Ancient History? A wake up call anno 2018. Football and the Church...

Last night I spent a wonderful hour with my good friend Paul and his lovely wife Gisela. One of our subjects was: why do I coach and to whom. To answer these questions I invite you to visit my website or to read my LinkedIN profile carefully. But we came a lot further in this discussion: I re-named why I want to contribute my energy to the LGBTI community...

In Holland a big discussion started about being gay and football. Mr Johan D., a wellknown person in dutch football-world, communicated right out loud that gay men shouldn't be that childish about their difficulties in coming-out. The stories about their coming-out Mr Johan D. mentioned them as howly-stories, kind of lozer-stories.

Fortunately lots of people were shocked about these remarks. But to me the thought came up: enough people showed up with a 'non-agreed'? I dare to doubt about this...and that shocks me, anno 2018. The word 'Courage' has a meaning in itself. I am attached to this word. In my educations, ACT Acceptance & Commitment Therapy and Brave Leader Brené Brown Education & Research, courage is a keyword. We all agree saying 'coming out takes a lot of courage'. I would like to add: giving clearness about the remark of Johan D. also takes courage. 'Clear is kind', quote from 'Dare to Lead' Brené Brown. So how about this last case of courage...

One of the people who made his opinion very clear, in public, is the great dutch columnist/writer Mr Rick van der Made. Rick happens to be a very close friend. I was so proud of him reading his article in 'De Gaykrant' about the remarks of Mr Johan D. With a true and sagacious analysis he serves us all about what really happens now, in Holland, and abroad. Rick expanded the meaning of his analysis much broader, now travelling in the USA where he meets lots of social hot issues. 'Open your eyes' could be a good statement underlining his article. Rick and me are creating a program together with the big theme 'Living to your Values'. To be continued...but his columns are a big source of inspiration to me.

But this wasn't all for now. Anno 2018 there is a lot of work to do. It is rather obvious that social life makes steps backwords instead of forward: homophobic behaviour is increasing. I dare to say this without any doubt. That worries me. As a coach, I want to serve everybody of course/groups and individuals, but especially as you may understand now: gay men and gay women. In circles as corporate industry, in religions, in families, just you name it.

I am gay myself. Once I was attacked on the street, walking hand in hand with my boyfriend, long ago. Hoping this kind of violence would be the past. But even Pope Franciscus is making steps in a strange direction: didn't we all hoped that this pope would be a human pope, a pope with compassion, love etcetera etcetera! This is what Pope Francisus publicly said on the very same moment as the remarks of Mr Johan D.: "Homosexuality is just a social trendy phenomenon". Now this is even more frightening. A sign of where we live in now. We hoped something else. And the courage to reply on this remark of the pope? Enough? What about compassion, love and respect? I strive living to these values in myself, but that doesn't mean one has to agree with everything... Putting up armors? No, never! But giving a sign about lacks of respect? Yes, of course.

The quote of Paul Morand on top of this article unfortunately represents a rather bitter truth... Work to do. Always. Together. In the next future, in march 2019, I will start inviting people to think with me how to deal with this subject. For now I do hope lots of the ones who read this article will accept my upcoming invitation. Again, to be continued.

Best, Pieter C. Grimbergen