Assuming Responsibility when it's not your fault

When there is a problem there is always a percentage of responsibility for two (or more parties).

If a deal falls through, and it is because the client changed their mind and bought from someone else, whose fault is that?

Many people would blame the client. They bear 100% responsible for the deal not happening.

“It’s not my fault.”

If a candidate accepts a job offer, and then changes their mind and accepts a counter-offer to stay at their current company. Whose fault is that?

Many people would blame the candidate. They bear 100% of the responsibility for the placement not happening.

“It’s not my fault.”

This explanation is a perfectly reasonable explanation for failure of the desired outcome. It’s very common.

It is also very counter-productive.

Instead of turning away from responsibility – particularly in cases like the examples above, where it may seem warranted – it is much more valuable to turn towards it. It is always better to reflect on the problem and assume as much responsibility for the outcome as you can – even if it isn’t your fault. Especially if it isn’t your fault.

If you consider the first example, the client changed their mind and bought from someone else. If you imagine that instead of 100% responsibility, the client now bears 99% responsibility. The other 1% is on you. The 1% responsibility you assume will force you to ask questions like:

Did I fail to see that this might happen?

Did I do all I could to confirm the intentions of the client?

If I could go back to the beginning, what could I have done differently that might have affected the outcome?

The purpose of assuming a small degree of responsibility for things not working out is to take the lesson. To learn what I did that influenced the negative outcome.

Pointing to someone else as the source of all problems will rob you of the chance to reflect and learn.

It is not easy to do this, and it can be difficult to get into the habit.

It hurts our ego to admit that we might have played a part in the problem.

But the rewards are worth it.

Once you assume some responsibility for problems, you can begin to exert more control on the outcome.

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There’s a great post here by Brian Burns about hiring Salespeople and the “Locus of Control”

Check it out: https://www.dhirubhai.net/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6758012766478462976/