August is the worst month, but which is the best?

It's that month again—the worst month of the year. August. Now, I understand that phrase might come off weird to some of you. But I mean it. I did the math the other day.

So, below I'm going to show my work (with a nod to the original 2018 rankings I published, included as well). I don't want to spoil anything for you, but the worst month is still... August.

It's a pretty silly list so don't take it seriously, but it's also extremely serious, and absolutely, positively, and perfectly correct. So, If you wanna argue, I have my entire afternoon blocked off and my notifications are turned on.

#12 AUGUST (Original ranking: 12)

• Still hot as hell outside, and its time to start school, which means rush hour traffic again. And to top it all off, let's be honest; the only thing worse than not having any NFL football is preseason NFL football. August, is still a very bad month. 0/10, many notes.

#11 APRIL (Original ranking: 10)

• The weather warms up a bit, albeit with rain, taxes, and Easter suits? Eh, we can do better. Baseball opening day is a nice-to-have here, though, and many consider this the unofficial kickoff month of the summer music festival season, which are certainly positives.

#10 JUNE (Original ranking: 5)

• School's out, and traffic takes a much-needed exhale. Juneteenth and Father's Day always pack a good one-two punch, and we get the NBA Finals, but dat about it. June is a sneaky-lame month.

#9 JANUARY (Original ranking: 11)

• It's the new year, which is fun... but following through with your New Year's resolutions? Well, that's no fun. The days are short as hell, and we're all hungover and fat (see December, far below) .... but at least we have both the NFL and college football playoffs. Still leaves me just a little cold though, hbu?

#8 JULY (Original ranking: 8)

• Family reunion, anyone? Fireworks? Essence Fest? MLB All-Star game? NBA free agency? My birthday! I mean, it's not nothin', but that's really all I can say about July. Viva la summer!

#7 MAY (Original ranking: 4)

• The first of the summer-ass-holidays-with-long-weekends arrives with Memorial Day, which everyone loves. We get to celebrity watch at the MET Gala on the first Monday of this month, too... and then make all the Mamas feel special that following Sunday. Oh, and weddings start happening, which are always a treat. Solid month.

#6 NOVEMBER (Original ranking: 9)

• Daylight Savings Time is over, and the days are shorter, which sort of sucks, but you can officially pull out your boots and jackets, put the lawnmowers away, and preheat that oven for Thanksgiving. November ain't never hurt nobody. Put some respect on it. Who's making the mac-n-cheese this year, btw?

#5 MARCH (Original ranking: 7)

• St. Patty's Day is cool and all, but let's be honest - we're here for the NCAA tournaments, The Oscars, and the arrival of the most universally anticipated season on the calendar: Spring. Yes, March is where hope springs eternal.

#4 DECEMBER (Original ranking: 6)

• Holiday Season simply can't be beaten - Christmas music, Kwanzaa principles, Hanukkah love, and New Year's Eve eve-ing. You know what that means? Er'body in this b***h getting tipsy! For like 2 weeks straight, and hopefully somewhere near family and friends. Take this time to reflect and show thanks for the year that was.

#3 SEPTEMBER (Original ranking: 3)

• The Fall season (both on the TV and in the Outdoors) begins "officially" at the equinox, and the NFL season finally starts, which is like a holiday within itself. Also, there's Labor Day which for some isn't just the last time they'll wear white, but the last time they'll really fire up the grill for the year, so this is huge. Most importantly, September is how you know August is over.

#2 OCTOBER (Original ranking: 1)

• Homecoming season is here! Football is in full swing, NBA basketball is just getting started and baseball has officially gotten really good. The trees are literally every shade, and we get to cosplay for candy? Say word, son.

#1 FEBRUARY (Original ranking: 2)

• It's not the size of the month in the party; but rather the size of the party in the month. NBA All-Star game, Super Bowl, The Grammy's, Valentine's Day, Mardi Gras AND Black History Month?! My only note is that I sorta kinda wish it was longer, and guess what - every 4th year that happens, too. LOL. February grants all of our wishes. Thank you, God, for February.

For Lack of a Wetter Bird, February is the best month.