Bad Days...What To Do???

We've all been there, we wake up expecting great things and do our normal morning routine to get ready, have breakfast, start our day and then BAM...just like that, the traffic is a mess, we get to our destination and what we planned to do, is interrupted by something that wasn't planned, we have a meeting at work or school that goes nothing like we hoped or expected, we get a text message that doesn't sit right, our kids text or call about a practice that we didn't plan for, our refrigerator quits working..... the list can go on and on and fill in the blanks with the most recent of events that made up your list of a "BAD DAY"

There are so many things that seem so big that really aren't big at all, it's all a matter of context for each of us, depending our our situation, circumstance and ability to handle "those days". Then there's big things, that are out of our control, that take our breath away, that we can't understand, comprehend, or imagine. When we feel helpless to even get up, do anything productive, and seem to overwhelm us. In talking with many people about the seemingly small and big things that cause a bad day, there were five things that were consistent in how to handle those bad days and turn them into something else.... the goal may not be to turn a bad day into a good day, depending on the severity of the issues going on, but the goal is to turn our focus into something that seemingly helps us get through and look beyond that moment, that day, that issue, that thing, that is having so much control over us.

Exercise/Move: Get away from the hustle, the thing, and get to moving. A walk at work, at home, on the treadmill, outside, wherever you can exert some energy and move. Moving helps our minds refocus, helps us to remove ourselves physically from that "place" and physically move.... metaphorically and really move. Moving makes us have a chemical reaction in our bodies and a physical reaction of breathing, exerting energy that is pent up, and clearing our mind to focus on what is important and what is needed for that next thing that helps us to feel like we are progressing

Pray/Meditate/Get Quiet: Connect with God, connect with the universe, shut off the noise. Get to a place that you can just be alone with your thoughts and pray about what you need. Ask for what you need, seek guidance for handling what is the here and now, and focus on that, not necessarily on what is next but just the very thing(s) that you have on your mind today. Ask for what you need and if you don't know what you need, just listen for direction and be in the quiet, to clear your mind and quiet your thoughts. Even for the most extroverted of us, this time is so important especially in a "bad day" situation.

Loving Critics: Have what I refer to as loving critics or a board of directors that you can go to for sound advice, open feedback, and honest discussion. This is not your parents/grandparents who think you walk on water (Loving- Non Critics). This is not the people that will find fault in anything you do (Non Loving- Critics). This group can be counted on to listen, while you share things that are going on with you and offer direction, advice, or better yet, just listen, depending on what you need. They are a group that has seen your best and worst and has stood the test of time. The one's that tell you the truth because they care and are in no competition with you and your life. Know who they are, use them to build your self awareness and seek them for trusted advice that you are willing to receive and act on, as needed, to improve a bad day as some of our bad days are a reflection of our own choices, in them.

Practice Gratitude/Help Others: It sounds oxymoron but the fact is, when we feel horrible, helping someone else feel good, will lift your spirits and most importantly it changes our focus. When we look beyond our day/situation/issue, and see others around us and a need and we can meet it, it does something in our heart to open it up more and see the bigger picture. Focusing on what we are grateful for, what we do have, rather than what we don't have, changes how we see our day. Buying a coffee for the person behind us, texting someone to tell them you appreciate them- these things that seem so small, can turn our focus from what isn't working, that day, to what IS working that day. The best way to help ourselves, is to help someone else.

This To Shall Pass: Remember in the moment, the situation, the day, this to shall pass. The sun will go down, the day will end, and God willing, the sun will come up and a new day arrives. We are quick to live in the moment and when the moment isn't what we planned/wanted, we get caught up in that and forget the bigger picture. Our thoughts go to the here and now, rather than the future. The future doesn't have to be in a month or a year, it can be tomorrow. What do you want to do different to have tomorrow be different than today? What do you have control over to do so? What can you learn from today that will be helpful for tomorrow's perspective? Don't make permanent decisions in temporary situations- tomorrow is coming for us to choose different.

We can't control the things that happen to us everyday, but we can control how we handle them, how we approach them, and how we choose to "live" in them- with our attitude!

Suzanne Combs Brown is the Owner of Kairos Culture (www.kairoscultureu.com), where she invests in personal and professional development with individuals, small groups, workshops and motivational speaking. With her 20 years of leadership and coaching in Corporate America and her dedication to continuous learning, Suzanne believes that we all have an opportunity to live our best lives and seeks to understand how each individual or group can grow, learn, and gain understanding to go beyond and move into a season of change.

Suzanne knows that God is her foundation and with Him all things are possible. She’s the wife to Robert Brown for 18 years. They have a blended family, with five children together along with three grand children. Their lives are busy, messy, comfortable, chaotic, exciting, and complicated, however, their priorities, possibilities, and balance, is theirs and that’s exactly how Suzanne looks at life. Each persons is unique to them and whatever your priorities, purpose, and goals, they are achievable!

Suzanne is the author to one book, “Girl You Got This” which is a daily journal with 52 weekly actions that take us through things we all have gone through and allow us to turn any situation, thought, or unkind word, and make it a growth and learning opportunities to know “Girl, You GotThis!”

For more information go to www.kairoscultureu.com or Facebook: Suzanne Combs Brown Kairos Culture or email to [email protected]