Am I Addicted To My Job?

How do you know when you’re addicted to something?

I’m not “asking for a friend”, either.

I think I’m addicted to work.

When 2023 began, I declared it to be the year of expansion. I’d spent most of 2022 grinding my way through the often soul-sucking querying process for my first novel and had unconsciously shunted many of my usual work targets to one side.

As a result, I felt like I was finishing the year on the back foot and hadn’t achieved as much as I’d originally intended.

2023 was going to be different.

Yes, the war in Ukraine was still going on, though it was in a temporary winter-induced stalemate; yes, we were all still in the midst of a financial crisis in the UK, and average Working Joes like myself were feeling the pinch.

The future didn’t exactly look bright.

Nevertheless, 2023 was going to be different.

So with the New Year rung in, I set about establishing some new goals and methods for achieving them.

The Year of Growth

I set up an affiliate programme for my online store and quickly gathered a small army of brand ambassadors to promote Trek NI’s eco-friendly gear (buy some, you’ll love it).

I dove headlong into YouTube, aiming to write, record, edit and produce up to four videos every week (this didn’t really start until March and I’m very much still learning as I go).

I devoted a chunk of each working day to actively growing my online writing community, WIPpitch, while continuing to work on my Twitter presence.

I tried TikTok again.

I joined more social media platforms than ever before.

I continued writing every morning (still ongoing), tap-tap-tapping my way through my fourth novel.

And on top of all that, I worked relentlessly on improving the systems and routines that were already in place for my main source of income, Trek NI.

Social media, email marketing, content production. You name it, I was doing it, and then some.

And what’s more, I was enjoying it, perhaps more than I ever had before.

Yes, things were slow — that’s always the way when you’re starting something new (or rather, adding a bunch of new things to what you’re already doing) — but I didn’t mind.

I’m well accustomed to the snail-like pace of small business growth as a solopreneur and know that I’m playing the long game in almost every arena.

So 2023 had improved in one major way over the previous twelve months, at least. Even if work was tough and slow and often riddled with discouraging obstacles, I was enjoying it more than ever.

What I didn’t realise for a long time is that I was also becoming addicted to it.

I asked ChatGPT what the typical characteristics of an addict were and was mildly horrified to discover how many boxes I ticked.

Diagnosis: Worker

“Compulsive behavior: Addicts often engage in repetitive and uncontrollable behaviors related to their addiction. They may feel a strong urge or craving for the substance or activity and have difficulty controlling or stopping their engagement in it.” (ChatGPT)

I constantly find myself gravitating back to work activities when I’m supposed to be done for the day.

It’s far too easy to do when you work from home and your computer is right there.

If you asked me to do absolutely no work for just one day — to not even think about work — I’m fairly certain I couldn’t do it.

“Physical and psychological dependence: Addicts may develop a physical and psychological dependence on the substance or behavior. They may experience withdrawal symptoms when attempting to quit or reduce their consumption.” (ChatGPT)

This one’s a bit more of a stretch, but it still applies.

My stress levels definitely creep up when something gets in the way of my usual work routine. On the flipside, the dopamine rush I get from checking something off my list is too good to turn down.

Withdrawal symptoms? Not quite, but I rarely stop working long enough to find out.

“Increased tolerance: Over time, addicts may need larger amounts of the substance or engage in more intense behaviors to achieve the desired effect. This increased tolerance can lead to a cycle of escalating consumption.” (ChatGPT)

This one may not fit the analogy at all, but it’s not a million miles off.

My work load rarely reduces, and if some task or project does get completed, I tend to instantly replace it with something else rather than enjoy the free time.

“Neglected responsibilities: Addiction can cause individuals to neglect their personal, professional, and social responsibilities. They may prioritize their addiction over important obligations, leading to conflicts and consequences in various areas of life.” (ChatGPT)

Ok, I can’t hide from this one.

I’ve for sure chosen work over socialising on many occasions. In fairness, I’m an introverted only child who enjoys his own company, so it’s easy to skip out on face-to-face situations.

That one’s probably the most damaging.

“Obsession and preoccupation: Addicts often think obsessively about their substance or behavior of choice. It may become the primary focus of their thoughts, leading to a preoccupation that can interfere with daily functioning.” (ChatGPT)

Again, 100%.

I wake up thinking about work. I go to bed thinking about work.

The only time I don’t think about work is when I can’t — that is, when I’m exercising (I have to listen to podcasts about TV shows to switch my brain off) and when I’m asleep.

Geez, when you lump them all together like this…

“Loss of control: Addicts may find it challenging to control or moderate their consumption or engagement in the addictive behavior. They may make unsuccessful attempts to quit or cut back but find themselves returning to it.” (ChatGPT)

Once again, this manifests itself in my tendency to replace free time with more work.

I could make more of an effort to work less.

But there are two reasons why I don’t.

Firstly, I’m building something. I’m shooting for that long-term passive income target and it all has to start somewhere.

Work doesn’t start out passive and in truth, few achieve that ultimate goal.

But if I really want future financial freedom and stability, I have to grind now, in the present.

Secondly, I enjoy my job.

I’m entirely self-employed. I do what I want, how I want, when I want (did I mention I’m an only child?).

They say if you love what you do you’ll never work a day in your life and it does feel that way sometimes, especially on the amazing days when you nail that big win.

I have an inquisitive, problem-solving mind, too, so I derive genuine enjoyment from overcoming challenges. And I’ve faced many challenges since the pandemic hit.

So the big question is this — is it wrong to enjoy your work?

I’d say no, it’s not.

I hear friends and family talk about their jobs and honestly, some of them sound like they absolutely hate what they do.

They’re there to earn a living and that’s it. The moment five o’clock rolls around, they’re outta there.

Working for yourself is a privilege, even on the slowest, toughest, how-do-I-pay-the-bills sort of days. If I can enjoy it during the hard times, the good times will be so much sweeter.

But I need to keep this “addiction” in check.

Times won’t always be tough, and when they aren’t, I need to be able to step back and switch off.

So many things are infinitely more important than work and they need to be enjoyed, too.

I love what I do, but I love my wife (and dogs) more.

Striking that fine balance between work and life is the real challenge.

And like I said, I like a challenge.

What about you?

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