B2B Marketing Sucks. Punk Rock Is Here to Help.

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Oh, B2B marketing, how we love to hate you.

B2B marketing is the TSA of the marketing world; it's intrusive, bloated, wasteful, without legal justification, and has a consistent 95% failure rate.

Buckle up, folks. We're about to dive into the sick, sad world of B2B marketing mediocrity.

Why B2B Marketing Sucks So Much

It's kind of impressive how B2B marketing so often manages to suck any life and excitement out of what could be a fun and engaging process.

Let us count the ways:

1. Playing it safe: In a world that craves boldness and innovation, traditional B2B marketing clings to the safety of the status quo like a scared child clutching a teddy bear.
2. Bland branding: Generic logos, uninspired color schemes, and forgettable taglines are the norm, making it difficult to distinguish one brand from another. Yawn.
3. Say hello to Mr. Corporate: Traditional B2B marketing often hides behind a sterile, overly-professional facade that lacks authenticity and personality. Heaven forbid we let our human side show and connect with an audience of other, actual human beings.
4. One-size-fits-all: Why bother understanding your target audience's unique needs when you can just throw a blanket message at everyone and hope something sticks?
5. Dreadfully boring: Traditional B2B messaging can often be as dry as a desert and as dull as washing dishes, leaving customers bored and disengaged. It's like trying to read a technical manual written by someone who hates writing and wants you to be as miserable as they are.
6. Jargon-filled nightmares: You know what's a real crowd-pleaser? Industry jargon that makes your eyes glaze over. Seriously, who needs plain English when you can talk about "synergistic alignment" and "scalable solutions"?
7. "Risk-taking? LOL, no.": Many B2B marketers would rather play it safe than take a risk that might ruffle some feathers. But in today's world, being bold and daring can be the key to standing out. No one remembers the ones who played it safe.
8. "Embracing diversity? Umm...": Inclusivity? Equity? Accessibility? These are foreign concepts to many B2B companies. Instead, they often stick to the same old, tired formulas (read: boring shit created by homogeneous committees of old, white men), missing out on the rich tapestry of perspectives that can help drive innovation and growth.
9. "Let's just throw money at it!": The B2B marketing space is notorious for throwing cash at problems, hiring fancy agencies, and churning out cookie-cutter campaigns.
10. Lifeless stock photos: Nothing screams "We're a fun and relatable brand!" like a staged photo of business people shaking hands or staring at a laptop screen. It's like a visual representation of soul-crushing boredom.
11. Endless email blasts: Who doesn't love waking up to an inbox full of impersonal, generic marketing emails that make you feel like you're just another name on a list?
12. "Let's just be sales-y": Forget telling interesting stories or building engaged communities full of loyal brand advocates. Traditional B2B marketing prioritizes making an immediate sale, at any cost. Because who cares about repeat business or word-of-mouth referrals anyway?
13. "Not our problem": Social responsibility and sustainability? That's someone else's problem. Traditional B2B marketing often neglects the impact their business has on the world and fails to take responsibility for their actions.

Traditional B2B marketing: where creativity goes to die, "fun" is a 4-letter word, and social responsibility is optional.

But hey, at least they have those exciting stock photos of business people shaking hands, right?

While traditional B2B marketing may be fraught with mediocrity and missed opportunities, there is hope for those who dare to be different.

The Punk Rock Playbook for B2B Marketing

It's time we have some fun for a change, and explore how the principles of punk rock can inject some much-needed life, excitement, and authenticity into the world of B2B marketing.

How can we expect anyone to listen if we are using the same old voice? We need new noise. New art for real people! – New Noise, Refused

Pledging allegiance to a rigid creed or strict belief system is very un-punk rock.

However, what we can do is take inspiration from the values and ethos of punk rock to outline a set of principles that can guide us B2B marketers in our quest to break free from the shackles of traditional marketing, and start creating some cool shit that doesn't suck so much:

• Empathy above all: Connect with your audience on a deeper level by understanding their needs, desires, and pain points. Actually give a shit, and make empathy the cornerstone of every marketing decision you make.

In reality punk people are usually the gentlest, kindest folks you'll ever know. They're like hippies, only they wear way more black. ―?Kate Rockland

• Authenticity at the core: As trends come and go, stay true to the values and principles that define you. Let go of the need to present an image of squeaky-clean perfection. Transparency, honesty, and vulnerability are what make you human and relatable. Level with your audience to build trust and loyalty.

