The Anointing (A Short Story)

"An anointing is an activator. Timing is essential for it to happen. It activates what God has in store." (c) Bob Roza

Philip and Anna were in the afterglow of an intense love making session. Both were sweaty and exhausted with the energy their bodies released. Philip hoisted himself on his elbows and LQQKED lovingly into Anna's closed eyes. It was hard for him to imagine what transpired. He felt alive and complete. Intimacy was missing from his life. He settled for physical intimacy when he needed more. With his right index finger he traced Anna's face, stopped at her forehead, and made the sign of the cross over it. "I anoint you to do great things with your life." He said it twice. Not thinking about its affects or why he said it.

"Hey asshole, what the heck was that?" Anna said. She had a crassness that was insulting and inappropriate.

Philip blinked and came out of his reverie. "What?" he replied.

"Asshole, what did you just say? We just had great sex. Why would you say and do what you did?" She cackled like a witch.

"I don't know." he said. His action seemed right and in the moment.

She got up from the wet sheets and walked naked into the bathroom.

"Why do you have to be so crass?" her asked her.

She didn't reply. She didn't know how to address his questions when he wanted an adult answer. She didn't have the skills he had. He had so much more experience in therapy than she did. Those behaviors manifested daily. On one level, she admired his behavioral style. On another level, she hated it because it reminded her of what she gave up when she didn't go to college. She pursued a career as a hair stylist. The course work was a joke. She breezed through the courses but they never really challenged her. She worked at a neighborhood beauty shop her entire career. The same clients ALWAYS with the same hair styles. And with these hair styles came the same conversations of what went down in the neighborhood -- NOTHING.

He asked her again.

She returned to the room, walked up to him and mimicked his tone.

The both stood naked -- their vulnerabilities were palpable.

He hated when she did that. She had this way of insulting anything that reflected a respectful tone to an adult situation.

He recognized Anna's goading as an invitation to another fight and he would not enter into another one. He turned away from her, got dressed and left. He needed to cool off and re-evaluate where things were headed.

Weeks went by. His instincts told him it was best to just let things die with Anna. She didn't have the wants to pursue therapy. It was too much of an emotional investment for her, not for him. Past confrontations with her were always the same. She offered a weak, tepid apology and he accepted it because dealing with her?always?left him exhausted.

This cycle was unhealthy because he never got what he wanted from it -- unless it was awesome sex which had died on the vine years before.

His decision to not call her sent a strong message that things were over and that they would both have to move on.

He worked hard to earn his college degree. By trade, he was a college professor with his Ph.D in psychology. When he studied, he pursued therapy to heal his family issues. He believed that he wouldn't be effective as a therapist if those issues hadn't been addressed. He was a professional student by nature. He loved school but that didn't give him an opportunity to pursue his personal life. Anna was his first relationship. She asked him out the first time she did his hair. He was flattered with her flirting. Despite the fact that he'd been in therapy to understand love, he was?always?unsure of how Anna saw him. Did she see him as an integral and important part of her life or just someone who fulfilled and satisfied her need for consistent sex. Her libido was high and he met her needs BUT he needed more emotional intimacy from her. He found it in the conversations he had with his colleagues. They revealed who they were with the topics they talked about. This wasn't the case with Anna. She spoke on things on the surface. There was never any depth to her communication. Philip saw positive cracks in her style after lovemaking but it never was consistent. This left him unfulfilled. He stayed too long at this fair and was unsure how to end it. It had died years ago, yet he stayed. There was a deep belief that no one would really want him after the loss of his father. They shared so much together. Tragically, his father died when he was five. He loved his father deeply and longed for a love like that to manifest with Anna. Maybe his belief was disjointed.

His mom, Vivian grieved her loss and moved forward with a new love. She met him through a personal ad. Their chemistries clicked and after a number of months, her beau Charles popped the question. She accepted and they'd been together for years. A recent development ensued for his mom. She was nearing retirement and needed to downsize from her current home. She contacted Philip and asked him to help her clean out some last minute remnants.

Days passed and Philip went to help his mom.

"Mom, where are we headed today?"

"Honey, we're going into the attic. There are so many boxes up there. I only have a couple of days to get to them. We're closing on both our old/new home in a week."

They both headed up to the attic.?

He picked up a heavy box. "Jesus, this is heavy. What do you have in here?"

"I don't know. Put the box down and open it."

He did as she suggested. He opened the box to find a number of envelopes. Specifically, they were negatives of photos.

"Mom, what's this?"

