The Art of Deciding

It’s the start of February, and while the world made its resolutions weeks ago, I didn’t. No grand declarations. No forced commitments. Instead, I’ve been sitting with something quieter—the art of deciding.

Not once. Not just at the start of the year. But as a practice. A way of meeting my life, moment by moment, and asking: If I were choosing this again, would I?

What lands for me about this approach is it isn’t about fixing or striving. It’s about choosing—fully, consciously, and with the twinkling curiosity of expansion.

The life I am IN isn’t built on autopilot. It’s built by deciding. Again and again.

What if I decided everything again?

Not just the obvious things—work, relationships, where I live. But the quiet, sneaky things. The stories I tell myself. The rhythms of my days. The roles I play without even realizing it.

I used to think big change happened in bursts—new work, moving countries, life pivots. But lately, I see it differently. Change isn’t a moment. It’s a practice. It’s the willingness to sit with your life, look it in the eye, and ask: Would I still choose this?

That question is thrilling. And terrifying. Because when you ask it honestly, some things don’t survive.

This is where it gets real.

Deciding Again: The Courage to Let Go

I used to hold onto things because I thought I had to—commitments, ways of being, even identities that no longer fit. Yet, when I understand that my past doesn’t own me. I get to decide again.

And so do you.

That’s what I want to offer here—not some abstract concept, but a real, living, breathing practice. One that I am in, right now on February 1, 2025.

I’ve been reading The Last Word on Power by Tracy Goss, and one of the core ideas in the book is this: We are only as free as we allow ourselves to be.

Let that land for a second.

The limits we experience? So many of them aren’t real. They’re inherited. Learned. Reinforced by repetition. And the second we realize that—we become dangerous. Because we can choose something different.

But my mind fights it. It whispers, Aren’t you grateful for what you have? Why want more Hope?

Can I Be Grateful and Still Want More?

There’s an old story I was taught—that if we want more, we’re somehow ungrateful. Bah to that. Gratitude and desire are not enemies. I see them as soulmates.

Gratitude roots us in presence. It lets us see and appreciate where we are. But desire—desire is the thing that pulls us forward.

Shouldn’t I just be happy with what I have? But then I realized—I am. I love my life. I am beyond grateful. And because I love it, I want to keep growing it. Expanding it. That’s what life does.

And that means asking: Is what I’m building truly mine? Or is it a dream I’ve inherited from someone else?

What’s Yours vs. What’s Theirs

I have spent so much of my life filtering my choices through the lens of what should make sense. What others might approve of. And I’ve gotten really good at knowing what people expect of me.

But this process—this deciding again—it’s breaking something open.

Because when I slow down, when I get still, I can feel the difference between what is mine and what I’ve been carrying for others.

And that difference? It changes everything.

When I feel what is truly mine, I don’t need to hustle for it. I don’t need to prove anything. It’s not a chase. It’s a creation. Which brings me to something I’ve been learning the hard way…

Satisfaction and Ambition Can Coexist

I used to believe ambition came from restlessness. From a hunger for more. But that’s not it.

The most powerful growth doesn’t come from chasing. It comes from knowing.

I’m learning that I don’t have to choose between deep contentment and big dreams. I can be wildly at peace and wildly in motion. Both.

I don’t need to feel like something is missing in order to create something extraordinary. I can love my life as it is and stretch into something bigger.

Living On Purpose vs. Living By Default

So much of life happens on autopilot. Routines. Roles. Patterns. And for a long time, I let momentum carry me.

But I’m not interested in that anymore.

I am committed to living on purpose. I want to know that every choice I’m making—how I spend my time, what I build, what I say yes and no to—is mine. Not a script I inherited.

And I have to tell you—this process? It’s not comfortable. It’s raw. But I would rather sit in the discomfort of waking up than the numbness of sleepwalking through my life.

And one of the biggest shifts I’ve felt? It’s moving from scarcity into anticipation.

Anticipation Over Scarcity

I used to grip things tightly, afraid that if I let go, I wouldn’t get more. But I’ve learned something radical:

Life keeps meeting me where I am.

Every time I’ve released something—an old belief, a way of being—what’s next has always arrived.

Scarcity tells us to cling. But anticipation? Anticipation is trust.

Trust that expansion is always on its way.

Letting Go to Let More In

Who I was last year—five years ago—that Hope got me here. But she is not the one who will take me where I’m going next.

And that’s true for you, too.

We hold on to old versions of ourselves because they feel safe. But real transformation happens when we loosen our grip. When we trust that the next version of us—the one waiting just beyond the edge of the known—is worth stepping toward.

So I’m asking you what I’ve been asking myself, over and over this year:

If you were deciding again, right now—what would you choose? And are you brave enough to choose it?

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