All the scars (and bruises) we cannot see

No need to reiterate the "unprecedented" or "difficult" or any of the rest of what is happening in the world right now because we are all living in it - and it's both wonderful and miserable, and at the very peak, thought-provoking, thought-inspiring - thought deepening?

The headlines are a chalky dry pill we don't need to choke down further. Perhaps we are all trying to skirt something we are feeling in the headline or a tweet. Let's push the 2021 New Year to November of this year? I want a rain check on that.

Real talk: Who here is a walking doormat? Who has been bruised and beaten, but in places the world can't see? If it can be covered in clothing or makeup, the abuse doesn't exist. If the woman or man (or whatever we are identifying as) is being psychologically tortured but is also an executive in a company - if they are carrying bruises and scars the world can't see, but still carry them - and then the world goes topsy-turvy with a global and multi-dimensional pandemic that allows zero escape - and perhaps we layer in children or additional extended family members - who may also be experiencing these bruises, scars, and abuse we cannot see? And perhaps at exponential levels?

We are masterful in our coverup of these bruises and scars - we've got filters - we are walking Instagram photos. We have been largely conditioned to do so, but once we're outside of abuse, we also see it in people around us who have a flicker, some micro-expression of terror or deep sadness at moments that only other victims or abusers, or truly empathetic people feel, understand.

#psycholigcalsafety <- find that space and that truth and in the workplace

How do we, as human beings, non-binaries, the like - how do we deal with this in this world at this moment where the moment wishes us to come forward and speak our truths? Also, where is the moment demanding that we remain in potentially unsafe spaces?

We are monumental and trending hashtags - also - that is so horrific. We do not want to be. We want to run and hide. Trust that these hashtags torture us at brand-spanking new levels.

I have tremendous scars and bruises the world does not see. It's armor now. Bravery overtakes frightened - because I am out. I am free. And yet, the scars and the bruises are all walking around me - strong-ass people whom I know who have been in some variation of my shoes. Rich. Poor. And I'm not kidding - that C-Suite, I know them. Everyone in between, with clever abusers who will abuse because that's all they know, or they are legitimately mentally unstable. That's another animal to contemplate and empathize with - what they have been through in order to become the abuser.

We get hit. For some reason or another - there is a moment that we get hit as an individual - no matter what our upbringing. Or maybe with our upbringing. I'll tell you, however - I have more people than not in my life, friends who have had someone become abusive over time in such a nefariously slow build way. That's really the only way I can describe it. Those of you who know, you know.

Wonderfully resilient people come from all walks. All educational backgrounds, all family makeups. We'd love to lump all people in the same bucket of abuse, but it doesn't work like that. The nuances of this shit are astounding - it's deep, wide, and pervasive.

To say we need to find a safe space to discuss this is a dramatic understatement. We need to see people - all people - and really see them. The only power in the universe that has any value lives inside our collective, beating empathetic hearts. Yet - where to find space that is safe?

It's hard to speak your truth, out loud, and tell the world where you are. If you can't, you can tell me. I'll help you as best I can to get the fuck out and be free. And love more. I'll help because someone(s) did that for me.

/EOR/