Baby Steps

-Latasha Thomas

This is one of my favorite pictures with my son when he was just four and a half months old. Sometimes when I start to doubt myself, or I become impatient about not getting the results I want as quickly as I want them I refer back to this picture.

When I found out I was pregnant with my son, my daughter was just one and a half years old and it was the summer before my final year of school. I was overjoyed and full of excitement at the thought of this new bundle of joy, but quite naive to the challenges a second diaper wearing dependent would have on my life and foreseeable plans.

Nevertheless I was determined to finish my degree so close to the finish line, that when it was time to start taking classes again in the fall I was just getting out of the morning sickness phase. The most difficult thing to get through the first months of pregnancy was the complete and utter exhaustion. I could have gone through a three month hibernation phase if I didn’t already have a toddler to take care of, I was teaching at the time and then there were those ordinary mundane tasks like taking care of the household, eating, and laundry… lots of laundry. And then after all that, late at night as everyone slept, I sat at my desk like a complete, crazed zombie woman trying to study psychological theories until my eyes crossed.

My son was due in January and six days after his due date I was doing jumping jacks, running up and down stairs, skipping steps trying to get my water to break. My son refused eviction. It was when I felt totally defeated, dreading the inducement of labor which was to be the next day’s fate, I lifted my daughter to bring her to bed and then it happened: not even three hours later he was born. 

That was in January and I still had four months to my final exams. Now I juggled a toddler, my new born, the household and I worked partially from home doing translations since I couldn’t teach for the time being. The last semester of school was a nightmare. Regrettably I saved all the classes I dreaded taking until the very end (like statistics, yikes). I had to call many a life lines to make it through some of my assignments. I wasn’t just sitting through normal class sessions but also having to sit with tutors as well. I was breastfeeding and my son refused to go to anyone but me. I slept at night with him cradled in my arms.

The day of my graduation I had to bring my son with me, because I was still breastfeeding and as mentioned, he never allowed me out of his sight for long. But the feeling of accomplishment was tremendous. I was so relieved and so happy. And this picture will forever be a reminder that things will not always be easy, but if I am persistent they are possible.