Avoid the "I have to..." Trap!!!

Success… defined by our dreams, and our desired lifestyle as People, Partners, Parents, and Professionals… are all found in our language. We have the ability to speak our dreams into success when we intentionally chose the proper language, influence our proper daily action, and maintain an EVOLVED mindset… but it all starts with the language we choose to fill our day, our space, and our relationships at home and at work! In a society where we often value “Busy” over “Better”, one phrase stands out as a major culprit of stress and personal burn-out… “I have to…”.

The phrase “I have to…” is said by the millions of people so busy at work and at home… it’s said as we’re looking at the time, our minds going a mile per minute, stressed making list, and crossing off all the things we “HAVE TO” do! Although the tasks may get done… isn’t it also about HOW it gets done? The manner, the attitude, and the effort of how it gets done? You cooked dinner for your family… but rushed through it with gritted teeth and frustration exuding out of your pores! You took your kids to their little league practice, but didn’t even talk to them as you rushed about, answered calls, or was looking at your phone the entire time. You got that project done at work, but were stressed to the max… all the while forgetting to enjoy the process or celebrate the wins, successes, and life in general and then on to the next task, project, or “Have To”! Enough is enough! Yes… These tasks are a part of the life you chose… unless you are planning to chose another… which will have its own set of different tasks… Let’s do something different and EVOLVE!!!

Every time you catch yourself saying “I have to…”… do yourself and your relationships a favor and think “I get to…”. Yes… I know it sounds crazy! However, this process over time multiplied by the simplicity of changing our language will EVOLVE your life, your relationships, and YOU! Years ago, I chose to live in my chosen Positives and Negatives; enjoying and celebrating the positives and understanding and managing the negatives. Our negatives are two-fold. Whatever the negatives of your job, relationships, and life… negatives breakdown in two parts; what you can control and what you can’t. The parts you can control … do something about! The parts you can’t… it sucks and let it go until maybe one day you can… in the meantime… just live right; by smiling, doing, and being your best!

“I get to…” sounds a lot better to you mind, your heart, and your life than “I have to…” I get to go home to my wife, husband, family. I get to take my kids to practice. I get to go to work today. I get to complete this project at my job. I know its hard and may be weird to be positive all the time… but the truth is… what’s the alternative? And remember, no matter your situation… there are at least a million people out there right now that would be willing to trade places with you… go home to YOUR home… to a family… to YOUR husband, wife, boyfriend, or girlfriend, to YOUR job, and have YOUR life! You GET to do it and live it… So, let’s appreciate it, honor it, and live the heck out of it!!!

Yes… there are irritating and hard times in life, relationships, and our jobs. To work through and pass them… we must learn how to vent. Here’s the You Evolving Now way… your venting is people limited and time limited; out venting is not for everyone that will listen and not to be discussed ALL DAY LONG! Venting is a process to release, move on, fix, and EVOLVE! Not, simply to share, get people on our side, sulk, and regress. Enjoy your “Get to”, Evolve your venting, and enjoy your EVOLUTION!!!

Download the You Evolving Now App (YEN Push) today for your daily EVOLUTION!!!

written by: Andre Young