Autism Parents: IEP Negotiation Tips

Summer is a good time to think about the dreaded IEP meeting strategy. I'm a couple of years into this Autism thing, and although still learning (which will never end), I want to give you some strategy when negotiating an IEP.

1) Drop the "Me and My Kid" against "Them" mentality. Overall, the system sucks. It's just so imperfect, but you have to remember that it also sucks for many teachers and support staff. There just isn't enough funding. Myself, and many others, have been working on that with Policy makers and School Boards. Realize that the structure is weak, instead of blaming everyone who is a part of the recipe.

2) Use REFLECTIVE strategies. People love to feel good, or consumed with themselves. I used this tactic for years when I was hosting radio shows. The consultants would ask me "Why do you repeat the ending of what the caller says sometimes?" I'd say because it shows "buy-in"... the more interested I am, the more interest they feel about talking. The secret weapon is to keep them talking. Example: Teacher: "I really love my job but it's hard because I have 30 special needs kids.".... Your Response: "30 ..Special Needs.. Kids...??" This makes your audience excited that what they're saying is interesting.

3) We, Us. If you truly believe that your kids' Special Needs educators are part of the parternship to help your child, then talk like it. "You" or "You guys" puts them in a defensive posture. Everyone else is going to refer to them like that. Be the difference. Example: "What we did last year needs improvement", or "I'd like us to reach successful outcomes"...

4) My longtime media agent, Norm Schrutt, taught me about re-phrasing questions toward the negative. This isn't being negative, it's getting your audience to deny something with passion or emphasis. EXAMPLE: Instead of saying "Is it hard to get approval for an ABA therapist to come in?", Rephrase as "Are you against an ABA being involved?" Let your audience feel the "control" of saying "No", even though saying "No" (in this case) is a positive for your cause. Re-wire what "No" actually means in this context.

Feel free to message me for other concepts. I won't overload you right now because these things take time to perfect. Also, do a mock convo several times to get sharp. I spend time in the shower creating certain phrases, or questions. The other day I sat at the beach and wrote down over 40 possible responses to my questions, then put together my strategy of push-back, for each. This takes prep. It's not easy. But, look what's on the line? It's important.

-Marc (404) 275-8301