AI Isn't Capable of Replacing Coaching

Difficult to See

It seems like everywhere I turn these days people are talking about how Artificial Intelligence (AI) is the solution to anything and everything. The concept of minimizing work for humans by putting it onto automated bots of some sort is surely attractive. There may be more accuracy in certain circumstances, as well, due to humans' inability to (in short) be perfect.

I can remember clearly a time at a previous job where I was working with a disgruntled employee who was afraid of a change that was coming. He did not understand it and he fought against it with all that he had. He was convinced that if he did the minimal work to comply with the change, it would be enough. He was also seemingly convinced that he would be able to get out of the new requirement simply because of his strong desire to go in another direction. This frustration led to many a difficult conversion.

In another situation I found myself trying to talk down a good friend who was on the verge of doing something foolish. He believed that he had been wronged and sought to do some things that he believed would help but that, in reality, would only make his situation much more challenging. His emotions had gotten the best of him and what he needed was to understand the eventual outcomes of his actions. His mind was unclear and he was prepared to do what his emotions were pushing him to do without allowing himself to think in logical patterns.

The theme in both of these situations was that both needed guidance in different ways to both understand something new and help to find their path again. Both individuals believed that they knew what the right answer was and both were sure that they could fix the situation by acting in a certain way. What was a missing for both of them was an explanation as to why a new path could benefit them in a much better way.

Coaching a Real Human

Humans are imperfect and highly capable of making mistakes. When a habit or an expectation that we have is broken or unmet, our emotions react by becoming defensive and seeking to do what is needed to get back to safe ground. It's not necessarily a bad thing that people have expectations and habits. However, where individuals and teams run into trouble is when those expectations and habits are never put into check. It could be that they are no longer necessary or helpful and yet the individual may still hold on to them. Or, worse, yet, it is possible that the expectation or habit is holding them back from being that much better of a parent, coworker, spouse, friend, etc.

Coaching allows one to step into someone else's difficult situation and help them to find an answer for themselves. I have to be clear: COACHING IS NOT TELLING SOMEONE WHAT TO DO! Coaching requires someone who understands not only what the individual wants to achieve but also the background that led them to their current circumstance. The coach needs to build a relationship with that individual where trust has been earned and is shared. That trust is what leads to transparency and an understanding of one's past and how that past applies to the future. The circumstances and emotions of both past and present give the coach an ability to do 2 things: 1 - understand why the individual is acting or reacting the way they are and 2 - have a clear knowledge of what the individual wants to achieve. If the coach has managed this, then the next step is making sure that the individual remembers where they are headed and showing them an easier path to get there.

What AI Lacks

Now don't get me wrong. AI can do and does some absolutely incredible things, many of which I will never understand how they are possible. But what AI cannot do is take into account the emotions and past circumstances of an individual (perhaps someday this will be possible but for now we have no tech I know of that holds a historical record of human emotions and circumstances). Of course the coach will not know every minute detail of the individual, but they can find key trends and stories by speaking with them and communicating openly. AI cannot have those conversations. AI cannot understand the intricacies of human comfort and the individual's goals. It misses the mark on helping the individual explore possible ways to arrive at their desired destination.

Additionally, AI may be able to give nudges to push someone to remember to take a certain action but this is, at its route, a command more than an exploration. Commands are easy to give and don't require much thought. For example, the AI may know that Bob is in a plan to become a manager and that in the company's succession plan he lacks financial planning skills and people management skills. So, to help with this, the AI might offer reminders to read certain books, participate in certain trainings, practice certain skills, etc. These are commands that might be helpful in practicing certain skills or traits needed for a job but do not get to the true point of helping the individual understand and explore how they can become more. The succession plan helps Bob get his next position but it does not necessarily help him become a better Bob.

The coach helps the individual to explore where they want to go and helps them to discover a path that is suited for them and their goals. The coach knows the frustrations, inadequacies, weaknesses, successes, and failures of the individual and discusses all of those with them. The coach reminds them where they want to get to and asks certain questions to guide the individual towards their own decision. The coach is not there to tell the individual what to do because no one knows the individual better than the individual does. Instead, the coach explores potential paths and where those paths might lead.

Summing it Up

AI has many strengths and areas where it makes massive differences. But coaches exist to help real people through tough circumstances by helping them figure out where they want to go. It can be easy to be blinded by changes and emotions but the coach is there to work through those moments and be a voice of reason without telling the individual how to handle the situation. In a way, they are a conscience for the individual only there to speak a bit more loudly and find a good path to success. The trust and friendship earned by the coach are what make the relationship unique. Humans spend a lot of time using technology that does great things. But let's not forget that nothing can replace a true face-to-face interaction with a friend.