Avoiding the inevitable? Learn how to handle tough conversations like a pro.

By Melissia Melendez

You know you have a tough conversation coming up with a member of your team. What’s your reaction? Dread? Procrastination? Maybe even avoiding it all together?

High stakes conversations naturally make us nervous so it’s normal for your initial reaction to be “hurry up and get it over with,” and put it behind you as soon as possible. But doing this short changes your opportunity to provide valuable guidance to your team member. It also can rob you of an opportunity to become a better leader.?

My #1 recommendation? Don't be afraid to create talking points to keep the conversation on track. This can help you remember to cover specific items important to both you and your team member, ensuring a productive and focused discussion. You’ll also feel more comfortable during the conversation because you took the time to prepare.

Using the points below, walk through the situation you plan to discuss. This helps you get your thoughts organized. Talking points can then be prepared more easily.

Define the Issue Clearly

• Be specific about the problem. Avoid vague or general statements both in the planning of the conversation and the delivery. *If you can’t clearly articulate what the issue is, how can you expect your team member to understand it and make improvements?
• Use concrete examples to illustrate your point. Write out how you expect them to handle similar situations in the future so you’re prepared to communicate this to them more clearly.

Set Clear Goals

• What do you hope to achieve from the conversation? Hint - your goal should not be to punish the employee but rather help to guide them.
• Be realistic about your expectations.

Prepare to Understand the Other Person's Perspective

• As you’re thinking through the issue, try to see the situation from their point of view.
• Anticipate their potential reactions and responses.
• Is there something you could do better to help support them? Make a note in your talking points to ask your team member this question.

Consider Possible Outcomes

• Think about potential outcomes of the conversation.
• Develop a plan for each possible scenario.

Effective communication is a cornerstone of leadership. By investing time in preparation and following these steps, you’ll be better equipped to handle tough conversations with confidence and empathy, fostering growth and trust within your team.

Share your tips for handling difficult conversations in the comments.?

Want support to master these conversation techniques? Let’s connect to discuss how I can help!