Awkward greetings?

I come from a European family and have traveled and lived all over the world, so I've become accustomed to a wide variety of greetings, but that doesn't mean that some haven't been a bit on the awkward side.

We were taught at a young age how to deliver a proper handshake: thrust out your palm, thumb up, slide into the waiting palm of the person you're greeting, shake firmly and release. The firm handshake was not only a sign of confidence but also served to maintain "proper" physical distance between the two parties.

At home in Switzerland, we were taught to reach out and place our hands on the other person's shoulders, then deliver a small peck on each cheek. Somewhere along the way, it became three kisses, and for those that hadn't gotten notice of the change, occasionally got messy.

But during the last ten years, something shifted.

Meeting business prospects for the first time, I could thrust out my hand, only to have my arm buckled back as the person enveloped me in a bear hug.

"I'm a hugger!" I heard more often than not.

But, what if I'm not? (I am for the most part, but you see where I'm headed with this).

Most of us in the business world have developed a skill set to avoid those awkward greetings- whether it be the hug and release, keeping the uncomfortable physical contact as brief as possible, or the neck hug, designed to shift away from full frontal contact, or even the offensive side hug, the preemptive strike that leaves the control with the non-hugger. But, you've got to stay on your toes because you never know when someone's going to change the game.

In a fairly litigious world in which sexual contact is strictly forbidden in the workplace, you won't see much kissing going on when people meet one another, even if it's culturally appropriate.

But, not all meetings occur in the office, and the rules seem to blur some when those four walls are left behind.

I'd like to think that we can be empowered enough to voice our boundaries but what if there are times when you want to be more diplomatic and "open"? What if you'd like to be that guy who wants to be capable of a quick hug (even if it makes your skin crawl) as you enter the boardroom? But, what if, as a professional woman, you'd really rather not have male team members kiss you (even on the cheek) as a form of greeting?

I know what you're thinking: that fist bump is really going to come in handy.

But, what if, like me and millions of others, you've got arthritis in your hands and the fist bump would send you over the top?

Where is the peaceful balance between wanting to extend a warm greeting and breaching physical, emotional and cultural boundaries (by delivering or refusing to deliver the greeting)?

Those of us in the healing arts often press our palms together and bow our head slightly as a sign of compassion and respect but this could feel awkward if you've never extended such a greeting before.

In smaller villages in Mexico and South America, people greet one another by placing a hand on the other's opposite shoulder, then grip the forearm before sliding the palm into handshake. That generally works as long as you know what you're doing.

And, in several aboriginal cultures, men greet one another by cupping each other's genitals.

I think we can all agree that the latter just isn't going to work in the US business world.

So, perhaps we could work on just a few simple guidelines to avoid the awkward greeting:

1. Know yourself and what you're comfortable with.
2. Know the cultural norms of the folks you're meeting - whether you're in a small village in Africa or walking into Google corporate.
3. Be present to the circumstances for the meeting- formal vs. informal, business vs. pleasure, new contacts vs. old friends
4. Observe how others are interacting if you can- advance intel is everything!
5. Take a deep breath, exude confidence, and be the very best version of yourself. Even if the greeting is a bit stiff or way too sloppy, you'll carry it off brilliantly!

Dr. Sage Breslin is a Transformation Coach & Psychologist who works primarily with entrepreneurs, leaders and influencers. She is the best-selling author of five books, the most recent of which is Breaking Through: The Conscious Leader's and Entrepreneur's Guide to Amplify Intuition, Clarity, Vision, Motivation and Productivity and is available through Amazon in Kindle and paperback versions.