"Honey, those are negatives from pictures your father and I took years ago. Back in the day when photos were developed, they included the negatives so that you could order more pictures."

"I see, " he said. He took out the photos and looked at them with a curious intensity. It was as if he was transported back in time. His time in therapy told him that memorabilia was a good reminder of what was important, then and NOW. He carefully looked at ALL these pictures. He remembered many of these events. He picked up a colored photo. It was his father holding him.

The tears filled his eyes. The connection with his father was re-ignited. He missed him so much. He tried to speak but couldn't. The words caught in his throat. He gave the?photo to his mom and composed himself.

"Oh my God. The two of you are so handsome! Your father had such a vibrant smile that day. I'd never seen it before. And those blue eyes . . . You know, those eyes changed to different shades of blue depending on the kind of day he had. On the day you were born, that shade of blue was radiant."

"Mom, we haven't talked about dad in a long time. Why is that?"

She let out a DEEP sigh. "You know honey, at the time, your father was the love of my life. I never thought I'd find a love that was as honest and pure as his. He worshipped the ground I walked on. For both of us, you were a late in life baby, We didn't know if we could pull this off. We tried for so long and then eventually just let it go. I believe that God stepped in when we realized our ability to do this was fruitless. God has that way about Him -- waiting until you give up and then He steps in."

"Please continue mom. I want to hear more."

"O.K., please be patient with me. As I speak, all the positive memories flash in my mind and wash over me. When you want something important, you pray on it but you can never fully process the immensity of what God has in store for you. Since your father's passing, I've tried to process and piece together the great gift that God gave me but each time, I remember more. I recognize God's gift(s) has so many layers to it. You don't realize the immensity of it until you talk about it, over and over again. When I knew that I was going to have a boy, your father?prayed that God would give you blue eyes. Look at your father's eyes. His genetics were passed on to you."

"You mean his eyes, right?"

"Not just his eyes but his essence, his legacy, his spirituality. All of that is inside of you. It will never go away. You see, he never had a family system like the one we built. He had never heard the words, 'I love you,' from anyone in his family. He recognized that the wanted to change his family system and the only way that would happen is when he changed some family behaviors or patterns."

"What do you mean mom?"

"Philip, in order to do something different in a marriage, you have to look at what didn't go so well and consciously change it. Your father didn't feel a lot of love from his parents and family so he needed to create it and teach it to his family so that he could get what he needed -- physically, emotionally and spiritually. He was in counseling for years before he met me. His intention was to learn a new way of dealing with people and every day, he would project what he learned from his therapist and do it with others. Can you understand that?"

"Yes, but that sounds exhausting!"

"It can be exhausting but your father was committed to changing himself so that he would NOT repeat any of the bad things that hurt him. Not being told that you are loved or wanted is something that we ALL need to hear every day. You know being with him was hard for me."

"How so, mom?"

"Well, I didn't have good things happen in my family. Love was not expressed in a positive way. I met your father and he was telling me his feelings right away. I didn't know how to understand that. It was like your father was an alien. I couldn't relate to him. There were many times when I wanted to run away. It was so hard to understand. He wanted and expected me to be like him, ya know, expressive. I told him many times that I couldn't do it. I wasn't taught how to tell people how I felt. I had to learn from him. And ya know what?"

"What?"

"It got easier in time. Your father would say things like, 'When I tell you how I feel, it should be easy because you don't have to guess how I feel. I am telling you right away. Your job is to understand and remember it. Once you do, you know right away. Many people don't know how to do that. That was one of the reasons your father went into therapy. He wanted to learn another way so that it took all the guess work out of the friendships he had with others."

"And how did that go?"

"Honey, it was hard. He put a lot of time into people and while they loved the way he treated them, they couldn't reciprocate so he had to let them go. Then I came along and he was patient and kind with me. He wanted to build a life with me and vice versa. It was worth my time to stay with him. I'm glad I stayed with him. We built a wonderful life together. But getting back to you . . . He recognized that he had some important work to do. He wanted to make sure that when you were born that he'd not waste a second in instilling you with an everlasting legacy."

He took in a deep breath and exhaled as his mom continued.

