Be the Ally every woman hopes you will be.

We always hear it takes a village to raise a child. I think it also takes a village to get a fledgling graduate to a long career. That path includes a lot of inspiration, sponsors and mentors. Today though I want to talk about the importance of an ally and how to be a great ally, especially for women trying to make it up the corporate ladder. Conscious and unconscious biases, programs that are not ideally built for female employees, promotion criteria that are weighted unfairly to the majority are just some of the elements women need to navigate. A strong ally can offer a different vantage point, a larger network and can provide valuable air cover that can do wonders as women navigate these situations. Let’s talk about how to be a great ally.

Let me start with a story from my past. One of my toughest times involved being the only female executive in a fairly large team with a plethora of conscious biases that were not penetrable by logic, exemplary performance or persistence. Just days away from giving in and quitting, I got a call from a senior executive, a leader I had worked for before. He had been observing the situation from a distance.

He did three things that exemplify a great ally -

First – He analyzed the situation with me - validating my work and strategy. He also shared information about the people dynamics and bigger picture that I had no way of knowing. That move not only gave me confidence, but also another vantage point that helped me figure out how I could better navigate the situation.

Second – He expanded my network by introducing me with a very strong recommendation to another executive, who was part of the broader group but not someone I knew at that point.?It provided a support structure and someone who could give me real-time advice and watch my back, i.e. he created another ally for me who was more directly involved in my project. It bolstered my courage to keep going and feel less alone.

Third - Probably the most important, and one that I did not find out about for a couple of years after it had happened. From his position of power, he had my back in HR reviews. So, I was not marginalized and he used it as a way to point out the culture issues in that part of the organization to a broader group. Both helping me, and helping to change the culture in the larger organization. To me, I just saw changes in people and structure, and slowly but surely, the broader organization had a better culture of transparency, authenticity and an appreciation for diversity.

That leader not only helped me privately but also publicly, he did not see it as helping just one person he knew, but saw it as a chance to improve a situation that would help others over time and the culture of the organization. He did it all proactively because he saw someone struggle for all the wrong reasons when she should not have had to. He demonstrated everything one would hope for in an ally and more. I moved on from that role with a deep sense of respect for the leader, a few good friends who helped me through a tough year, and a much deeper sense of resilience that has helped me ever since. None of which was possible without the ideal ally.

My hope as I share this story is that it inspires a lot of you to be visible, vocal and proactive allies as there are still a lot of women and other minority groups that need that village of mentors, sponsors and amazing allies to help navigate their aspiring careers.