Always believe in honestly doing your karma

Do good things and good things will follow you. First of all, what happens with people who hurt me, is not in my control. I am neither their conscience keeper nor their moral compass and its not my job to ensure they get punished for being assholes. People play the roles they want to play, and if they choose to play an asshole, that's about it. I cannot do anything about it, but what is in my control, is how I choose to let or not let their tomfoolery define my life. When you bear grudges against people who hurt you, you allow them to take up space in your life.

The moment you disassociate from them, saying that “ This person is toxic for me, and I need to stand up for myself now, I need to protect myself now", you remove them out of your picture. The moment you do that, its over. Now whether they die, or live, or get punished or instead flourish, is none of your business, because its not your picture. Yes, there is a feeling of vindication, when you see someone who hurt you suffer, and pay for their actions , directly or indirectly, I will not deny that. But that joy never lasts long term. Because Karma is not about them. Karma is about you and your picture. Karma is going through absolute shit hell, and coming back right up like a queen.

Switching the phone to airplane mode. I was in emotional pain. Walking depressed towards the bus stand. I sat down quietly, thinking about the things that were pressurizing me. Couldn’t think of anything else. I was on the brink of crying, just then a poor boy appeared. “Please brother, give me something to eat. I’m hungry.” From his looks, I could see he was starving for days. He was lean, around 15 years old. His eyes were pale, his hands trembled even when he was holding my hand. But his eyes were already filled with tears, unlike mine.

I searched my pant pocket, Found 100?. Gave him immediately without a second thought. 100? was all I had that moment. So didn’t have anything else to give. There was a supermarket in front of the bus stand. I told him to buy some snacks there for now and save 50? for later. He bought some snacks. He came towards me. His gloomy face turned to joyous. He folded both his hands and said Thanks Anna (Brother). I was glad that I could make someone’s life joyful even if it is for a day. Days passed on.

I was really hungry. I didn’t eat that afternoon. So decided to go out and get some snacks. I saw the same supermarket and decided to buy some snacks for myself. Went ahead and got some snacks loaded in the cart. When I was about to bill, I checked my pocket. Unfortunately, I had only 10 ? Forgot to bring my wallet. So I decided to buy some cool drinks. I told them to bill the cool drinks alone. The owner of the shop saw this commotion and came sternly towards me. He was sitting in a near distance from the cashier. So he heard the entire conversation. He said, “Brother, You did really make that small boy’s life joyful that day, Why don’t I return the pleasure?” I was moved to tears. I didn’t have much to say. I hesitated to take, But he being stubborn didn’t bill me that day. Yes, I believe in karma.

Karma gives people an illusion of justice or fairness, when the world by and large is completely and utterly unfair. Even before I learned about Just-world hypothesis, I find the entire premise of Karma ridiculous. People said: don't do bad things because Karma will get you. That's just utilitarianism, isn't it? So You do good things because Karma will reward you, not because it is the right thing to do; you don't do bad things because Karma will punish you, not because it is against your own personal principle and it might hurt other people. I have similar despise for the heaven and hell system of most religions.

And when you see something wrong, instead of speaking up and stepping up to fight against it, you hide and tell yourself "Karma will get him!" I can't wait for Karma to work, if something is wrong, I need to speak up. When I make decisions I need to be true to my own principle regardless what "Karma" would or would not do. Chinese are huge on this entire karma thing, we have hundreds of different proverbs and phrases to express "what goes around comes around". I find it rather sickening, because I rarely see it act positively. People whine about bad things, and yet none of them do anything about it because "Karma will get the bad guys! they'll get what they deserve!" I hate it. You can't rely one some cosmic force to do your own work.

And the worst part of "Karma", it empowers the concept of victim blaming. If Karma does exist, bad things cannot happen to good people. In other words, if bad things happened to you, you must have done something to deserve it. I saw it all the time in domestic violence cases and rape cases. People talked about it online, while there're much compassion for those victims, some people always say something like "well, they must have done something to deserve that". So no. I don't believe in Karma. I don't believe HIV positive babies had done something to deserve their fate. I don't believe women being beat up by their husband because they have done something wrong in their lives. And I certainly won't wait for Karma to get to the bad guys if I can do something about it, even if its just speaking up.

It was Tuesday and the evening prayer at the temple just ended. People were receiving blessings from the priest and offering gifts and money in the donation box. As I was about to turn around and move out, someone from behind tapped on my shoulder in that crowded temple. He passed a Rs 500 note to me and I put it in the donation box on his behalf. A Rs. 500 note in the brand new “mint condition”. Now I started feeling guilty of deceiving God as I offered a tarnished & defiled note in the donation box. Upon exit from the temple, I approached that man and appreciated him for his generosity. “You have great faith in God and a really big heart.

Not everyone makes such generous donations”, I said. He looked confused and perplexed. “You are the one who gave me that Rs. 500 note to put in the donation box..Aren’t you ?” I asked. He smiled and said “ No. That note fell out of your back pocket. I just picked it up and returned it to you.” Instant Karma. It was my turn now and I pulled out a soiled currency note of Rs 10 from my back pocket and put it in the donation box. I was carrying that note with me for last one week as no one was ready to accept it in the market. It was torn and soiled, but I knew that God is almighty and he will manage it somehow. Cheers!