Alone and Lost
no one wherever I go sees me.
their eyes just look through me.
and likewise my eyes don't see them, but look beyond them to what comes next.
without this personal contact I have no love and as a result I am a lost soul.
so I must abandon my journey and seek affirmation in other eyes.
confirmation of my value based on social achievement scales like:
my bank account.
how much I can drink.
my ability to relate to and explain the latest song or technology.
or the most popular comparison metric:
penis length.
:)
and in missing this affirmation I turn to the songs of the day.
my heart is wrenched and torn.
I hear endlessly how I must be holding my dear one.
How its Christmas again and she is back in my arms.
How Carolina couldn't be finer on any morning.
And about the scale of my troubles yesterday....
when they were far away.
:)
I spent many days in that place.
Looking for women's eyes to make my life whole.
For the required companion on the road.
I even resigned myself to the fact that my lover might be a man as a woman never came along.
:)
I spent many days believing .... that I was alone and lost.
:)
Something changed.
I accepted Jesus as my savior! ( sorry that's a joke!! )
I accepted myself as I am.
And I accepted ideas as powerful shapers of how I conduct my life.
As a result, I looked at who gave me these ideas and how they want me to live.
And they want me to be married or in a relationship or depressed.
Because that allows them the best social control.
The highest percentage "to procreate" and "be controlled by the offspring's upbringing" in the school and social system.
Or I can be "self cursed" and "lacking love"
Or as the title says: "Alone and Lost"
:)
Everyday now I walk and listen.
To everyone inside the packaged society.
And I can't hear what they say.
But I do see them lost in eachother's eyes.
And walking hand in hand.
And I wonder if they are seeking the affirmation that was not there for me.
I wonder if they ever find it.
Or if they are just finding their way through the packaged society again and again...
Until they get to where I was.....
With no one to meet them.
:)
And that they have to find the affirmation from within.
To love their projects and shine the light on them that is inside.
To know that the condition called Alone never exists.
But also that "being with others" doesn't exist either.
As we are both alone and with others all the "time."
Same condition, never changes.
As a result .... lost is meaningless.
Like so much else in this society.
:)
When alone and lost are gone.
Maybe you can start to see that the condition of existence remains constant.
Love is constant.
Existence is constantly in love in the same amount.
And your projects are what builds the structures you operate with.
This is why YOUR projects are the most important thing.
FOR you.
And because you are here with the others who are here now...
They are VERY interested in seeing your passions come true.
For the seed they would get from you for themselves from your success is why we are all here at the same breath.
:)
As always I encourage everyone to pursue their passions.
Your passions are important to me.
Please send me a note.
How can I help you.
If you want to tell others about your passions I have a two hour radio program on Sunday EST 9 - 10pm each week.
My email address is [email protected]
Please like or comment if you like this article.
For my self affirmation. HAHAHAHAHA!!!