Whitney Sharpe Deserved Better

When Whitney Sharpe called in an organization for their non-inclusive behaviours, the VP of sales responded with an extremely lacklustre and disingenuous apology. Whitney deserved better, and if this VP of sales had a more anti-oppressive lens, their apology would have been more affirming and communicated that this is a mistake the organization will not make again.

Here is what Bloom would have done differently:

Looking at this VP’s approach, they could have taken more ownership of their actions AND displayed their commitment to reconciliation in a more authentic, transparent and accountable manner. At Bloom, we say there is no "u" in apology, meaning an intentional and genuine apology should centre the needs of the individual affected by your non-inclusive behaviour. Prioritizing inclusive practices means employing them when you make a mistake, which doesn't only apply to individuals but to organizations as well. An inclusive apology is one that is not only authentic but includes a commitment to accountability. Being accountable provides a framework for people to measure your " work " to make amends. Think of accountability as being your rubric for reconciliation.?

With that in mind, what could this vendor have done to create an authentic apology??

1. At a high level, this vendor's apology fails to acknowledge the systems that contributed to the behaviour displayed by his employees. This is further exemplified in the statement that the organization "doesn't have anyone skilled enough to assist you that is a female".?
2. Let's improve this statement: Had the VP of Sales have had proper training and education on DEI, he could have said: "At the moment, we do not have any women available to support you in this role, but your request for this support has highlighted some gaps in our commitment to diversity here at X. We acknowledge this gap in representation on our team and regret not having a more inclusive and anti-oppressive recruitment process to hire folks of all genders. If you are comfortable, we are committed to seeing if there is someone in a more jr. level position that a senior-level sales member could support to help you while we work to create a more inclusive and equitable culture here at X.?
3. The VP of Sales states, "this type of behaviour is not endorsed and is not the type of organization we're running here". What behaviour? By not directly acknowledging the behaviour and its direct impact on those it harms, there is no accountability nor framework to ensure the behaviour is identified and unlearned. The vendor's apology doesn't name or frame the non-inclusive behaviour, its impact on the victim, and how this behaviour erodes an organization's culture of inclusion. The culture of any organization is shaped by the worst behaviour the leader is willing to tolerate. Failure to specify or label non-inclusive behaviours in many ways creates a culture of silence that enables these behaviours.
4. There is no "u" in apology, meaning an apology is not about you (or your organization). An affirming apology speaks directly to the feelings and experiences of the harmed individual. In the apology, the VP of sales uses phrases like "embarrassing" and "a poor reflection of the company", both of which position the apology in relation to their own feelings, how it affects the company rather than how it affects the individual who was harmed. While yes, this situation is embarrassing for the company, when crafting an apology, it's paramount to position the needs of the harmed party at the forefront of the dialogue. Take the time to practice empathy instead of sympathy, and use words that validate the person's feelings in response to the non-inclusive behaviour. Phrases like "This behaviour is deplorable, this shouldn't have happened to you, and we can only imagine how un-affirming this experience was for you. We heard what you said; we're looking to action on your feedback and ensure this doesn't happen again. Can we share our road to reconciliation with you, the one we have mapped out? I want to commit to a date that works for you."
5. Lastly, commitment to reconciliation and accountability. This VP of Sales? did not state how they plan to ensure this behaviour doesn't happen again or identify what systems or ways of work uphold these non-inclusive behaviours. Accountability might look like this:?
6. Committing to a company-wide learning diversity, equity, and inclusion learning experience that will equip leaders, managers, sales representatives, and human resources folks.?
7. Auditing your workplace codes of conduct, anti-harassment and DEI policies and committing to familiarizing your staff with them quarterly.?