Arrogance Diminishes One’s Awareness of Others

A Flawed Foundation: Overestimation of one’s intelligence and resistance to new information creates less flexibility in one’s ability to consider the perspectives of others. Whether it’s to protect our identity or self-perception, this form of arrogance diminishes one’s awareness of others, limits thinking and fulfills only our own self-fulfilling prophecies.

When our motivation is to maintain high self-esteem by overvaluing our own knowledge, or confidence in our own abilities, we demonstrate a presence of superiority to those around us, called arrogance. Learning requires the humility to realize that we have something to learn, and for those who cannot admit every individual (including oneself) has a flawed palette of knowledge, they will be left behind intellectually.

I have a strong tendency to insert my opinion during conversations. It’s exciting having the ability to converse intellectually with others. Especially those within the same field. I love being an independent agent. I love talking about policies, product lines and class codes. I love to talk, talk, talk, a lot. However, if I just shut up every now and then, and listen. I’d be more apt to take in new, much needed information, rather than force my opinion down everyone’s throats.

So, what’s my motivation to talk so much? An unconscious whim to inform people in the room, I know my stuff. I’ve got a bag full of tools here I want others to know about, so they feel I am worthy to be in the conversation. However, this is a flawed foundation. If they didn’t feel I was worthy of being there, I wouldn’t be in the room, or in the conversation, in the first place. Expanding my knowledge base requires me to be open and accept new information, weighing it against my own, and to do so, requires admitting I have something to learn in the first place.

Arrogance is an unrealistic assessment of our own knowledge and abilities, employed as a defense mechanism. We may not realize it, but we use this defense mechanism to keep others from discovering the fact we don’t know everything. So that those around us won’t discover we’re some imposter in the room, who doesn’t belong due to our degree of knowledge. Thus, protecting our own identity, but avoiding new concepts all together. Here’s the thing, “So, what, you don’t know everything!” “Who the hell does?” If all we do is force our opinion down everyone’s throats and walk away learning nothing, we will be left behind intellectually and have a flawed opinion of how everyone else viewed our conversation. We think we’re “important”, they all think we’re “arrogant.”

Showing intellectual humility demonstrates to others we’re comfortable in our own knowledge base, wish to expand it, and value their opinion. Which is a much friendlier and constructive environment than being stuck in a board room with an arrogant “know it all.” Let’s face it, not everything is about you. When was the last time you valued someone’s opinion more than your own? Reached out for their position on a subject you view highly? Were open to an idea different than your own?

Ways to reduce arrogance: Be grateful for your conversation partners. Even small conversations can be difficult. Respect that they are there in the first place, by asking for their opinion and being open to it. Demonstrating active listening skills and reducing the number of times you try to correct their values to your own. ?You may have a specific system, but they may be able to contribute in some way. Allow them that chance. Show others that you are more interested in them than in yourself. -Michelle

“Be more interested than interesting”- Rachel Greenwald