All Knowing Anonymity

Slowjamastan is one of the newest micronations around. Ruled by a dictator Sultan who wants to know everything about you that you are willing to share it offers citizenship and passports as long as you are willing to shun Crocs and keep your feet of the dashboard and pay.

Much as the Sultan himself (I think) I thought it was the perfect juxtaposition of the real and the absurd and so have become a Slowjamastani because; while the Netherlands (my other nationality) does not recognise dual nationality it cannot object to me being a citizen of a nation it does not recognise.

A Slowjamastan passport featuring my picture, name and birthdate is clearly as much of a ‘picture ID’ requested by many venues (office buildings, entertainment venues, random security posts) as the Dutch drivers license or Singaporean HSE course ID card that many security staff, highly trained in international ID’s, are able to accept.

So, while I am not (yet) going as far as wearing a baseball cap with IR LEDs to foil surveillance cameras and actually use my real name and particulars in my Slowjamastan passport I take some satisfaction in carrying and using an ID that is both accurate and totally … unrecognised?

There is honestly nothing much for me to hide from ‘the law’ but I do feel that big tech, big corporation and some state data gathering yields these entities much more benefit and utility than it does the user / data provider, i.e. me.

So while I take the Sultan’s warning to heart and won’t use my new passport for clear, sensible and real ID checks such as crossing a border I am more than happy to confuse and confound the average building management with my perfectly legit, if not necessarily internationally recognised, Slowjamastan ID.

While I have nothing to hide that doesn’t mean I should go around naked.

Big Brother can’t always be watching you.