All it takes is an EAR TO LISTEN.
CHANGE... Feeling More Included In 2023
Change only happens when we start to listen more than we speak. “The only way to eliminate unconscious biases is to listen more deliberately when someone speaks,” PRACTICE, “listening to what details they give you and have a conversation.
Don’t try to box someone’s identity based on what you believe to be markers of said identities.”
Before you ask personal questions, be willing to get to know someone better. “The best we can do for ourselves and historical injustices goes far beyond asking where someone is really from. Better questions surround whom they want to be, what their aspirations are, and what specific needs you can help them with,” Instead of inquiring about someone’s background, ask, “What is it that you’d like me to know about you?”
Levels of Listening
·??????Ignoring Listening
·??????Pretending Listening
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·??????Selective Listening
·??????Attentive Listening
·??????Empathetic Listening
When we empathically listen, we immerse ourselves in understanding how the other person thinks and feels. We actively push our perspective out of our minds and heart and instead try to walk with them, see as they see, and feel as they feel.
Don’t insist. Apologize if they seem hurt or uncomfortable. If you ask something that you immediately regret, could you address it? Say, “I’m sorry if I crossed a line there. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t feel comfortable.” If someone doesn’t respond positively to you, understand that they may not be willing to address the question and let it go.
Be Sincere
Avoid saying, “Oh, don’t be so sensitive,” or, “I was just joking.” Be sincere in how you apologize and move on from the conversation. In my case, I didn’t confront or seek clarification from my business colleague; if I could go back in time, I’d say, “Thank you, but is there a reason you asked me friend — to ask “Why?” until someone sees through their own (unconscious) biases. I learned that these conversations could feel awkward to address, especially in multicultural and global workplaces. And that’s okay.
?All it takes is an EAR TO LISTEN.