Amazing and hilarious places in India

I have traveled in about 60% of India. Every time I #travel, I #discover new things, dialects, cultures, hidden facts and more. Here are a few interesting, amazing and hilarious places.

#Karnataka, my home state, is quite famous for its very accommodating people. People from many regions and countries stay here and English is the lingua-franca! The climate is a great plus! Most intricate temple carvings in India are found in Karnataka. In Bangalore, it is as if every other person is an #entrepreneur. #Bangalore, though, is the #traffic jam capital of India. The #administration cannot let go of its nuisance of adding speed-breakers on roads almost every 10 metres. #Politicians have stolen public money by making the city #airport road a toll way, in the name of public-private-partnership! #BBMP is the biggest public sector #mafia in India. The plight of Bangalore is because of #criminal politicians and BBMP. If BBMP officials are banished to #Pakistan, the #corruption levels in both countries may reduce.

#tamilnadu Tamil Nadu is the place in India where I found most people to be very #hardworking. In a 3 star #hotel, freshly prepared #buffet breakfast (with about 30 items) will be ready at 7 AM. English works well here too. Contrast this with #Delhi; most hotel staff will be groggy and scratching themselves at that time of the day. #Chennai hasn't had a #municipal #corporation for decades and that's probably the secret to quick moving traffic! And all over TN, local drivers have honked repeatedly when they see my Karnataka registered car!

#Kerala is a funny place of many juxtapositions. It's fad for Middle-East jobs is well-known. Someone once joked that all that were needed to produce a #Malayalam #movie were water, a boat, a coconut tree and a wraplon (sarong, dhoti, mundu...). A Malayali colleague said to me jocularly that #productivity in Kerala was low because half the time was spent in rolling up the dhoti and the other half in rolling down! English works, with a Malayali accent. Like its fellow red state West Bengal, things sometimes don't move. Malayalis are very #enterprising. It is said that a Malayali-owned #business can be found in any country. Kerala has amazingly sold itself as the "#ayurvedic #tourism destination"!

#Mumbai is the most #punctual and #professional in #business matters. Rainy season here can be hell. Native #Mumbaikers are born with #trainspotting #skills! Everyone seems to be on an #adrenaline rush to catch the next local train, forever on the move, to probably nowhere. I read that among the metro cities in India, Mumbai had the lowest life expectancy. This may have changed now, owing to #pollution in Delhi, Bangalore and the nuveau riche fads like exercising a lot while sleeping less. I found #Pune menacingly #orthodox. For Punekars, #Bakerwadi is sacrosanct.

#Kolkata is the coolest of the places. This is probably the only city on #Earth where you can converse with anyone on any topic at any time of the day / night for any duration; #communism, #football / #soccer, #politics, #poetry, #culture, #STEM - you name it! English works quite OK. Someone joked that #weekends begin in Kolkata on Mondays! This is one place where one can say "I will live at my slow pace". Metro rail is still amazing. The #rupee goes a very long way. #Inflation may have given West Bengal a pass!

Delhi is the capital of cons, touts and fixers. Here, every non-entity claims to be "#connected" to some politician and claims "can get anything done". The newest menace is air pollution, courtesy of the "#Monsanto #law". Traffic moves quite quickly. Metro is quite good! Surprisingly or not, English doesn't go a long way. Once, when my #flight landed in Delhi #airport, the pilot announced "It appears the airport does not know our flight has landed. Now the staff are looking for a bay to park and searching for the #aerobridge operating crew.". Just anything can happen in Delhi! #NCR is just an #urban #desert with the added nuisance of #consumerism.

The North East is diverse and beautiful. Life moves at a healthy pace. The one common attribute is the calmness of people here. On hilly roads, drivers do not mind reversing to let the opposite vehicle pass. English works easily in many places! Apparently Bihari barbers earn great incomes creating #funky #hairstyles for the local boys there. There are wonders like natural root bridges #rootbridges and a clean village. The #tribal museum in #Shillong is #worldclass. It is amazingly #green! What is an even more amazing experience? One can see #Mount #Everest and other peaks on a clear day, when flying #Delhi-#Guwahati or Delhi-#Bagdogra sectors. Smart pilots also announce this during the flight. I have been lucky to have seen many times!!!

