Asking for Help is the very FIRST Step!

Eleven years ago today, I was incredibly depressed, miserable and kept saying to myself “I hate my life”. I was building my business in a new city, did not have any friends and just felt this incredible emptiness inside.

I had become the ‘hole in the donut’

I knew I had a problem with alcohol, but a part of me refused to stop. I had become addicted physically, mentally and emotionally.

Addiction is cunning, baffling and powerful.

Since then, I have learned that the “addict” in me doesn’t care about my health, happiness, dreams or relationships. It will always remain consumed and obsessed with one thing-getting its fix, even if it destroys me.

My drug of choice was alcohol. No matter how much I drank, it was never enough. There is a saying in Alcoholics Anonymous: 1 drink is too many and 100 drinks are not enough.

I have also learned that ‘will power’ alone cannot help an addict. Ironically, I had amazing will power when it came to entrepreneurship, growing my company, speaking, travelling around the world and reaching my business goals.

A missing key to getting clean is the ‘spiritual component’.

I never believed in a higher power, God or anything else. I had given up on all that ‘woo woo’ stuff.

Getting out of my ego and accepting that I was completely powerless over alcohol was critical. My life had become totally unmanageable and recognizing that I alone, could not do this, was the first step to getting sober.

I needed help. It’s unbelievable how we have all been taught that asking for help is an act of cowardice. Ironically, when you totally accept being powerless, that is when you get your true power back!

I remember promising God: ‘ if you can help me stop drinking, I will never drink again.’

I joined Alcoholics Anonymous, worked the step program and learned how to ‘live on life’s terms’. I committed to shadow work and learned how to permanently let go of many negative and limiting thoughts, fears, patterns of behaviour, as well as past childhood abuse and trauma.

To this day, I remain a proud member of AA sharing my message of hope, strength and experience. Those just coming into the program, remind us all, of what it was like before recovery and that staying clean or sober is a 'one day at a time' journey.

I transformed into the woman I was destined to be. Most importantly, by tapping into my spirit, I finally found ME.

4 years ago, my only 27 year young son, Adam, died by suicide. If anyone needed an excuse to go back out drinking, this would be a great reason. Instead, I chose to delve into and process this unbearable pain, grief and darkness--- always remembering my promise to God.

Today on Christmas Day, I celebrate 11 years of living alcohol free.

If you, your child or someone you love is struggling with addiction, there is hope and help. If you are unsure that you abuse a drug or even have a potential problem, ask your family members, they will tell you the truth.

If you can admit that you need help and are open to changing, please reach out to [email protected]

It takes great courage and perseverance to have these uncomfortable conversations but always remember, “You are so worth it!”

Merry Christmas and God Bless you,

Maggie