Attention Seeking Addiction - How to Break Free from the Need to Impress and Show-off

Beyond the Fa?ade Unmasking the Show-Off - Psychology of Attention-Seeking Behavior -Understanding and Addressing Attention-Seeking Behaviors

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In this article you will learn the following

-What is Show-off or Attention Seeking Behavior

-Why & Who Show-off or use Attention Seeking Behavior

-24 Tips for How to overcome the Attention-Seeking Behavior and need to show-off

-48 Signs, Traits & Symptoms of People who show-off or indulge in attention-seeking behaviors or histrionic personality disorder

-10 Sample Causes of histrionic personality disorder

-10 Tips & Therapy to Manage and Treat Histrionic Personality Disorder

-10 Other Mental Health Disorders Which Can Trigger Show-off and attention-seeking Behaviors

-10 Signs of Borderline Personality Disorder BPD

-30 Sample Signs & Symptoms of NPD – the Narcissistic Personality Disorder

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The origin of show-off or attention-seeking behavior is deep-rooted emotional-financial-social and other insecurities.

There are businessmen whose business is struggling BUT spend to maintain a Richy-rich class lifestyle of - most luxury cars, private planes, branded bags, exclusive clothes, expensive vacations, etc. - to make others believe that they are doing very well.

People show-off their intellect – by talking about the books they have read or their education degrees.

Now -Should a person be judged for driving a Rolls Royce or flying in his Gulfstream jet – well if this person has acquired the financial levels to live and maintain this lifestyle – it is their choice.

Then there are people like Warren Buffet or Bill Gates – who live a relatively simple and humble life – again it is their choice.

BUT if you are in debt and you are taking bank-loans – just to show-off TO OTHERS to impress by projecting how rich or important or successful you are – then it is certainly an issue you need to address immediately.

In India recently – there was a vulgar display of wealth by one of the richest persons in Asia in a wedding – although they have not done much for the society AND a large portion their wealth is acquired through unethical and downright criminal ways – I don’t know why they flaunted their wealth in so ostentatious manner - when there was no need to prove anything for them.

There is another businessman of India – who is equally rich and have become rich through ill-gotten ways BUT he so far is only focused on quietly acquiring through political and bureaucratic patronage, assistance and protection AND is creating wealth without showoff. Neither of them are saints by any parameter.

In a few Western cultures - people value equality in society- BUT in some Asian cultures – people especially the affluent class want to have a hierarchical social order based especially on wealth, power and social position.

People who show-off - have a very fragile and low - self-worth, self-esteem, self-proudness and self-confidence.

Most of the people who show-off - feel very uncomfortable with themselves and their weaknesses, their lacunae and their faults.

People who show-off are habitually driven by the feelings of shame, of being inadequate and of being inferior to others.

As a result, they develop a compulsive need for - attention, validation, recognition, admiration, appreciation, acceptance –from others.

They also want to look and feel important.

And because they can’t get all those needs filled through positive, empowering and growth-oriented ways - they resort to all kinds of tricks and means – to superficially acquire these feelings.

The real achievers who have accomplished great things – don’t show-off – as their inners self feels fulfilled because they have acted to rightfully acquire all the great things that they have.

Most of the highly accomplished people let their results do the talking.

If you are sharing your authentic accomplishments as a part of the conversation and are proud of them – it is perfectly alright.

But if you are trying to create the impression of something which you never did or of someone who you are not – and you are doing only to get attention – then it becomes very unresourceful and disempowering for you in the long run.

In any case – people can see through your fa?ade – maybe not immediately but sooner or later.

That’s why the people who show-off – don’t have real friends – they have people who need something from them – and to get what they want – flatter the people who show-off.

This disorder creates a vicious cycle in making you live a non-genuine life because you can never feel authentic – fulfillment, satisfaction, worthiness, comfortable, proud – in a real sense as your subconscious as well as conscious knows that you are a phony and fake.

Exaggerated life is a distorted method of ego satisfaction.

Being obsessed with showing off is a pathological defense mechanism for people who show-off.

Driven by their need for external validation – people may buy things that they don’t need to show off their possessions, spend money at the cost of something essential when they can’t afford what they are buying, create fake-stories of great heroism – just so that they are admired, revered and accepted by others.

You will find people posting selfies, photos of vacations, or making claims of achievements that have no basis and those can be discovered as false – even at casual scrutiny.

The rise of social media platforms has created a massive outlet for these emotionally insecure people to create an illusionary world for themselves – through photoshoot to show a perfect flawless super man or woman.

But what it does in reality – it makes all these people suffer from further inferiority and FOMO the fear of missing out – when they see others posting their grandiose feats of achievement and happiness and success.

