The Art Of Forming A Long Lasting Friendship

FRIENDS FOREVER

Developing and keeping positive friends for the long term.

INTRODUCTION

Having a solitary life has its benefits; you are likely to have more time on your hand, have more time for personal activities, being the way you like to be. However, having friends is an equally delightful experience. The good news is there are possibly billions of people out there, wanting to have friends as well. This article is all about crucial information to meet individuals, which lead to a long-term positive friendship.

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ARE YOU REALLY IN NEED OF FRIENDS?

Having friends may seem all fun to read and hear, which it is, but it also requires certain contribution from you. You should ask yourself whether you could afford to have friends; there are various factors that constrict you from making new long-term friends.

ARE YOU ABLE TO AFFORD TIME FOR YOUR FRIEND?

It is the basic requirement to have friends, if your schedule is too tight packed; there will be no way for you to meet new people. Making time for friends is the first requirement to have friends, as you need time to meet new people and develop it into a friendship. Freeing up your schedule is a necessity to make new friends.

IS YOUR PERSONLITY READY FOR FRIENDS?

In many cases, your mind may be ready for friendship, but your personality may not reflect that. You may have few behavioral patterns that may have let you to lose a friendship in the past. You may have been overly possessive or complacent. These issues should be resolved first, as you do not want to make the same mistakes with the new friends you make.

ARE YOU MENTALLY PREPARED FOR FRIENDSHIP?

To have a friend we must be ready to feel care, attention and concern and to return the same. Having friends one should be able to share secrets. It is important to ask yourself whether you are mentally prepared for such a level of emotion transfer.

ARE YOU DEDICATED ENOUGH?

There is a certain level of dedication required for every relationship. Friendship may not require dedication as much as a romantic relationship. However, you have a commitment of being a good friend to expect the same.

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TO FIND FRIENDS TO YOUR LIKINGS AND PREFERENCES

It is advisable to find individuals with the same likes and preferences to be potential friends. Like-mindedness helps to ensure a long-term friendship.

WHERE TO LOOK FOR

The world has filled with people. Thus, everyone we meet is a possible acquaintance with enough time given anyone can turn into a trustworthy friend, although we are often preoccupied with our task to reach out the people that we meet. Therefore, here are a few places that make it easy for you to gather new friendship.

ENROLL INTO A CLASS OR A SOCIETY

Joining a society or a class in which you have interest enables you to meet like-minded people as they are into the same interests as you are. E.g., join a guitar class or enrolling into a gym membership. Meeting people in classes or clubs gives you a common topic to discuss as both of you are interested in the same thing, you can discuss about new notes and tunes in a music class, your gym mates and you can exchange lifting tips in the gym.

ENGAGE YOURSELF IN THE COMMUNITY ACTIVITY

Being an active member of the community is often viewed as an honorable thing to do. People will start noticing you for your noble intent and would like to connect and communicate with you. Active members of the community receive more number of invites to the social gathering and weddings.

ATTEND SOCIAL GET-TOGETHERS

Try not to avoid any social gathering and attend as many as invites possible. Social get-togethers are often a good way to meet and be introduced to a large number of individuals in a peaceful set-up. Thus, increases your chances of befriending new friends.

FIND FRIENDS THROUGH INTERNET

This is a new trend in making friends; the internet has reduced the location and possibly a time hindrance in making friends. This is highly frequent in the current generation. Various websites are available for people to meet and bond as friends. Some of them are Facebook, MySpace, Imvu and Omegle. The given are a few of the numerous people meet based websites. Some of the limitations are that you cannot meet each other in-person and it is often a great deal of effort to do so. Hangouts, catching a movie, going on a trip are often an arduous or impossible task. Since, the individuals have not met in person there is a greater chance for them to misrepresent them, often intentionally.

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TO EMBARK ON FRIENDSHIP WITH NEW PEOPLE - FIRST STEP TO A POTENTIAL FRIENDSHIP

Now we have covered the ways of meeting a new and possible friend, what is the next step? It is important to start a communication with them.

IMPORTANT STEP IN MAKING FRIENDS

The first impression is very important in making friends. If got on the wrong foot, it is often a lost cause. The first communication we make to the individual often accounts for the first impression. Therefore, the first statement we make to an individual and their reply often interprets the mood and the interests in the individual. A casual way to start the communication is advisable. The most recommended starter line would be stating the obvious, like a comment about the weather or the temperature. Based on their reply, you can gauge their interest in you. A curt, short almost rude reply implies that you are annoying the individual. A friendly yet disinterested comment indicates their mind preoccupied on some other matter. Setting up a different time to re-start the conversation is more suitable in such situations. An elaborate reply with a few questions from them implies you have broken the ice. Often an interesting long conversation takes place, during which the possibility of being friends and the second meet presents itself.

