The American Adventure: Part VIII: A Reflective Viewpoint

"Time is free but it's priceless. You can't own it but you can use it. You can't keep it but you can spend it. Once you've lost it, you can never get it back" - Harvey Mackay

May 10th, 2019. The day that marks the halfway point of my college career. How that’s happened, I’ll honestly never know. But here I am, a rising junior. Just four more semesters of my undergraduate journey before I embark upon adult life. So now is probably a good time to reflect upon my past year, and more importantly, where I find myself in today’s world.

‘The Sophomore Slump’: Is it a real thing? Or is it simply a made-up term that allows college kids to cut themselves a bit of slack as they push themselves through college? Well, I suppose that’s up for debate. But for those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept, it essentially refers to the idea that Sophomore year (2nd year) is seen as the most challenging year in college. Personally, I have to admit that this year not only presented challenges in the classroom, but also outside of the classroom. Ironically, this past semester was the most strenuous to date, yet, I still somehow managed to have my best semester academically.

I know that previous posts have indicated that everything appears to have been going swimmingly. However, digging a little deeper, I found myself having to re-evaluate exactly where my trajectory of life was taking me and how I am changing as an individual.

Relationships: Arguably one of the most difficult aspects of daily life to navigate. And I’m not just talking on a romantic level. But rather, the everyday relationships that intertwine our networks. The ability to connect with all types of individuals is something that intrigues yet terrifies me. Admittedly, I am an extrovert—in the conventional sense—and I think that others would be quick to jump to that conclusion as well based purely on the fact that the Leprechaun position requires somewhat of an outgoing nature. Despite this, I see myself as introverted. Not only because I crave isolation as my method of rejuvenated, but also because I thrive of simply being present and in the moment. Of course, this is easier said than done.

Above all, these guys are my life!

Trust has always been an issue for me. It’s one of the most desirable, yet elusive traits that we seek. Our social media platforms would suggest that we have an abundance of individuals to share our struggles with. Although, how many would be willing to crawl with you through your darkest times. After the loss of several incredibly important people to suicide, I believe that these experiences have forced to step outside my comfortable bubble and become vulnerable with others. Whether that is recounting the struggles which I experienced throughout my childhood with my father’s death as part of my Great Speeches class, or exposing my most imperfect weaknesses as openly as possible to potential significant others, leaving it all on the table has now become a norm of sorts for me.

Has such vulnerability backfired? I’d be stupid to say that it hasn’t, and I know it will continue to for the rest of my life. But that doesn’t mean to say that I am going to change this anytime soon. I have tried over and over again to connect with people on so many different levels, and sometimes, it can feel like a slap in the face when things don’t work out. However, it is safe to say that life lessons are definitely being taught, even if they’re being done the hard way. I suppose this very entry allows you just even a small snippet into what I’ve experienced, and probably what many others have as well. No matter what, I’ll keep reaching out first and keep sending random messages in the hope that even just a single message may actually be that one thing that prevents another life being lost.

One of the most consistent features of my college experience has been my dorm, and specifically, my roommates. For Josh, Cole, Jon, and I, living in a quad this year has been nothing short of entertaining to say the least. As someone who likes to go to bed at a reasonable hour by college standards, all those late nights of gaming and TV watching, I wouldn’t change for the world. All of those 2am conversations in which we discuss some of the most ethical debates of our generation, all of our pathetic attempts to become anyway decent at sand volleyball, and all of those late-night runs to the Huddle (convenience store) will forever be etched into the moments that have shaped and defined my college experience. And now, like many other juniors, they’ll be headed off to study abroad for an upcoming semester while I’ll be staying in South Bend! (Maybe it might give Josh more time to work on his Irish accent because that still needs a bit of improvement).

Not surprisingly, I get asked: “Do you miss home?” on a frequent basis. And my answer is always “Yes and no.” (The German language solved this issue by inventing the word “Jein” which constitutes both words). And I say this for several reasons. Throughout my Youth, Violence, and Peace class this semester, we explored the concept of ‘home’ and what its definition is. And truthfully, home is somewhere you feel comfortable and are able to live happily. The term does not refer to just a physical building or where you were born, but it is a term which constantly evolves and changes as we navigate everyday life.

