Appreciating Magic in the Everyday: Viewing Life & Loss Through a Broader Lens

12 years ago this week, friends from all around the world gathered in Toronto to celebrate the life of our friend, Jonathan Appel (1974-2010).

The circumstances that brought together my friendship with Jon: the timing, the synchronicity, and the serendipity throughout it all - even during the extremely painful period following his passing, have allowed me to look at life through a wider lens, with a greater sense of reverence and awe. While I've always appreciated the magic buried within moments, both the grand and the seemingly ordinary alike, simply knowing Jon has allowed me to appreciate these phenomena on a deeper level.

Losing Jon was the first major loss I'd experienced in my life. Up to that point, I'd been spared the pain of what it's like to experience a sudden and unexpected passing of someone close to me, friend or family. Jon was both, a dear friend that I considered family. Life lost so much of its sparkle in the days, weeks and months following this tragedy, in large part because I was trying to make sense out of how someone so kind could be dealt such a unforgiving hand. This cast a shadow over my perspective and forced me to dig deeper, to question and reexamine my beliefs.

Ultimately, I received many profound lessons as a result, learning to embrace the pockets of light that dance amidst the shadows of sorrow, brokenness and pain.

Jon was full of wisdom, humor and inspiration to all who were lucky enough to know him. I thought I'd share this tribute I wrote in the days following his passing. I'd originally posted it on social media. Days later I was overcome with emotion, surprised to hear these same words read aloud by Jon's father at his funeral. A friend had emailed it to the family, and it was used as his eulogy.

I share this experience, not to be sad, but to encourage you to remember to celebrate the moments, and the people that bring magic to your life. And also as a reminder that some of the most extraordinary experiences and people that will grace your journey, will appear unannounced and unplanned.

We're surrounded by miracles, if we only remember to look for them....?

?Remembering Jon ?

"Knowing Jon has been one of my life’s greatest blessings.

We met when I was working at a comedy event. After everyone was seated in the Main Theater, I was able to sit in the overflow screening room to watch a new documentary called Souled Out Comedy. I was all by myself, until a friendly fellow stuck his head in and asked me what I thought of the movie. I shared how much I loved seeing these comedians pursuing their dreams and how inspiring it was to me. I had no idea who he was, and just figured he was a festival patron. After a lengthy conversation about our mutual love of comedy, I interrupted, apologizing for speaking over the film. It was at this point that he matter-of-factly mentioned that Souled Out Comedy was his project and we resumed our conversation. Later, I’d tip-toed into the main theater to watch the awards ceremony and there he was again – this time accepting an award for his film! It was such a happy day.

So many memories…I will never forget the day he invited me for coffee. It was only our second meeting, but it was like I was sitting down with an old friend I’d known forever. He was so incredibly kind. We ended up having dinner at a Columbus Circle café and we discussed such a wide range of topics from philosophy, hopes, dreams, life and the arts - to food allergies - I really don't think we left one stone unturned. We spoke for hours, but it seemed like minutes. It felt like a dream - I have never spoken with anyone that viewed and lived life with more excitement and curiosity...he was both childlike in his unrelenting interest in all things, and wise, like someone that had lived for one hundred years.

His perspective of the world was one of such beauty and detail. We discussed synesthesia, [a perceptual phenomenon in which stimulation of one sensory or cognitive pathway leads to involuntary experiences in a second sensory or cognitive pathway. A synesthetes himself, he'd experienced this his entire life. We discussed what it was like, in depth,] as I had never heard of it before, and it was one of the most fascinating things I'd ever heard of! I can't tell you how much fun we had; odd as it may sound, examining the marble pillar next to our table. We must have spent a good half hour at least staring at that thing! It was incredible though. He described all the images that he could see in the marble, and I was having fun trying to do the same. This was the perfect metaphor for Jon. He'd take something right under your nose, something seemingly plain and ordinary, and reveal layer upon layer of things that one might never see or think about. We spoke about how there are no coincidences in life, but he, in typical Jon fashion, described this phenomena in the most wonderful way I have ever heard.

In that one conversation, he completely shook up the way in which I viewed the world, but not so much in a way that shocked me...it was like he was describing things that I already knew to be true, on a subconscious or spiritual level, but he brought them right to the surface. [For the first time in a long time, I felt a weight lifted on so many levels. My worries and fears seemed to fade], and I felt confident that I could face any challenge, no matter how big - his words inspired me that much. It was the single-most powerful conversation I have ever had in my life.

Jon was truly an angel on this Earth, and I know how incredibly blessed I was to know him. I believe that he is watching down on all of us now, continuing to create miracles from above, as he did in the precious time that he spent with all of us during his life. I'm certain that he contributed more positivity, compassion, and wisdom in a day than most people ever generate in an entire lifetime. There is no doubt that his spirit still lives on in all of the lives that he touched, and his kindness will have a ripple effect of positivity, beyond measure, for years to come."

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Andrea Simmons is a senior producer, strategist, writer and creative consultant living in New York City.

Specializing in strategic direction and innovation, her creative solutions to marketing, engagement, customer success, partnerships, public relations, and sales have guided clients and brands to reach their full potential in the entertainment, health/wellness, fashion, beauty, fintech, philanthropic and humanitarian communities. She is passionate about bringing a brand's authentic voice & mission to life, as well as championing clients' needs and bringing a voice to those without a platform.