The initial jitter in talking to an individual often wears off, after the first reply. Being you is the key. The individual should like you for who you are, as it is the entire point of having friends. Don not hesitate to make the first contact, the outcome can be only of two ways. It is either positive or negative. If positive, you are going to have a friendly conversation. If negative, you can excuse yourself and move to the other potential acquaintances. Therefore, making a conversation is not a big thing; do not hesitate to break the ice. It is always better to try and may fail than fail to try.

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NURTURING YOUR FRIENDSHIP TO GROW FURTHER

Any relationship requires nurturing, for it to be alive and grow further. It is almost like gardening a plant and friendship is no different from the lot. It also requires close care, time and attention. You may even say nurturing a rare plant is easier than nurturing a trustworthy friendship.

NURTURING YOUR FRIENDLY RELATIONSHIP

Similar to a young plant a newly budded acquaintance requires a deal of nurturing before it blossoms into a friendship. Breaking the ice may be the first step, but the consecutive few days determines your long-term friendly relationship with the person. During the initial conversation, making an opening to meet the individual again is crucial. If, met in a club or classes this might not be necessary as you are definite you can meet the individual again. However if the meet happened on uncertain places like during a travel, it is advised to make an opening for a follow up meeting.

When requesting for information, such as name and number, do not come off strong. Let the conversation flow and allow the space for the individual to open up and give information about them at their ease. Is it advisable to give details about yourself first, like offering your name? Automatically you will often receive a response from them. Be very nonchalant in the information exchange.

To schedule a follow up meet, it is likely preferred to let the individual decide or suggest. A weekend if often advised, as they might have plans on the weekdays. Understand their vibe in the first meet, get the feel of their mood in whether to meet you again and see to it you are comfortable with the individual spending a few hours together. If you could schedule a second meet you, you have succeeded in garnering their friendship. Often, asking additional friends of theirs to come along conveys the message that you truly like them for who they are.

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TAKING YOUR FRIENDLY RELATIONSHIP TO THE NEXT LEVEL

Now that you know the individual that you want to have a friendly relationship with and have gotten the feel that the individual likes you back. It is time to take your friendly relationship to the next level, as the ice is broken. The first conversation is just an opening; it takes a lot more to have a long-term friend whom you can depend on.

THE NEXT LEVEL IN BUILDING FRIENDSHIP

The next big step in making your friendship concrete is to do activities together. This enforces any relationship together and friendship is no different. This is the reason why family bonds are tighter. They have done many activities together. It may even be a simple Christmas dinner, it is special and they got common things to discuss.

To enhance your friendly relationship, it is necessary to do activities together. It brings yourself and your friend a step closer. Keep in mind while asking out for activities; it is a two-way road. You must be ready to reciprocate to their invites. A fresh-shared experience always helps in enhancing one's friendship.

It is advisable to start the activities small, like a dinner together, or a charity event, going to a movie. It is necessary to check the comfort zone of yourself and the individual together. The next important thing to identify is the common ground; an activity done should be pleasurable to both the parties. Some may be interesting to you, and some may for your friends. It is crucial to find the common factor that interests both of you. You do not want your friend or yourself to feel it is a bad idea. So finding common ground is important.

It is advisable to plan and invite to fresh events, often frequently. Going to a newly opened restaurant or accompanying you in the purchase of new stuffs might be some good suggestions.

Another important pointer in enhancing your friendship is sharing and updating events and happening in your life. Often these conveyed events give a reciprocated conversation. It makes your friend feel important and sought after.

Reciprocation is the key. If you initiate an activity, you should receive reciprocation or if asked initially, you should reciprocate.

If either of you do not respond or give back, there is something amiss. In such cases, it is often advisable that you and your friend must spend more time getting to know each other. It is often likely that you may come off strong. The reciprocation is floundering. The key is to go slow.

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CONCLUSION

Having company is necessary in our biological cycle. Since, we the humans who are nothing but evolved apes have always lived in a society. No human can live an enjoyable life alone. Having friends can be one of the best experiences in our mortal life. To care, to share and to be affectionate to those who were once a stranger is a quest on its own. The transformation from a complete stranger to a trusted companion is an enchanting tale of life itself.

We lack the capacity to live a life truly on our own. We are in constant need of individuals to ease the flow of everyday activities. Why not go a step above and surround ourselves with people we know, trust and care. For me, if I am to have people surround me always, I rather have my friends at my side or make the complete stranger a friend. As every individual is a possible friend.

In this article, you have the necessary advice, various tips and important suggestion, on how to make new long-term friends and how to develop a stable and comforting friendship.

“When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives mean the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. The friend who can be silent with us in a moment of despair or confusion, who can stay with us in an hour of grief and bereavement, who can tolerate not knowing, not curing, not healing and face with us the reality of our powerlessness, that is a friend who cares.” 
― Henri J.M. Nouwen, Out of Solitude: Three Meditations on the Christian Life

I certainly do not want to miss such a person neither should you. A friend is always a small effort away. All you have to do is make that effort to reach that special person.