"The day you were born was so spiritual. I felt contractions and we both got excited and nervous at the same time. We made it to the hospital and you started crowning. We couldn't wait. They wheeled me into the delivery room and I wanted to push. In a matter of minutes you were here. We couldn't believe it. And then the nurse placed you into your father's arms. The both of us were sobbing. We wanted you so badly. We were so glad and joyous that you were here. You cried a bit when the nurse transferred you to your father He rocked you gently and covered you with so many kisses. He just wanted you to relax and just 'be.' And then it happened. He took his right index finger, traced your face and told you that he loved you. Then he traced the sign of the cross over your forehead and said, 'Today, I anoint you to do great things with your life. I promise this anointing from this day forward so that you know that you are loved and purposeful, and that you understand the great legacy that through God, you will change and impact the lives of others just as you've done for me." I observed the interactions between the two of you. His words came effortlessly. He never stopped. I could only think that God and the Holy Spirit were in the room at the time.?And then we brought you home. And true to form, he would greet you every morning in the same way -- picking you up gently, welcoming you to another day, tracing your face with his index finger, making the sign of the cross in the center of your face and saying, "I anoint you to do great things with your life."

"Mom, this can't be. Did he do this everyday?"

"Yes, honey, every day! There were times when he thought he forgot. He'd leave for work and as soon as he got there, he'd call and admit that he forgot the anointing. He'd ask me to put the phone next to your ear and he'd say the anointing so that you'd have it again. When you started preschool, he'd take you to school, take you out of your car seat and walk you to the curb. He'd bend down to your level and anoint you to make sure you were entering school with the anointing. There were many times, usually on the weekends when things were quiet that you'd climb into his lap and ask him, "Daddy, can I have the anointing?" And he would do it. He would stop what ever he was doing and just so it."

Philip replied, "I'm so overwhelmed with this story."

"Honey, we're not done. Your father?never?did anything half-ass. When he was involved in something that was important to him, he went into overdrive to complete it. He wanted to make sure that when you were born that he'd not waste a second in instilling you with an everlasting legacy. As you grew up, we'd talk more about how smart you were. Even when you were young, you had a leadership quality that took our breaths away. You were able to calm other kids down etc. There was something about you. You had an aura or a gift that you exuded every day. And when your father and I spoke about you, he'd always say that your anointing from him and God was the best validation. Because it was started when you were young, it was already in place. You'd never wonder what you'd do later in life because the process was already in place. There are many stories in the Bible that refer to "fruits" or "talents." Those stories are geared specifically to the anointing that each of us has. Your talent is leadership/teaching. That talent was given to you by God. In another way, it was reinforced by your father every day. What you're doing right now is a BIG deal because you are a walking/talking example of the validation(s) from God/Spirit and your father. Every person you interact with is blessed by your personality. They benefit from all the time you spend with them. What is so interesting about ALL of this is that you don't know what you're doing to empower them and they have no idea that it's even happening. It's a mystical/spiritual thing. I can't explain it any other way. The only way that?people might even "get" that it came from you is when they remember something that you might have said or did to them, but that might come years later after you are no longer in their lives."

"I can't believe the synchronicity of any of this." he said.

"Just believe that it's in process honey. Babe, there's one more thing I need to tell you. It's about the final moment you had with your dad. Do you remember anything about the day when we went to the hospital? You were about 5 and just started kindergarten."

"I remember going to the hospital but that's about it."

"Well, your father had a heart attack and we learned that he needed to have open heart surgery since ALL of his arteries were clogged. The doctors told us that it would be a good idea to visit, to try to cheer him up since he was very tired and depressed. I didn't know how to process any of this, since your dad never showed any kind of sickness ever. But I knew I had to go there because he was scared. We got to the hospital and walked into the intensive care unit. He was hooked up to so many machines and was on oxygen to help him breathe. When he saw you in the room, he wanted to be close to you because he knew you were scared. I gently picked you up and told you to be quiet so that you wouldn't agitate him. So, I put you in the bed and told you to be quiet. When I did, your father coughed a bit. It was hard for him to talk but he wanted to say something to you. In a very careful way, he told you again that he loved you and that he was proud of you. I recognized the tone of his talk and knew he was saying goodbye to you. I could tell by his actions that he knew his time was short. And then true to form, it happened . . ."

"Oh mom, nooooooooooooooooooooooo!!"

She was weeping at this final piece to the puzzle. "He took his finger and traced it over your face. The look in his eyes was so telling, so full of love and then he did it. He took his index finger and gave you the anointing. What took my breath away was that he said the EXACT same words he said to you the day you were born . . . "Today, I anoint you to do great things with your life. I promise this anointing from this day forward so that you understand the great legacy that through God, you will change and impact the lives of others just as you've done for me." And then very gently, he kissed you on the lips. He took a deep breath and then let you go. The machines started to beep and I knew that it was over. He was gone."

At this point, Philip was sobbing. He took the picture and pulled it to his chest. He continued to sob. His mother watched and said nothing.

