Anxiety Disrupts

“When I see an anxious person, I ask myself, what do they want? For if a person wasn’t wanting something outside of their own control, why would they be stricken by anxiety?” ~ Epictetus, Discourses

Equanimity is a state of psychological stability and composure which is undisturbed by experience of or exposure to emotions, pain, or other phenomena that may cause others to lose the balance of their mind. How do you invite this into your experience of life and leadership? And, perhaps more importantly as a leader, why would you want to do so?

We are fields of energy that others interact with – our moods are contagious. When our energetic field is perturbed and in turmoil those around us feel it and make meaning up about it.

Consequently, as leaders, we want to be able to manage our mood states. The most effective way I have ever found to do this is simply to recognize what is and what isn’t in my control. What is in my control are my thoughts, my feelings, my emotions and my behaviors. Everything else is out of my control. Anxiety is the consequence of wanting something outside of our control to be different. We get worked up, excited, nervous and focused on the short term.

This type of thinking and approach to leadership and living is a muscle that needs to be exercised in order to become fully useful. Equanimity is the evidence that I am succeeding in developing this muscle. The world around us – society, the news, pop culture, social media, world and local events – all conspire to tell us we should be “in charge” of everything if we are to be effective as leaders. When I “invite” equanimity into my life I have acknowledged and owned my true source of power which is simply that over which I actually have control. The Stoic Philosophers called this our prohairesis. It’s a reasoned choice to not be at effect of what goes on around me. It’s the kind of cultivated choice that allows us to withstand with equanimity the inevitable pressures, problems and even hostile attacks from others that come from being a visible and audacious leader.

This week my invitation to you is to pay attention and strive to not be at effect of what your five senses tell you is “real”. What’s real is what you have in your control – your thoughts, feelings, attitude, and behavior. Master these and all else ceases to matter.

To master anything, we must first master ourselves—our emotions, our thoughts, our actions. In times of uncertainty and disorder, self-discipline and self-mastery are not just essential but are your competitive advantage.

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