The Art of Setting Personal Goals

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This week, I was in a conversation with colleagues about helping clients set meaningful goals for their coaching sessions—goals that not only guide progress but also enable them to feel truly successful. We covered various tools and frameworks like SMART goals, WOOP, and KPIs, and as we talked, an intriguing theme emerged: the unique challenges people face when setting goals.

Goal setting is a skill, but it can feel elusive. For big-picture thinkers, it might seem overwhelming. For detail-oriented planners, it can feel repetitive. Still, having goals is essential. They structure our conversations, help us dig into challenges, and keep us from hovering at surface level. The real struggle lies in defining what goals should look like, especially at the outset. While efficiency in goal setting might seem practical, I’ve found that taking extra time to explore what’s truly valuable pays off in deeper insights.

Strategies Are Great, Until They Aren’t

Working in hypotheticals is tricky. We might plan for outcomes, consider potential roadblocks, and even anticipate others’ actions, but we often leave ourselves out of the equation. Coaching requires us to not only think through scenarios but also reflect on how we show up in them.

Too often, we don’t account for the emotions that might arise, the questions we’ll be asked, or the knowledge we already bring to the table. We’re either overly hard on ourselves, assuming we’ll mess up, or overly confident, brushing past the finer points. The real opportunity lies in developing habits and new ways of thinking that prepare us for these moments.

Some situations feel effortless; others feel like climbing a mountain. Understanding what we bring to each scenario can be transformative. Often, it’s not about changing who we are but about recognizing our adaptability and learning to approach challenges with curiosity and openness. It’s less about fixing others and more about knowing ourselves.

Exploring Where You’ve Been to Find Where to Begin

I worked with a client who was struggling to focus. Our conversations centered on his role and motivating his team, but there was a gap between his perspective and theirs. By exploring his inner “saboteurs,” we discovered his tendency to oscillate between two extremes: perfectionism (everything had to go flawlessly) and avoidance (if it couldn’t be perfect, he would give up). This black-and-white thinking left no room for flexibility.

Once he recognized this pattern, we explored the concept of elasticity in his problem-solving and goal-setting. What if he built in room for imperfection? Could he shift his expectations to allow for adjustments without abandoning his objectives? This mindset shift was a revelation. Suddenly, failure didn’t mean defeat—it became an opportunity to learn, tweak, and keep moving forward.

Had we jumped straight into creating SMART goals, we might have missed this insight. Instead, we focused on helping him develop “elastic habits,” building resilience into his goals and giving himself (and his team) the grace to adapt. This not only improved his delegation skills but also helped him approach goals with a healthier mindset, leading to sustained progress.

Not All Goals Are Created Equal—And You Have to Buy Into Them

Every person’s goals are different. Some are ambitious and require breaking them down into tangible steps. Others are more focused and immediate. Regardless of their scope, goals must be personal. If you’re not bought into your goals, you won’t see them through. Leaders need to understand this for themselves and their teams.

One of the challenges with frameworks like SMART goals is their external focus. In performance reviews, for example, goals are often imposed by managers or the organization. Team members can end up asking, “What do they want me to do to be successful?” instead of, “What do I want to accomplish, and why?”

This misalignment can lead to reviews that feel hollow and uninspiring. Instead, goals should reflect both individual aspirations and organizational priorities. Leaders can support this by offering continual feedback—through quarterly reviews or check-ins—and partnering with their team members to refine and adjust goals as needed. The big vision can remain intact while being broken into manageable steps.

Slowing Down for Lasting Growth

Goal setting isn’t just about strategy and execution. It’s also about personal growth. You may not know exactly what the outcome will look like, but creating realistic, timely goals that align with a larger vision is key to sustained success. As a coach, I’ve found the greatest success happens when clients set goals not only for what they want to achieve but also for how they want to grow in the process.

Slowing down to allow time for reflection and insight is where the magic happens. It’s not about rushing to check a box—it’s about creating goals that inspire, challenge, and prepare us for what’s ahead. Whether you’re working on personal habits, team objectives, or large-scale initiatives, the path to meaningful progress always starts with understanding yourself.

Jessica Rice is dedicated to helping leaders find and leverage their authentic selves in the workplace, fostering environments where they can thrive and achieve their highest potential.

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About the Author

Jessica Rice is an ICF-certified executive coach dedicated to helping ambitious leaders authentically rise to thought leadership. With a passion for empowering individuals and fostering innovation, Jessica provides insights and strategies for leaders to thrive in their unique journeys.

With over 15 years of experience in design and engineering, Jessica has become an expert in leadership transformation and growth strategies. She has worked with professionals from leading companies such as PayPal, Airbnb, Roku, Uber, Clearway, Kyndryl, Lockheed Martin, Boeing, Booz Allen, and major government agencies.

For more content, follow her on LinkedIn and listen to her podcast, The Hello You Show, on YouTube, Spotify, Apple, Amazon, Google and more.