Ask Pam | Is it ok for leaders to be friends with direct reports?

Ask Pam | Is it ok for leaders to be friends with direct reports?

This bi-weekly LinkedIn Newsletter will address common and not-so-common questions leaders and executives, like you, have about the culture of the c-suite.

I've been serving in executive roles, reporting to Boards, CEOs, and Executive Directors since my early 20's. I've seen and experienced quite a bit, but mostly, I've learned a lot. These experiences are what led me to executive coaching.

If you're serving in the C-Suite or are headed in that direction, I'd like to hear from you. It's not often you can find a trusted advisor to answer your most pressing questions - for free. So here I am, let's talk!

This Week's Question:

Dear Pam:

Do you believe it is ok for leaders to be friends with direct reports?

To Befriend or Not

This Week's Response:

Dear To Befriend or Not:

Yes, if you can fire them. If not, find friends elsewhere.

Yes, if you can exercise discretion. If not, find friends elsewhere.

Yes, if you can control the narrative as to whether you're exercising discretion. If not...

You can be friendly. But friendship is a deeper relationship tied to expectations you may not be able to live up to. Think about your reputation and your credibility—approach with caution.

I'm curious what do others have to say?

Have a question you'd like for me to answer? Send it to?[email protected] . Remember, your full name and contact details will never be published or distributed.

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Emily K. Branch MBA, PHR, SHRM-CP

Senior human resources executive courageously leading, inspiring, and innovating.

1 年

Am I understanding you correctly Ms. Green, that you believe it is ok to be friends with a direct report if you can fire them?

Kelly E. Griffin

Senior Strategy Consultant & Author | Strategic planning, strategy execution, performance measurement, nonprofit board training | I help nonprofits and other mission-driven organizations be most effective

1 年

I agree with Deborah: yes if you can set clear boundaries, like (obviously) not sharing any work details that are confidential or inappropriate for someone's position and not using inside jokes during work conversations and meetings. I have had true friendships with both managers and subordinates - many that continue to this day!

Deborah Trusie Ebenezer

Programme leader - BA Business and HRM/Lecturer in Human Resource Management and Business at Wrexham University

1 年

I think it is possible for a leader to be friends with a team member (based on my personal experience) provided they have very clear boundaries. A couple of my best friends (we are still friends) were my managers from organisations I used to work for previously. We had very clear boundaries (trust, fairness, honesty, and openness) were professional at work, and wore our friendship hats outside of work (never in the workplace) hence had no issues.

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