#Uttarakhand, #Himachal Pradesh, are mesmerizing, with the mighty #Himalayas, mineral rich water and therefore great tasting vegetables & fruits. Generally people are calm here too and life moves at a slow pace. Eating freshly harvested apples (hawkers bring them to the markets in the evenings) and many other fruits, is an unmatched #sensory experience. #Manikaran has a working #utopian #Gurdwara! The views of Himalayas from Uttarakhand are sights to behold.

#uttarpradesh Uttar Pradesh is one where you get to hear "#Hindi". #Lucknow is famous for its "#Nawabi #tehzeeb"! Again, there are many beautiful natural and holy sights to visit. Surprisingly, it is not very expensive for a tourist. English goes only some way.

#Odisha is beautiful with its natural wonders and human created sites like #Konark, #Puri and #Bhubaneswar. Rupee goes a long way here too. Somehow, one gets a feeling that time stood still in these places. English here too does not get much far.

#madhyapradesh Madhya Pradesh and #Rajasthan are two states which are difficult to cover in one tour. There are too many places to visit. Both have humongous #royal #heritage buildings, #forts, #palaces and #museums. Food (I'm from a totally #vegetarian family) is quite good and travel amenities are quite abundant.

#Gujarat is yet again difficult to cover in one tour, especially because Gujarat is a melting pot of cultures - #Hindus, #Muslims and #Parsees. Vegetarian food is abundantly available and can be good if one likes to eat everything #sweet. I remember #Jalebis hung by threads in front of #restaurants early in the morning! Apparently, Gujarati cities are quite safe to travel. Palaces, forts and #temple architectures are astonishing. India's second best royal museum is probably the one in #Vadodara.

#Punjab is one state where one can have an overdose of hospitality. It all begins with the greatest open source kitchen on earth - the one at Harmandir Sahib Gurdwara in Amritsar.

#Haryana is quite an interesting state, totally undersold in tourism. It is here that you can find the "Dwaipayana / Vaishampayana" pond in #Kurukshetra. Apparently India's second longest cave (after the one in #Meghalaya) is found in Haryana. English doesn't go much distance. I have heard that the museum in Kurukshetra was very good, but couldn't visit. People here said to me that they prioritize #sports over #education; I have no #data either way.

#Andaman archipelago - believe me it is a #paradise. It is expensive and touristy, but still exceedingly #charming. The sight of green islands emerging from the sea while the aircraft reaches Port Blair #portblair, is unforgettable. You can see this archipelago, not as close though, when you fly from Sri Lanka #srilanka to #Malaysia. As early as 2001, many islands had #banned #plastic.

My recent addition is #Chattisgadh. Someone there told me a very poignant thing. "CG is a tribal state. These tribals are innocent and so the crime rate is low. Most crimes are committed by outsiders, like the #illegal #Bangladeshi #immigrants who come here through WB". I don't know the veracity of this claim. However, many others too told me that CG has a very low #crime rate and that #Raipur is famous for wooden furniture.

I have been to undivided #Andhra Pradesh many times. The Salar Jung Museum in #Hyderabad is probably the largest royal museum in India. The vegetarian food is rich in spices (specifically the chillies) and is an ideal place for lovers of rice. Hotels often serve unlimited rice in meals. English works! Seasons can be particularly harsh.

#Goa is perennially touristy place. The locals totally chill out and may not work much part of the year on the pretext of #rains. It has its own set of #Portugal #colonial laws - like a wife becoming a half-owner of the husband's #properties immediately upon wedding! Do you remember why Manyata Dutt a.k.a Dilnawaz Sheikh a.k.a Sara Khan married Sanjay Dutt there? Their Goan marriage was later annulled by a #court as neither had a Goan #lineage. I am told by a Goan that native Goans also end up paying touristy prices on every #service they consume. I have saved the best for the last: Kolkata is extremely #workaholic compared to Goa.

I am fortunate to have #great #friends in all these places and more!

What's your favourite? I love to hear. Comment on!