Appreciating Others Builds Your Business.

1. First and foremost, don’t try to fake it.

 Trying to act like you appreciate someone when you actually don’t typically doesn’t go well, and perceived inauthenticity will undermine any trust that may exist in the relationship.

2. Secondly, don’t try to push through it and “make yourself” appreciate a colleague. (And you don’t have to feel guilty about it, either!) What we have learned over time is that to appreciate someone is both a heart issue and behavior. Like any feeling we may experience, you can’t force yourself to appreciate someone. However, similar to our other feeling responses, there are ways to make it more likely that we will eventually have a heartfelt appreciation for someone.The source of appreciation is when we value something about another person: who they are, what they are able to do, what they know, their character qualities. When you don’t or can’t appreciate someone, the solution involves looking and exploring what about them you might value.

You might value the fact that they know how to search for information well on the Internet. Or you may admire the experience and knowledge they have about your industry and competitors. Anything that makes them a better employee is a possibility – some specific skill or unique experience they have.

Look for something positive in their life, whether it is related to work or not, and bring attention to that characteristic or behavior.

The point is: when you are having a hard time finding something to appreciate about another team member, there are two valuable steps that will be helpful:

3. Find out more about what they do.

 Often we think we know what a colleague does, but really don’t. They have lives outside of the office, let them share about that. Know the names of their family members and ask about them.

Take some time to get to know them better personally (their past and where they came from, where they have lived, their current life circumstances, hobbies and interests). Frequently, when we find out more about an individual, we discover some “touch stones” between their lives and ours.

4. Dealing with Difficult Colleagues

You may experience an unexpected benefit by trying to find ways to communicate appreciation to difficult colleagues – you may actually begin to truly feel appreciation for them! Research (and many people’s personal experience) has demonstrated that feelings about a person or situation can actually change as a result of behaving and thinking differently. (There is a subtle difference between acting “as if” you value someone with the purpose of developing appreciation in the process, and just trying to fake it, with no real interest in them as a person.)

Finally, don’t forget that you – your actions, reactions, and attitudes – have a major influence on the level of vitality and health of your environment!

Servant leaders lead by example, actions speak louder than words.

Charlyn Shelton, America's #1 Relationship Builder

C. 321.446.5334

Sharing from Appreciation Blog.