Ask the Questions. Who Are You Following? Why?
I will never work for an abusive leader again. I will never put up with any sort of abuse from a manager, co-worker, executive or administrator ever again. Ever.
That's a boundary. It's one thing to adapt to a culture, it's another entirely to be expected to blindly follow simply because you were told to be obedient.
That's how workplace bullying has become an epidemic. Knowing that is the first step toward a solution. Counter the culture with questions.
If you take it all with a grain of salt, then do your research, you can learn a lot about those leaders who want to be followed. You just have to keep asking the questions in a variety of places, then recognize the source.
Too many of us just blindly follow people too quickly with the assumption that they are right, and rightfully in a place of power. It can throw off your own career journey.
Take Linkedin for example. Who says we have to say, do, be, act, or look like everyone else. No true leader is ever trying to fit in. No independent thinker is ever going to just go along with you just because you said so.
Leadership is a mindset. Not a title. Not a favor. Not a mocking jay. Not money. Not a club, or cult, or guru-wanna-be.
Our work lives are not supposed to be a mine field of riddles, foggy areas, or mental gymnastics we have to navigate, just to earn our wages.
We just treat those things as desirable.
Many months ago, I saw a drove of licensed professionals openly criticize Dr. Gabor Mate. I didn't know why so I asked. None of them would give an open answer, for fear of being seen as ... whatever it is that scared them.
One psychologist on a different platform did courageously offer the three reasons he is not to be as respected as the field would have you believe. Now that I know, I know. And, I agree with the critics. Disappointed in him. As so many others I once thought were amazing leaders, only to be so very different than their online persona.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I learned something about people I once admired for their leadership, only to find out how flawed they were as a human being.
Human beings are flawed. All of them. To expect anything more is to put them on a pedestal.
You don't have to just blindly follow because you were told to. This isn't the military. Even then, building a trusting community means, there will be active engagement.
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We hear entirely too many people in the C-Suite blaming everyone for the shortcomings of their company except what the masses are saying. They refuse to acknowledge the Achilles heal, let alone fix it.
Trail blazers aren't afraid to ask questions. They stay curious and open to new ideas.
You are the new idea if you dare to be you just the way you are.
Keep asking the questions. Don't be afraid to speak up.
When we choose to follow leaders, take a look around at who follows them, along with the why.
What companies are getting wrong is that leaders are to be revered for title sake. Instead, what they would benefit from is, hiring people who can be trusted to offer a healthy workplace environment. People who can lead by growing. People who offer psychological safe spaces for everyone to be included.
When you start asking questions, know that the good leaders will gladly answer them to the best of their ability. The confident ones will admit if they don't know something. The great leaders dare to have flaws, but not abuse those flaws as an excuse to behave badly.
Here's to all the leadership moments that help everyone understand the differences in experiences.
BTW, you don't need a title, an obvious 6-figure salary, an Ivy League education or a bunch of wealthy friends to be a great leader.
It's more about character and how you treat people who can do nothing for you in return. You don't expect the return.
Peace!
KH