Of course, Derry is always going to be home for me because being with family, coaching amazing kids and ordering the exact same food from the same restaurants is simply irreplaceable. And getting to show Derry Girls to every single person who I meet makes me so proud to come from the Maiden City. (I will unashamedly say that I have watched in excess of 15 times so that I can explain the terminology to my American counterparts). I know what you’re thinking: What about the accent? Admittedly, my accent has shifted because we speak VERY fast, so daily interactions and Leprechaun duties have required me to change it slightly. But the wee Derry lilt is always picked up on.

You can judge for yourself what you think of the accent.

I think what makes the people of Derry so unique is their ability to rally around in times of despair. After the murder of the incredibly talented journalist, Lyra McKee, in March of this year, combined with the very recent arson attack at Holy Family Church, it is clear that the people of Derry stand up when it is most needed. That genuineness and sincerity is something that can never be taught, but rather, it is something which is instilled within the very communities in which I grew up in.

Yet, Notre Dame has also become my home as I’ve grown so attached to a place which has such incredible people, and which is doing phenomenal work to change the world. I am surrounded every day by ambitious individuals who are genuinely striving to make this world a better place than when we entered it. I would simply be incomplete without one or the other.

At the best place with the best people.

One of my favorite things about living in the United States is the ability to have open dialogue, no matter what beliefs one holds. Freedom of speech is arguably one of the most important features of our time (hence, the reason why it’s found in the Constitution). Some may call me ‘brainwashed’ or ‘Americanized’ but without this experience in the United States, my ability to participate in political dialogue would not be as advanced. The current state of political affairs in the UK, particularly in Northern Ireland is absolutely abysmal to say the least. The lack of decisive leadership, respect, and all sense of reason is drawing us to a society in which tolerance is extremely limited. It’s time our politicians got their heads screwed on and realized that their number one priority should be ensuring that they protect the interests of the public before their own.

Traveling on the subway in New York City made me realize a few things. The carriages that I found myself in represented a microcosm of the world outside, with endless nationalities and cultures on display. The exchanges of interactions between individuals, however big or small, all have a lasting impact. Whether it was the somebody shouting at people at 49th street, or somebody giving up their street at Lexington Ave., the subway presented me with the opportunity to reflect on how we are all connected. Admittedly, most people choose to scroll through their news feeds as they made their daily commute. But when the occasion rose, I took full advantage of the opportunity to ask people how their day was going. This not only reminded me of the fact that we shouldn’t take people at face value, but it also reminded me of our ability to really impact the lives of those around us. So always try to put a smile on your face because you never know whose day you will brighten.

For me, one of the most defining moments of my college experience so far was my college seminar: Great Speeches. This class focused on the art of rhetoric and tested each of the students to go outside their comfort zone and perform speeches in front of their classmates, all without notes. A two-minute speech, followed by a five-minute speech, and a final 12-minute speech in the middle of the day in O’Shaughnessy Hall (one of the main academic buildings) certainly presented me with some challenges. None more so than deciding on my final speech topic. And when I sat down and thought thoroughly about what I wanted to speak on, I thought of something which I was passionate about: Sharing the story of my father’s death and my struggles as a young caregiver. Sharing this story felt somewhat strange, yet I am now at the point when I am comfortable being vulnerable with others so that I can hopefully inspire people if they are struggling with things. The end of the speech marked a turning point in my life as I have fully come to terms with what happened, rather than living in denial and sympathy. Instead, I have decided to accept and embrace this as part of my unique story.

One of the biggest differences between the US and Ireland which I have had to deal with has been the weather—and I don’t mean using Fahrenheit rather than Celsius, even though I do use it now. Rather, having to deal with a polar vortex when temperatures dropped as low as -40°C/F (Temperatures even out when it gets to -40°) was not something I thought I would ever have to experience. Nor is it something that I really want to experience beyond college, but I guess I’ll struggle through with it for another two years.

Even in the freezing cold, this place is beautiful!

