially, my mind, clouded with skepticism about the whole concept, dismissed the idea. It wasn't until I spent the past 10+ months in quiet contemplation that I started to take it seriously.

I asked myself what truly brings me joy, and I realized it's the act of giving. My core nature is to nurture. My boundless affection for my godson and goddaughter isn't simply because they are my close friends' children. The truth is, they are more than that to me – they are individual little souls. They stir up a sense of parenthood within me, an instinct I had previously noticed but never fully acknowledged. Yet, through introspection, I've come to understand the depth and significance of these feelings.

Amidst all that was going on, a dear friend of mine echoed an idea that had been lurking in my mind. The future is a mystery, and who knows if we'll be the same people with the same perspectives tomorrow? In light of this, why leave room for regret? Coincidentally, I stumbled upon an interview with Jennifer Aniston. Back in 2005, she told hollywoodlife.com , "I've never in my life said I didn't want to have children. I did and I do and I will!" She admired women who balance successful careers with motherhood, questioning, "Why would I want to limit myself?"

Fast forward to 2022, in a conversation with BBC, she reflected with a hint of wistfulness, "I would've given anything if someone had said to me, 'Freeze your eggs. Do yourself a favor.' You just don't think it. So here I am today," she lamented, "The ship has sailed."

Her words resonated and made me wonder, am I making the right choices? Perhaps considering egg freezing isn't such a bad idea. It leaves the door open to motherhood, and adoption remains a heartfelt option for me.

To add to this, during a routine visit, my gynecologist suggested the same thing without any prompting from me. It felt like the universe was giving me a nudge, first gently, but now more insistently, with a warm smile. It was time.

I started the process on a priority basis. The lonely journey of egg freezing. Here being lonely doesn't mean I did not have any support – My family, friends, and close colleagues, all stood by me and supported my decision. Then what do I mean by lonely? I mean, it was all by myself that I visited doctors, went through multiple scans, blood tests, everyday multiple injections, and the procedure. Not to mention this was also my first visit to the OT. Now one may think, what is so hard about doing all this alone? Well, this comes with an extreme amount of motherhood emotions. The emotion that only a truly nurturing person or a mother would ever understand. You are constantly drowning in the pool of such emotions not just around but also within.

It is life-altering; you are doing something without any clarity of tomorrow, with a small light of hope in your heart that cuddles you to a warm smile and peaceful sleep at night.

Egg freezing is not just a medical procedure; it's a personal choice that empowers individuals to take control of their reproductive future. It offers a sense of security, knowing that you're taking proactive steps to keep your options open. It's about giving yourself the freedom to make decisions on your own terms, without feeling rushed or constrained by societal expectations.

Choosing to freeze my eggs was a decision that came after much contemplation and self-reflection. It was about finding a balance between my career aspirations and my desire for a family. It was about acknowledging that it's okay to take a step back and evaluate what's important to you at different stages of your life.

In conclusion, the decision to freeze your eggs is a deeply personal one, influenced by various factors, including your career. It's a choice that reflects the complex and multifaceted nature of modern life, where professional ambitions and personal dreams often intersect. By embracing egg freezing as a viable option, you can navigate these intersections with greater confidence and peace of mind, knowing that you are safeguarding your future while continuing to chase your dreams.

#womenintech #WIT #careergoals