"Mom, I can't handle anymore. You said you'll close in a couple of days right?"

She nodded.

"Give me a couple of days to process what you told me. I will call you and we'll finish this attic stuff. O.K.?"

She nodded again. Tears streamed down her face.

He got his stuff and left. He drove to the beach and just sat in the sand. The beach/ocean was his happy place. It was like going to church. The energy was always calming. His thoughts turned to Anna and how he anointed her. While he couldn't?understand why he did it in the way he did, he had to trust God/Spirit that that anointing had to happen just as his mom described.

Anna got out of the shower. She took the warm fresh towel off the hook and began to dry herself off. Her thoughts turned to Philip. It had been weeks since?their last encounter. In a very odd way being away from him was necessary. The relationship ended gradually until it was DONE. It didn't seem right to pick up the phone and call him. She felt different about the last time they were together. It felt odd but NOT in a bad way.

The bathroom door was closed when she took her shower. The hot mist had settled on to the mirror. She took her hand and cleared it away. She dried her hair and looked at her reflection. There was something different about the way she looked. He face looked stronger . . . more valid and empowered. In her mind, she faintly heard Philip's voice. She took her index finger and traced her face. It settled onto her forehead. Philip's voice became stronger. She heard it vividly . . . clearly. "I anoint you to do great things with your life." She traced the sign of the cross over her forehead . . . twice. She looked at he reflection in the mirror.?

There was a momentum to what just happened. She remembered the promise she made to her mother just before she died. She assured her mom that she'd continue to take care of her father. She had just graduated from high school and had no direction to a future career. Her father wasn't an invalid. The promise seemed perfunctory, yet for some reason she still clung to it. At the time, she remembered what happened days after. Secretly, she applied to the college she always wanted to go to. She was shocked at the letter's size. She didn't know the difference between a thin letter vs. a thick one. The thick one was the "golden ticket" that many potential students wanted. It carried a generous financial aid package that helped supplement the high cost of tuition. The package was thick. She opened it and read its contents. She was overwhelmed with its contents. She was awarded a full 4 year scholarship. She could pursue her dream to be a psychologist or a social worker. The contents fell to the ground. She stared in disillusionment at it. She remembered the promise she just made to her mom who had just passed. At that moment, she gathered the contents and threw it away. She never spoke to anyone about it but Philip.

She couldn't fathom the college path with the promise she made. Though her mother had passed, the promise was etched in stone in her memory.

"I anoint you to do great things . . ." She heard his voice and remembered the sign of the cross.

But that promise wavered. It had been years since she made it. That promise made her miserable. At the time she chose an easier path -- hair school. She didn't travel far for her studies. She studied at the local beauty school. It was blocks from her home?-- maybe a 10 minute walk. She settled into a local beauty shop and settled into the "regulars" who came in weekly for a shampoo and set.

This regimentation was mundane and died decades ago. She admitted to Philip that she had many chances to switch to hair salons up north where styles were contemporary and fresh. She'd learn more there, but she stayed "safe" at the local beauty shop out of loyalty to her customers and to her family.

This memory hit her hard. She was closing?in on 50 and saw how life passed her by. She got sucked in to a promise that spat "guilt" in her face. It drained her. She took a good look at herself and realized that some changes were necessary. She called up the college that accepted her. Although it was years, they suggested that she come in and talk to a guidance counsellor and financial aid advisor to see how they could help her. She willingly took that first step. Although she still needed to work, the college gave her free tuition for 2 classes. The stipulation was she had to maintain a B average to continue. Although it was a challenge and a step into uncharted waters, she pursued her dream of being a social worker. Not so surprisingly, her body image changed into something that was classier.

Philip recognized how his anointing was a?constant?and how his presence impacted people. He constantly gave God praise (and his father too) for the legacy that followed. He began dating and did it with a?purpose. He wanted to attain the loving relationship his parents had. He had to let go of being the professional student.

Commentary:?In this short story we see the impact that validation and anointing have from family and God/Spirit. We also see how relationships impact positive changes years down the road.

1) Are you Philip or Anna right now?

2) What is your anointing right now? Are you in or out of it?

3) What people or friendships do you need to end or pursue? Why?

4) How is your connection to God/Spirit right now? Is a connection to the Divine something that you're pursuing daily?

(c) Bob Roza, All rights reserved. Names, places and some situations have been changed to protect the participants. In truth, this is the series of events as they happened. For more information, visit: https://bob-time.com or contact Bob at [email protected]