This weather contrasted drastically to that which I experienced in Tampa Bay, Florida for the NCAA Women’s Basketball National Championship, which was easily one of the highlights of the year. Having seen our team dominate for most of the year, making it to the Championship game was not as straightforward as we probably would have hoped for. Huge halftime deficits to overcome seemed to be the theme of the tournament, but somehow, we always managed to pull it back. Bethune-Cookman, Michigan State, Texas A&M, Stanford, and then UConn all lay in the way of making it to successive Championship games, but thankfully we made it there.

This is how mascots like to relax...

Despite losing the final game by a single point, the experience of pulling on the suit in front of a 20,000 strong crowd and live on national TV is something that cannot be put into words. The traveling Irish faithful were absolutely incredibly from start to finish, and getting to develop personal, meaningful relationships with our fans is why I love doing it. To top it off, getting to spend hours on end with my fellow mascots was such a unique experience which allowed us to basically mess around in the aquarium and on the beach for an ESPN commercial. Not too bad, I guess.

No words...

And this wasn’t the only ESPN commercial which I had the chance to be involved in. In February, I traveled to North Carolina to film for the ACC Network. 10 hours of film culminated in a commercial which has been on ESPN constantly. It still feels pretty weird that I keep seeing myself on TV, but at the same time, it’s something that comes as part of the job, so I just embrace it instead. So then returning to North Carolina for the ACC tournament (our conference: Atlantic Coast Conference) in Greensboro was an absolute dream. Seeing us lift that trophy and being able to meet my family of mascots for the very first time was pretty special. But plenty more memories to come!

Having had a year of Leprechaun under my belt, I cannot deny that it is one of the best decisions which I ever made to transition from soccer to cheerleading. I always get asked if I miss soccer, and of course I do. Seeing guys, I played against at international level now making their mark on the European stage is pretty crazy for sure. But I wouldn’t change a thing. Everything always works out how it is supposed to.

***

Spending Spring Break in Houston with Cole and Josh meant one thing: going to the Houston Rodeo. Now, I know what you’re thinking: Did he wear a cowboy hat? Yes. Yes, I did. Because the Houston Rodeo is one of the most fascinating spectacles that you are likely to ever witness. With millions of attendees every year, it cannot be denied that this 3-week festival is the epitome of success. And getting to see Zac Brown Band and Kings of Leon was the icing on the top of the cake. Even if our flight to Chicago on St. Patrick’s Day was cancelled (meaning we couldn’t see the green river), the week was the perfect opportunity to just take a complete break from school. Followed by a few days in Evanston, IL for Easter with some of my favorite people, my trips this year have been amazing. But by the end of the semester, I was ready for a much longer break.

Spot the European with the skinny jeans...

Following the semester, I had the opportunity to spend time in South Carolina, New Jersey, New York and LA with some of my favorite people. It would be an understatement to say that I have the traveling bug. Getting to see the sights in all of these places felt pretty surreal and genuinely. How does a kid from Derry find himself traveling all around the US and across the world? Every day I wonder how I made it to where I am today. When I list the places that I have traveled, it doesn’t really feel real. Yet, there are so many more places that I want to see and things that I want to do.

So that brings me to Sydney, Australia, where I am currently writing this latest edition. I am working with Disability Sports Australia who are “Australia’s peak national body representing athletes with a physical disability.” During my time here, I will be helping to facilitate the National Wheelchair Rugby Championships as well as researching and developing potential new programs for children with disabilities. It’s right up my street so I’m super excited to get started with things. (We’ll have another installment after Sydney!)

For the next two months, I’ll be living in two different hostels. Brave? Stupid? Adventurous? Maybe a few other things come to mind but after a few days of living here I fully believe it was one of the best decisions that I made. Getting to meet other young people from across the world in such a short period of time is absolute gold. Or even the fact that you meet guys from Portrush and Derry, who are staying in the same hostel—the guy from Derry lives literally like 5 minutes from my house—it’s a small world for sure.  

The opportunities which I have been given, and the experiences which I have had, I could not be more grateful of. However, I have an incessant desire to keep growing, to keep evolving, and to keep pushing myself to do more, to see more, to become more. The brevity of life cannot be taken for granted; therefore, I am making the most of every single opportunity that comes my way!

Until next time…

Conal x