Embrace the honesty of imperfection and you will be unstoppable. ―?Alice Bag, The Bags

• Inclusivity matters: Champion diversity and create marketing campaigns that fully embrace and celebrate people from all walks of life. Stand up for the marginalized and the vulnerable, be an advocate for the underdogs, and ensure everything you do is inclusive, equitable, and accessible to all.

Punk has been portrayed as music by and for angry white males, but in its inception, it was a rebellion against all rock cliches. Gender, ethnic, sexual, and class taboos were all challenged by our early punk community and that is a story which is not very often told. People of color, queer folk, women – all were present from the very beginning of punk. – Alice Bag, The Bags

• Embrace non-conformity: Don’t try to blend in with the normies. Stand out by finding your unique point of view and embracing your inner freak, weirdo, or misfit. Find and connect with a tribe of like-minded individuals who are obsessed with the same niche interests you are and thrive in the company of fellow non-conformists.

I hate conformity. I hate people telling me what to do. It makes me want to smash things. So-called normal behavior patterns make me so bored, I could throw up!?– Wendy O. Williams, The Plasmatics

• Build a community: Foster a sense of belonging among your tribe by creating spaces where they can connect, engage, and share their experiences. Encourage collaboration and mutual aid. Cultivate relationships that go beyond transactions and turn your customers into loyal brand advocates.

One of the keystones of the music community, especially punk rock, is the ethos of taking care of one another. – Punk Rock Saves Lives

• Share your passion: Ignite a fire in your audience by sharing your passion and connecting with them on an emotional level through the power of storytelling. Align your brand with causes that matter to you and your tribe, and inspire your community to rally around your shared beliefs and values.

For me, punk is about real feelings. It's not about, "Yeah, I am a punk and I'm angry." That's a lot of crap. It's about loving the things that really matter: passion, heart and soul. – Joey Ramone, Ramones

• Dare to be bold: Embrace bold and controversial messaging, branding, and positioning that grab attention and set you apart. Take risks, break rules, make mistakes, and never apologize for who you are. Be fearless and provocative in your marketing approach, create a spectacle, and make sure they never forget your name.

People don't know how to be outrageous anymore. – Lemmy, Mot?rhead

• Subversion as strategy: Turn your industry upside down by challenging established norms, conventions, and expectations. Question authority and be unafraid to present fresh perspectives and new angles on familiar topics. Don’t forget to have fun. Embrace the power of humor, satire, and the unexpected to engage and delight your audience.

Questioning anything and everything, to me, is punk rock. – Henry Rollins, Black Flag

• DIY or die: Empower yourself by taking matters into your own hands and harnessing the power of DIY. Let constraints fuel your creativity, and prove that resourcefulness and determination can triumph over big budgets and fancy agencies. Embrace a scrappy mindset and make the most of whatever is available to you. Beg, borrow, and steal if it’s not.

Everything I do, writing, touring, traveling, it all comes from the punk and hardcore attitude, from that expression - from being open to try things but relying on yourself, taking what you have into the battle and making of it what you will, hoping you can figure it out as you go. – Henry Rollins, Black Flag

"But... I'm scared. Are you sure I won't get in trouble for this?"

If you're used to the safe, boring world of traditional B2B marketing, the excitement and thrill of this new approach might make you a bit nervous, at first.

It should.

Punk rock will never die, until something more dangerous replaces it. – Jello Biafra, Dead Kennedys

Embracing a punk rock mindset involves taking risks and challenging the status quo. However, it's important to remember that you can still do so in a responsible and ethical manner.

In fact, by prioritizing empathy, inclusivity, and social responsibility, you can create marketing campaigns that not only stand out, but also make a positive impact on the world.

Punk rock means?exemplary manners to your fellow human being. - Joe Strummer, The Clash

Surely you were joking when you said 'beg, borrow, and steal'... Right?

Using the phrase 'beg, borrow, and steal' was a tongue-in-cheek example of being "provocative".

Like this:

Art is theft. – Pablo Picasso

It doesn't mean engaging in actual theft or unethical behavior. "Theft" is just a metaphor for being resourceful, drawing inspiration from a wide range of sources, and combining existing ideas in creative, new ways.

Don't make the mistake of thinking you have to be a one-of-a-kind creative genius with completely unique and original ideas. The DIY ethic means everyone can do it — you just need to push the boundaries and think outside the box a little.

The punk rock ethos was, "Do it yourself". Anyone can do this. We're not sent from the heavens. – Michael Stipe, R.E.M.