Then they feel compelled to post an even bigger event and the rat-race to psychological doom and depression begins.

Many people’s lives depend on the number of likes and number of followers they have.

And to get validation and attention - they can go to any extent – even by paying money to get likes and false followers by fabricating events in their lives.

FOMO makes them feel distressed when they see others experiencing something better AND what all they are missing out on – triggering worry of being left behind.

So, they put even more effort in their social media accounts in the - Instagram, Twitter, WhatsApp, YouTube and Facebook. Read my article on FOMO.

Because these people have developed a chronic habit of comparing themselves with others – they are constantly connected with the social media through their phones to check very frequently to see how their rivals are doing and what parties and activities they are attending.

Then to project themselves as superior to others – they may start attending more activities and pushing themselves for burnout.

When people compare themselves with others – it is always irrational comparison as it would invariably between their weaknesses with other’s strengths.

These people only see the final success of others and NOT what others have done to reach that level.

Because of the societal pressure to be successful – these emotionally insecure people – base their happiness, their success, their satisfaction, their feeling beautiful OR whatever that they desire – on elements which are no in their control – resulting into further erosion in their - self-worth, self-esteem, self-proudness and self-confidence.

The people who show-off doesn’t realize that their Flaunting of Wealth & Status only makes them seem like a wannabe AND NOT a CLASSY person - as their eagerness to Show Their Faux Wealth seems sick and tasteless.

Psychology defines this show-off as histrionic (dramatic or theatrical) personality disorder – which is marked by intense, unstable emotions and a distorted self-image - where their self-esteem depends on the approval of others and doesn’t come from a true feeling of self-worth.

People with histrionic personality disorder have an overwhelming desire to be noticed and often behave dramatically or inappropriately to get attention without being aware of their erratic & problematic behavior.

People who are close to criticism continue to make mistakes.

People can get affected by Histrionic personality disorder from their late teens or early 20s.

People who are culturally deficient - become arrogant and impolite if they gain too much wealth suddenly.

48 Signs, Traits & Symptoms of People who show-off or indulge in attention-seeking behaviors or histrionic personality disorder

1.?? ?Display of excessive, superficial emotionality AND paradoxically rapidly shifting shallow emotions

2.?? ?Frequent problems at work and in social and in romantic relationships

3.?? ?Feel underappreciated or depressed when they are not the center of attention

4.?? ?May embarrass friends and family in public by being overly dramatic

5.?? ?Being persistently flirtatious Act inappropriately sexual with most of the people they meet – even when those people are not attracted towards them

6.?? ?May display Seductive or provocative behavior

7.?? ?Be overly concerned with their physical appearance - Use their physical appearance to draw attention to themselves by wearing bright-colored or revealing clothing

8.?? ?Express strong opinions without facts or details to support their opinions

9.?? ?Gullible to the extent of getting easily influenced by the people they admire

10.??????????????? ?Assume that their relationships with others are closer than they usually are

11.??????????????? ?Have difficulty maintaining relationships

12.??????????????? ?May come out as fake or shallow in their interactions with others

13.??????????????? ?Need instant gratification - may lack Impulse control as well as lack self-control

14.??????????????? ?Become bored or frustrated very easily

15.??????????????? ?Constantly seek reassurance and approval.

16.??????????????? ?May lack awareness of their behaviors and its impact on their relationships

17.??????????????? ?Would feel Uncomfortable when not the center of attention

18.??????????????? ?May develop depression and substance use disorders – like use of cannabis or alcohol ?

19.??????????????? ?Feel excessively distressed about a physical symptom they have - may also have abnormal thoughts, feelings and behaviors in response to their symptoms

20.??????????????? ?May experience panic attack with feelings of fear - in response to ordinary, nonthreatening situations

21.??????????????? ?They may believe that a part of their brain and body & nervous system isn't functioning when there's no evidence of structural damage

22.??????????????? ?May have or announce frequent suicidal threats and gestures

23.??????????????? ?Paradoxically they may not necessarily enjoy all these attention-seeking behaviors

24.??????????????? ?Some of them may get overwhelmed or confused when getting too much affection too soon and reject them instead of reciprocating their advances– from them when they attempt to quickly get closer or more intimate with others

25.??????????????? ?They may have frequent friction in their relationships with other people

26.??????????????? ?They make up or exaggerate stories about things to impress others

27.??????????????? ?They make up or exaggerate the symptoms of an illness

28.??????????????? ?They may shower compliments and love to people they have just met ?

