Am I Looking for the Good or Bad?

Have you ever doubted that God could ever bring good out of a hard season in your life?

I’ve learned a lot since my devastating detour into deception from 1999 to 2012. It was that decade plus of spiritual abuse that left me emotionally, mentally, spiritually and financially destroyed and almost ready to give up on my faith.

Thank God He didn’t let me walk away from Himself and helped me come to a place of recognizing that He does His best work in the hard things and the fall out of our own bad decisions.

That led me on an adventure to begin asking the question, "What are You trying to teach me?" during each hard circumstance presented in my life. My first question to Him after my detour was "Lord, what was it that made me vulnerable to such extreme deception?" I longed to own whatever my part was in the entire debacle.

Now maybe it is partly because of the strong reaction I naturally have toward those who blame everyone else for their challenges and difficult circumstances, which sometimes are just a consequence of their own bad behavior or decisions. It always seems so obvious to me that what they should be doing is considering they may be the cause!

And so, as He showed me many ways that my own disobedience was at the root of that 13 years of devastation, being able to repent for my sin and fully take ownership of where it led me was a game changer for me, as it began a new, fresh, and emotionally healthy way forward.

As I watched my growing obedience and desire to fully trust the sovereignty of God knowing that no matter how bad my circumstance, He is always faithful and the Romans 8:28 God I know Him to be. One who will always, always, always IN ALL THINGS work good from the bad ... for everyone? Nope, not at all. For those of us who love Him and are called according to His purposes.

So how has this changed how I view struggles in my business or life as a pastor's wife, challenges that seem daunting or perhaps even like a spiritual attack? Well, that question, "Lord what are You teaching me through this?" gets me focused on His character ... His goodness and faithfulness and love for me. He never wastes our pain and always has a lesson for us if we are looking for it (instead of looking for someone else to blame, or a way to minimize our responsibility).

Would you share how you've struggled to see Him in everything and His character at work to bring good out of bad in your life? I think it helps if we know we're not alone in this!