Make sure to draw inspiration from things completely unrelated to your company, product, industry, or even "business" in general. By doing so, you can create original, memorable, and impactful marketing campaigns that truly resonate with your audience.

"What about professionalism?"

Professionalism is a crucial aspect of any business, but it's important to understand that being "professional" doesn't have to equate to generic, lifeless, boring marketing. At its core, professionalism is about honesty, integrity, loyalty, teamwork, adaptability, and hard work.

All of those things are very punk rock.

Remember, in B2B marketing, you are still marketing to human beings, not robots in suits. Human beings are attracted to authenticity, passion, and stories that resonate with them on an emotional level.

Taking a bold, human, and authentic approach may indeed risk turning some people off, but the alternative is far worse: no one cares about your message, no one pays attention to your brand, and your company fades away into obscurity to die a slow, quiet death.

It's also important to be clear about what you mean by "professionalism". Professionalism is often used as coded language for biased standards of dress and behavior that perpetuate discrimination and exclusion.

Professionalism is, by its provenance, a legacy of elites. White men of a certain class created what we now know as corporate America, so the norms of that still majority culture are what everybody else must assimilate themselves to if they want to move up in the world. Such customs include speaking in a white American dialect, concealing tattoos or piercings, and wearing the right thing, whether that's business suits or Patagonia vests. – Drake Baer, Business Insider

Ah, yes. Who can forget the iconic Patagonia "Power Vest"?

Nothing says "game-changing innovation" quite like a herd of Tech Bros in matching Power Vests and powder blue oxford shirts.

In many cases, the idea of "professionalism" or "professional presentation" can serve as a tool to discriminate against individuals based on their race, gender, or cultural background.

If that's what you mean by "professionalism", then maybe it's time to put down your Power Vest, rethink your definition, and embrace a more inclusive, equitable, and human-centered approach.

A punk rock approach to B2B marketing doesn't mean abandoning professionalism altogether. Instead, it means challenging the traditional norms of what it means to be "professional" and encouraging a more inclusive, diverse, equitable, and authentic representation of professionalism in the business world.

"Will it work for my particular company or industry?"

Startups and small businesses can benefit greatly from this approach, as they often lack the resources and budgets of larger companies, and they need to find creative ways to stand out and differentiate themselves from their competitors.

Additionally, companies that are trying to disrupt established players or introduce new products or services into the market can benefit from a punk rock approach. By challenging established norms, subverting expectations, and taking bold stances, these companies can capture the attention of customers and position themselves as innovators and thought leaders in their industry.

Ultimately, any company that wants to connect with their audience on a deeper level, build a strong community of loyal customers, and differentiate themselves from their competitors can benefit from taking a punk rock approach to their B2B marketing.

By adopting this approach, you can tap into the power of authenticity, empathy, inclusivity, non-conformity, community, passion, boldness, subversion, and the DIY ethic to connect with your target audience in a more meaningful way.

This can help you differentiate yourself from your competitors and build a loyal customer base, even if you don't have the resources of larger, more established companies.

"Ok, but... Am I cool enough to do this?"

Probably not. Who cares? Do it anyways.

The beauty of punk rock is that it's all about embracing your unique perspective, values, and personality. You don't need to be a certain age, have a certain look, or listen to a certain type of music to make this approach successful.

Just be yourself.

Punk is about being an individual and going against the grain and standing up and saying, "This is who I am". ―?Joey Ramone, Ramones

What matters is that you're willing to challenge the status quo, take risks, and be true to your beliefs, your values, and your audience.

Don't worry about being cool. Just be authentic, empathetic, and bold, and you'll be well on your way to creating some cool shit that doesn't suck. ??

Summary:

The Punk Rock Playbook for B2B Marketing:

1. Empathy: Understand and address the needs and desires of your audience.
2. Authenticity: Stay true to your brand’s values and principles.
3. Inclusivity: Embrace diversity and create marketing campaigns that champion marginalized voices.
4. Non-conformity: Stand out by embracing your unique perspective and finding your niche.
5. Community: Foster a sense of belonging and encourage collaboration among your audience.
6. Passion: Share your passion and connect emotionally through storytelling.
7. Boldness: Embrace risk-taking and make a lasting impression with your messaging.
8. Subversion: Challenge established norms and present fresh perspectives.
9. DIY Ethic: Be resourceful and creative with limited resources.

This approach is about embracing authenticity, empathy, and inclusivity while taking risks and challenging the status quo. It can help differentiate companies from competitors and build a loyal customer base, even without the resources of larger organizations.

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