There will always be unfinished business in life….

Consider the beautiful tapestry of life. An ostensibly organised life would inevitably look very different if you looked at the wrong side of the tapestry....... The foundations of a beautiful life are laid on loose ends. Indeed, life is always an unfinished business and full of loose ends. Things that don’t go as planned, goals that are left unfinished and may never find fruition, relationships that fade away or left in limbo, questions that remain unanswered and may perhaps never find an answer. Sometimes we feel frustrated, anxious, or guilty about these loose ends. We think we should have done more, tried harder, or been better. We wonder what could have been, what should have been, or what might have been.

But what if we could learn to embrace the loose ends in life? What if we could see them as opportunities, not failures? What if we could appreciate them as part of the journey, not the destination? What if we could change our perspective and see life as a work in progress?

Here are some ways to do that:

• Accept that loose ends are inevitable.?No matter how much we plan, prepare, or work, we can’t control everything in life. There will always be unexpected events, changes, or challenges that disrupt our plans or expectations. There will always be people who change their minds, or we might change our minds about them. Instead of resisting or resenting these loose ends, we can accept them as part of life and move on and forward with grace, humility, and courage. We can live with these loose ends and its absolutely alright. We do not need to understand everything in life as to why it unfolded that way or to try to justify it to anyone or even ourselves if some business remained unfinished.
• Focus on that you have done and achieved, do not dwell on what you could not (yet).?Sometimes we get so caught up in what we haven’t achieved or completed that we forget to acknowledge what we have done. We overlook our progress, our efforts, and our achievements. We compare ourselves to others or to unrealistic standards. Instead of dwelling on the negative, we can celebrate the positive and be proud of ourselves for what we have accomplished. It brings much needed self-esteem and positivity to carry on what we still can. We need to let go of the negativity of what wasn’t meant to be, to progress what can still be done. We cannot get there by remaining here.
• Let go of perfectionism and embrace imperfection.?Sometimes we create loose ends by setting unrealistic or unattainable goals for ourselves or others. We strive for perfection and end up feeling frustrated, disappointed, or inadequate when we fall short. Instead of aiming for perfection, we can aim for excellence and improvement. We can recognize that imperfection is part of being human and that it can be beautiful and valuable. Perfectionism always comes at the cost of time and sometimes relationships.
• Find meaning and purpose in the loose ends.?Sometimes we feel lost or confused by the loose ends in life. We wonder what they mean, what they teach us, or what they lead us to. Instead of seeing them as meaningless or random, we can see them as opportunities for learning and growth. We can ask ourselves what they reveal about ourselves, our values, or our passions. We can use them as inspiration or motivation for our next steps.

I remember as a child when we built sandcastles on the beach, we gave our heart and soul to the activity, to make the best creation possible with intricate detail. We did it simply to enjoy the process and for the fun of it. Once we had finished, we would sometimes destroy the creation ourselves by stomping our feet all over the sandcastle deliberately, simply for the fun of it. We were never attached or entangled with the possession of it. Indeed, sometimes, an unexpected wave or an early tide would wash it away right before our eyes and we simply laughed. We always knew that sandcastles were just that, like writings on the sand, meant to be erased or to remain unfinished. What if we entered into life and with everything that we do, with a contractual understanding, that it could be left unfinished or be destroyed, and that its just fine. The question would then be, did we learn enough, did we enjoy enough, and did we grow enough.

Amid our busy lives, lets catch our breath. Let’s remind ourselves that we are a verb, an activity, we are always in process, and that there is always more to be done. Let’s not let the incompleteness weigh on our spirit, but rather see it as a source of strength and possibility. Let’s be grateful and be appreciative of the beauty and mystery of life. Let’s celebrate the potential of the incomplete. Whenever, we feel overwhelmed or dissatisfied with our life, let’s shift our mindset and attitude towards life and its unfinished business. Loose ends are not something to be feared or avoided. They are something to be embraced and appreciated. They make us who we are and help us become who we yet want to be.

So next time you encounter a loose end in life, don’t let it stress you out or bring you down. Instead, smile and say: “Yes, life is full of loose ends, and yes, I am OK with that.”

My Life's Work

Relentless and persevering in life I was

With the knife of ambition

Firmly held with determination in my hand

Bringing into reality the image of myself

I had etched in my mind

Into this wooden sculpture now in front of me.

No, I am not quite finished as yet

Even as this work of art

Is almost the narrative of me

The bust that I have created myself

Is not quite the construct I originally imagined.

For over the years of chipping away?at this wooden bust?

My self-image and my growing self-awareness

Looked each other in the eye?

And negotiated some necessary amendments?

To this commissioned piece of work.

As I now look upon my life’s work thus far?

And I reflect on who I am?

And who I as yet could have become

I slowly realize

That this not the end of me.

That I still have the opportunity?

Through the labor of my love?

To place the final touches.?

For as long as there is life?

There is the luxury of time?

To work on the flaws?

Or to accept them.

Dr Manpreet Gulati.