April's Fools Day

Each day, the cloakroom compiles the attendance for the Leader that provides needed input for the scheduling of important votes. On his attendance card, which lists all the Democratic Senators’ names, absentees are circled in red, so with a majority of 53 you never wanted more than one or two circled. One day following his opening remarks, while he was still at his desk standing at his podium, I gave Senator Mitchell his attendance card for that day. I had circled in red about 13 absent. He looked at it and said something along the lines of, “What the hell is this!?”

?“It looks like it could be a tough day,” I said.

He went off like a Roman candle, spewing forth a tirade of expletives, “What the #!*$ do these guys think they’re doing!??” As he got more and more worked up with his face turning crimson, before he had a stroke, I leaned in and quietly said: “April Fools.” The Secretary for the Majority, Abby Saffold and Mitchell’s Chief of Staff, Martha Pope, had been standing at the back of the chamber the whole time, knowing of my plan, and they were enjoying Senator Mitchell’s meltdown. He looked at me and smiled and said, “You son of a bitch!” We both laughed. He turned and saw Abby and Martha laughing and he just shrugged his shoulders and headed to his office.

?Later that day, he got a kick out of hearing that the tables had been turned on me by the cloakroom staff. They had given me a note, one of dozens I got each day, with a name and a phone number on it. It said Myra Manes had called and it had a DC phone number, so I called it, standing at a desk in the cloakroom while the staff watched me ask for Myra Manes. the man who had answered the phone asked me to repeat myself which I did, whereupon he replied, “Sir, someone’s playing a trick on you, this is a funeral home and your remains are not here.” I turned beet red as I thanked him and hung up the phone as the cloakroom staff were falling out of their chairs laughing. When this story was later relayed to Senator Mitchell, I heard that he thoroughly enjoyed it.

Bradley Austin

Senior Communications and Development manager

2 周

thanks for the fun memory.

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Michael Myers

Retired (sorta) policy strategist.

3 个月

Love it, Marty. What memories.

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Brian McKeon

Deputy Secretary | International Affairs Expert | J.D.

3 个月

That took some courage to do this to Mitchell. His prior Senate boss (Muskie) was known to have quite the temper.

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Kelly Horwitz

Partner and Certified Appellate Law Specialist at Benedon & Serlin

3 个月

I remember Mitchell going apoplectic over legit attendance issues. It was right after August recess when Senators had had plenty of flexibility in their schedules. It was approaching dinner time and everyone was asking for guarantees that no votes would occur as they ran off to various fundraisers. Mitchell ranted about all the requests “I need to dinner, I need to tend my sick dog, I need to shine my shoes,” he mocked. No sooner had he stopped than Strom Thurmond ambled up, oblivious. “Mistah Leadah, are we having any votes? I need to go see (the movie) ‘Gettysbuhg’!” I don’t think it happened, but I imagine Mitchell throwing something in exasperation at that point.

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