Awareness + Compassion + Inspiration

emotionally intelligent leadership

It's the ability to move people in the direction you want to go based on a deep understanding of yourself and them. First comes you: gradually improving your self-awareness and self-management skills. Then comes others: gradually building your social awareness and relationship management skills. It's a simple formula but a difficult journey. And it doesn't matter how emotionally intelligent you currently are. What matters is how emotionally intelligent you can be.

emotional intelligence tips

1. To help build your emotional awareness, draw a horizontal line on paper, ask yourself, "Am I above the line or below the line?" and then map where you are. Above the line is when you're feeling positive: you're open, curious, approachable, inviting. Below the line is when you're negative: closed, defensive, uninterested. Try this on a daily basis.
2. Breathe. It's the simplest way to get emotionally regulated, balanced, and centered. Just 1-2 minutes of conscious breathing can lower your heart rate. Try it.
3. The key to empathy is deep listening. The key to that is paying attention. And the key to that is avoiding distractions. In person, make healthy eye contact, square up with the other person, and watch their non-verbals. With video calls, go full screen, silence your phone, mute notifications, and sit in a quiet space. You'll reduce distractions, pay better attention, and build greater empathy.

featured building blocks + more tips

emotions. Your emotional awareness consists of three things: the ability to recognize specific emotions you're feeling, why, and the impact they have on you and others. TIP: the next time you label your emotions, ask yourself why you're experiencing them and how long they've been with you.

achievement. Your achievement orientation is defined by how you're motivated, and your resulting ability to set and pursue challenging goals. TIP: learn about Human Motivation Theory, pick one of the three motivators you most identify with, and use that insight to explore how you can become more achievement-oriented.

compassion. It's empathy plus action: your capacity to understand another's suffering or distress, and then do something to help alleviate it. TIP: avoid asking, "What can I do?" when someone is suffering. Instead, rely on your intuition and knowledge of them to simply offer your help with something specific.

inspiration. The most complex leadership skill, it's the ability to unlock another's motivation so they move in the direction you want to go. TIP: lean hard into your strengths. A landmark study on inspirational leadership found that followers are most inspired by leaders who do 1-2 things really well.?

Why are the four levels of emotionally intelligent leadership (self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, relationship management) in the order they are in the graphic above? Because it's essential to increase your ability to lead yourself before leading others.

Know an executive or team that can benefit from emotionally intelligent coaching or training? Reach out to learn more.

your brain + body

Oxytocin is the "trust" hormone, released into your bloodstream when you have highly positive interactions with other human beings.

It's one of the four affectionately named "happy chemicals," neurotransmitters and hormones that improve your mood, calmness, and sleep in the short term. In the long run, continuous oxytocin flows can help your well-being, forward progress, and overall health.?

How can you intentionally boost oxytocin levels to achieve these outcomes and experience more positive emotions? Making new friends, spending time with your favorite people, having deep conversations, experiencing physical touch, and expressing gratitude to others.

got an EI question?

If you have a burning question about emotionally intelligent leadership, or how to make leaders (including yourself) better at who they are and what they do, ask us!?We'll do our best to answer it in an upcoming newsletter.