29.??????????????? ?They may get into minor accidents that require other people to rescue them

30.??????????????? ?They may try one upmanship with others to prove that they are superior to others

24 Tips for How to overcome the Attention-Seeking Behavior and need to show-off

1.?? ?Please understand that any compulsive obsession with acquiring materialistic possessions – will make you under pressure all the time because you will never feel satisfied with what you have

2.??? ?To counter this obsession for say – Power, Position, Wealth, Name/Fame/Popularity - you need to work on many fronts to strengthen your - self-love, self-acceptance, self-worth, self-esteem, self-proudness and self-confidence

3.?? ?Understand the roles and importance and differentiation between Means-Values and End-Values - End-Values are those which gives you sustainable and empowering fulfillment like – having wonderful relationships with people important to you, real intimacy and love, helping others achieve their through potential, ensuring a fantastic emotional, physical & mental health and fitness. Means-Values are the means to add value to your End-Values and are like – professional success, acquiring and creating wealth, becoming a leader etc.

4.?? ?Identify what you want to do, be and have [for have – focus on only non-materialistic personal qualities – yes all of us need basic comfort that is why means-values helps us acquire them]

5.?? ?Identify your dreams – ask yourself if you can do anything – where would you see yourself in next 5,10,15,20 years and so on

6.??? ?Work backwards and create actions which are daily, weekly, monthly, yearly

7.?? ?Identify what resources you have and what resources you need

8.?? ?Identify what skills, education, knowledge, exposure, experience and expertise you already have AND what you need to acquire to achieve your big picture

9.?? ?Create a schedule to fit in all the daily actions you must take on that day – which covers all the above points

10.??????????????? ?Monitor and track your progress

11.??????????????? ?In case you get stuck – use creativity to improvise till you achieve what you want OR overcome what was stopping you

12.??????????????? ?Learn to take risk – in the areas you know can give you breakthrough progress

10 Sample Causes of histrionic personality disorder

1.?? ?Personality disorders - especially histrionic personality disorder, are among the least understood mental health conditions.

2.?? ?Histrionic personality disorder may have Genetic causes as they tend to run in families

3.?? ?It can also get imbibed in the personality when the person is not criticized or punished as a?child – even when they made big mistakes

4.?? ?When they got positive feedback from their parents only when they show certain behaviors that they approve of?

5.?? ?When they got - Inconsistent, unpredictable attention from their parents?

6.?? ?When they felt confused about what behaviors will get approval from parents?

7.?? ?Childhood trauma - such as child abuse or the death of a family member

8.?? ?Their difficult and complex - past Relationships & work history

9.?? ?Experienced parenting styles that lacked boundaries – when their parents were either over-indulgent or inconsistent

10.??????????????? ?They had parents who display dramatic, erratic, volatile or inappropriate sexual behavior

10 Tips & Therapy to Manage and Treat Histrionic Personality Disorder

1.?? ?As with all mental health conditions, seeking help as soon as symptoms appear can help decrease the disruptions to your life

2.?? ?The family members of people with histrionic personality disorder often experience stress, depression, grief and isolation

3.?? ?Personality disorders, including histrionic personality disorder, can be difficult to diagnose since most people with a personality disorder don’t think there’s a problem with their behavior or way of thinking.

4.?? ?In most cases, people with histrionic personality disorder (HPD) don’t believe their behaviors are problematic.

5.?? ?They also tend to exaggerate their feelings and dislike routine, which makes following a treatment plan difficult.

6.?? ?However, they might seek help if depression — possibly associated with a loss or a failed relationship — or another problem caused by their thinking and behavior causes them distress.

7.?? ?CBT Cognitive Behavior Psychotherapy (talk therapy) - The goal of treatment is to help the person with HPD see their own irrational behavior reflected and uncover their motivations and fears associated with their thoughts - to relate to others more positively. Through CBT, you can unlearn patterns of negative thoughts and behaviors and learn to adopt healthier thinking patterns and habits

8.?? ?Group psychotherapy in which a group of people meets to describe and discuss their problems together under the supervision of a therapist or psychologist

9.?? ?Psychodynamic psychotherapy- happens through initially guided and later self-administered - self-reflection and self-examination – to identify problematic relationship patterns in their life

10.??????????????? ?Supportive psychotherapy - This type of therapy involves the examination of relationships and patterns of emotional response or behavior

Read the remaining article as per the following details

This article was originally published as “48 Reasons Why People Show-off 24 Tips to Understand and Overcome Attention-Seeking Behavior ?“ in https://successunlimited-mantra.com/index.php/blog [1st]for more than 3000+ blogs, articles and answers on creating metamorphosis in every aspect of your life - personal, professional, business, mental, emotional, social, relationships - please visit all three links https://relationshipandhappiness.com/ [2nd] and https://www.quora.com/profile/Subhashis-Banerji [3rd]

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